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Post by Deleted on Jun 11, 2018 16:11:48 GMT
Truth be told, this recent event with Anthony Bourdain struck me hard.
I have been in a dark place. I can't seem to get out of this rut. I have switched jobs, and I can't get motivated to get out of bed. That new job feeling wears off after about 3-5 weeks, and I'm back to dragging myself out of bed.
Nothing makes me happy anymore. I used to love sports, now I don't really watch them. I find them arbitrary. Once I had that revelation, they feel unnecessary and fruitless.
It is as if once you think about how close death is, you start believing everything is meaningless. Social media, sports, relationships, jobs. It's like, I'm a director at a program, and I start thinking, "This is worthless, I'm going to die and so are the kids and adults I service." Who cares. If you want to do drugs, or drink, if that makes you happy, who am I to tell you you're wrong? Why do I have all the answers?
I find some comfort in Philosophy, Movies, Literature, and religion. However, it only goes so far. Then I'm back in my dark place again. It's as if once I experienced that epiphany about death, and realized I could die tomorrow, everything seems like a waste of time.
I just want to travel, experience things I've never seen before, live life to the fullest. Sitting at a desk, filing reports, doing trainings, standing in front of groups, I'm beginning to resent it. As if it's robbing me of my time, the precious time I have to do anything I wish.
I'll be 80 years old, sitting in a retirement home, being fed graham crackers and being changed 2x a day watching Jeopardy and thinking, "Well, this is it I guess. What was the point?"
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Post by Deleted on Jun 11, 2018 17:02:45 GMT
The belief that "this is all there is" can indeed be dark. Humans are wired to feel a sense of purpose, so settling on the idea that we have none creates some cognitive dissonance.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 11, 2018 17:20:22 GMT
The belief that "this is all there is" can indeed be dark. Humans are wired to feel a sense of purpose, so settling on the idea that we have none creates some cognitive dissonance. I truly believe that's my problem. I had this very dark revelation about life and death, and now I cannot find purpose in anything. Just feel like I'm waiting for an inevitable end.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 11, 2018 17:38:25 GMT
The belief that "this is all there is" can indeed be dark. Humans are wired to feel a sense of purpose, so settling on the idea that we have none creates some cognitive dissonance. I truly believe that's my problem. I had this very dark revelation about life and death, and now I cannot find purpose in anything. Just feel like I'm waiting for an inevitable end.
For whatever it's worth, I do believe that God exists and that he loves you more than you can possibly imagine. I've found that God can grant you a peace that surpasses all understanding when you let him in. But if you are seriously having these dark thoughts constantly, you know the number to call. I think I speak for everyone here when I say that we are with you, my friend.
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Post by Lugh on Jun 11, 2018 18:19:44 GMT
Truth be told, this recent event with Anthony Bourdain struck me hard.
I have been in a dark place. I can't seem to get out of this rut. I have switched jobs, and I can't get motivated to get out of bed. That new job feeling wears off after about 3-5 weeks, and I'm back to dragging myself out of bed.
Nothing makes me happy anymore. I used to love sports, now I don't really watch them. I find them arbitrary. Once I had that revelation, they feel unnecessary and fruitless.
It is as if once you think about how close death is, you start believing everything is meaningless. Social media, sports, relationships, jobs. It's like, I'm a director at a program, and I start thinking, "This is worthless, I'm going to die and so are the kids and adults I service." Who cares. If you want to do drugs, or drink, if that makes you happy, who am I to tell you you're wrong? Why do I have all the answers?
I find some comfort in Philosophy, Movies, Literature, and religion. However, it only goes so far. Then I'm back in my dark place again. It's as if once I experienced that epiphany about death, and realized I could die tomorrow, everything seems like a waste of time.
I just want to travel, experience things I've never seen before, live life to the fullest. Sitting at a desk, filing reports, doing trainings, standing in front of groups, I'm beginning to resent it. As if it's robbing me of my time, the precious time I have to do anything I wish.
I'll be 80 years old, sitting in a retirement home, being fed graham crackers and being changed 2x a day watching Jeopardy and thinking, "Well, this is it I guess. What was the point?"
You should probably go see a psychologist.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 11, 2018 18:35:37 GMT
I truly believe that's my problem. I had this very dark revelation about life and death, and now I cannot find purpose in anything. Just feel like I'm waiting for an inevitable end.
For whatever it's worth, I do believe that God exists and that he loves you more than you can possibly imagine. I've found that God can grant you a peace that surpasses all understanding when you let him in. But if you are seriously having these dark thoughts constantly, you know the number to call. I think I speak for everyone here when I say that we are with you, my friend. Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate that.
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Post by rachelcarson1953 on Jun 11, 2018 18:47:19 GMT
Truth be told, this recent event with Anthony Bourdain struck me hard.
I have been in a dark place. I can't seem to get out of this rut. I have switched jobs, and I can't get motivated to get out of bed. That new job feeling wears off after about 3-5 weeks, and I'm back to dragging myself out of bed.
Nothing makes me happy anymore. I used to love sports, now I don't really watch them. I find them arbitrary. Once I had that revelation, they feel unnecessary and fruitless.
It is as if once you think about how close death is, you start believing everything is meaningless. Social media, sports, relationships, jobs. It's like, I'm a director at a program, and I start thinking, "This is worthless, I'm going to die and so are the kids and adults I service." Who cares. If you want to do drugs, or drink, if that makes you happy, who am I to tell you you're wrong? Why do I have all the answers?
I find some comfort in Philosophy, Movies, Literature, and religion. However, it only goes so far. Then I'm back in my dark place again. It's as if once I experienced that epiphany about death, and realized I could die tomorrow, everything seems like a waste of time.
I just want to travel, experience things I've never seen before, live life to the fullest. Sitting at a desk, filing reports, doing trainings, standing in front of groups, I'm beginning to resent it. As if it's robbing me of my time, the precious time I have to do anything I wish.
I'll be 80 years old, sitting in a retirement home, being fed graham crackers and being changed 2x a day watching Jeopardy and thinking, "Well, this is it I guess. What was the point?"
I've been in that dark place before. I know at least one other poster here who has also. First, vow not to act on it for, say, 6 months. Second, I am on anti-depressants and an anti-anxiety med, and it helps. Find a therapist, or just an internist that will be able to prescribe meds. Third, in my own life I found a reason to live, to lessen suffering of myself and others in the here-and-now. Yes, everyone and everything dies. But, while they are here, I want to make certain there is less suffering because of my actions. I volunteer with a non-profit animal rescue group, and we do prevent suffering of animals that others have mistreated and discarded. As long as I am alive and can help alleviate suffering, I'm hanging in, though I do have a ongoing situation in my life that causes me suffering, something very similar to your job issues. Give all this a chance, hence the six months. Now, speaking only for myself, I will never end up in a care facility because I know how to take my own life if I can no longer take care of myself. I see suicide as an end to suffering or to prevent suffering, and I believe every individual has that right to make that decision. What is too much suffering? That's every individual's choice. I wish you a respite from your dark place.
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Post by Terrapin Station on Jun 11, 2018 19:06:25 GMT
Truth be told, this recent event with Anthony Bourdain struck me hard.
I have been in a dark place. I can't seem to get out of this rut. I have switched jobs, and I can't get motivated to get out of bed. That new job feeling wears off after about 3-5 weeks, and I'm back to dragging myself out of bed.
Nothing makes me happy anymore. I used to love sports, now I don't really watch them. I find them arbitrary. Once I had that revelation, they feel unnecessary and fruitless.
It is as if once you think about how close death is, you start believing everything is meaningless. Social media, sports, relationships, jobs. It's like, I'm a director at a program, and I start thinking, "This is worthless, I'm going to die and so are the kids and adults I service." Who cares. If you want to do drugs, or drink, if that makes you happy, who am I to tell you you're wrong? Why do I have all the answers?
I find some comfort in Philosophy, Movies, Literature, and religion. However, it only goes so far. Then I'm back in my dark place again. It's as if once I experienced that epiphany about death, and realized I could die tomorrow, everything seems like a waste of time.
I just want to travel, experience things I've never seen before, live life to the fullest. Sitting at a desk, filing reports, doing trainings, standing in front of groups, I'm beginning to resent it. As if it's robbing me of my time, the precious time I have to do anything I wish.
I'll be 80 years old, sitting in a retirement home, being fed graham crackers and being changed 2x a day watching Jeopardy and thinking, "Well, this is it I guess. What was the point?"
Aside possibly from "clinical depression," in which case a psychiatrist might be able to help, the two big problems here are: (a) thinking that there is, there has to be, there should be, etc. meaning that somehow "pervades the universe," (b) thinking that things are only worthwhile if they're permanent You need to throw out both of those beliefs above, (a) and (b), as soon as possible. Meaning is something that we do as individuals. So anything can have meaning if you think of it meaningfully, if you create meaning for it. That's all that meaning is. It's all it's ever been. For (b), learn how to focus on the here and now. Focus on what is, right this second. Nothing needs to be more than that. Nothing is inferior for not being more than that. And really nothing can possibly be more than that. Live each moment and experience it fully. You only get that one chance to experience it, so milk it for all that it is while it's there. The next moment is going to be different. Embrace each one as it passes, and don't worry about what was or what is yet to be. If you learn how to live fully in the moment and you realize that meaning is only something you create, then it will start to seem silly to you that you ever worried about whether anything has permanence or whether there was any external meaning.
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Post by Aj_June on Jun 12, 2018 6:44:21 GMT
Truth be told, this recent event with Anthony Bourdain struck me hard.
I have been in a dark place. I can't seem to get out of this rut. I have switched jobs, and I can't get motivated to get out of bed. That new job feeling wears off after about 3-5 weeks, and I'm back to dragging myself out of bed.
Nothing makes me happy anymore. I used to love sports, now I don't really watch them. I find them arbitrary. Once I had that revelation, they feel unnecessary and fruitless.
It is as if once you think about how close death is, you start believing everything is meaningless. Social media, sports, relationships, jobs. It's like, I'm a director at a program, and I start thinking, "This is worthless, I'm going to die and so are the kids and adults I service." Who cares. If you want to do drugs, or drink, if that makes you happy, who am I to tell you you're wrong? Why do I have all the answers?
I find some comfort in Philosophy, Movies, Literature, and religion. However, it only goes so far. Then I'm back in my dark place again. It's as if once I experienced that epiphany about death, and realized I could die tomorrow, everything seems like a waste of time.
I just want to travel, experience things I've never seen before, live life to the fullest. Sitting at a desk, filing reports, doing trainings, standing in front of groups, I'm beginning to resent it. As if it's robbing me of my time, the precious time I have to do anything I wish.
I'll be 80 years old, sitting in a retirement home, being fed graham crackers and being changed 2x a day watching Jeopardy and thinking, "Well, this is it I guess. What was the point?"
Would you prefer immortality if given the choice?
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Post by Aj_June on Jun 12, 2018 6:52:28 GMT
Arlon10Must say that in all these years I have never ever seen you talk about death and after life. Would you please take your time out to share your views on what death represents to you? Do you think we need to any particular things before dying? If there is a life after death then what form do you think it has?
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Post by Marv on Jun 12, 2018 7:24:13 GMT
I’ve been through it at times. Not sure what brings on bouts of...I hate to use the term depression but that’s as close as I can think of it in regards to my inevitable demise.
I have no answers...only that eventually I’ll laugh at something and get in a better mood about it.
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Post by Arlon10 on Jun 12, 2018 8:07:02 GMT
Arlon10 Must say that in all these years I have never ever seen you talk about death and after life. Would you please take your time out to share your views on what death represents to you? Do you think we need to any particular things before dying? If there is a life after death then what form do you think it has? I don't say much about the afterlife because I don't know. I have received no revelations myself. My opinion on various reports from others ... Dr. Mary C. Neal Dr. Neal's account of heaven might be accurately detailed, but I rather tend to believe it is merely a "vision" that requires interpretation. There is more likely a message addressing some immediate concern rather than a complete course on heavenly architecture and furnishings. Colton Burpo Some on this board might think Burpo recanted his testimony about heaven, but I think they might be confusing him with Alex Malarkey. Here too I suspect the comprehensive details of heaven are not the point, there is some more immediate message that needs to be derived. Also it doesn't matter whether Burpo did or does recant, the Holy Spirit can work even through the vainglorious. I'm "absolutely certain" there is an afterlife, but I'm not sure how I would know something like that, and I have no details.
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Post by yezziqa on Jun 12, 2018 8:19:50 GMT
You have to go and see your doctor, that sounds like a classic depression. Your levels of serotonin might be abnormal, and to treat that you need medicine. You see, depression is not just a mentalproblem, it's also physical. And bring a friend/familymember/co-worker/etc with you to participate at the doctor, it's always good to have someone onboard, as we with depressions tend to be forgetful. They can also tell the doctor what changes they have noticed. When you are feeling better, just do it! No one is stopping you from living the life you want, but you.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2018 16:41:59 GMT
When you are feeling better, just do it! No one is stopping you from living the life you want, but you. This quote is true, but also not true. It's the way our society is formed and functions. I have to work to support my family. If I don't, they lose their home and cannot afford to pay their bills.
I wish this world were like the Native Americans. Human beings weren't meant to work to pay bills and live inside an office or cubicle space for 8-12 hours at a time daily.
I wish we were a collectivistic society. People were meant to live outside, that's why the sun gives us vitamin D and boots our serotonin.
I wish we lived in groups who had roles. People were hunters, gathers, made clothes, cooked, built shelters, lead people, etc... Same with the old Hebrew tribes and a lot of old world middle eastern tribes.
This notion that we each go to school for 12 years, go to college, get a degree, begin a career, and pay bills. I hate it. You are telling an 18 year old kid to decide what he/she is going to do for the next 45 years of their life. I'm a freshman in college, my frontal lobe hasn't fully developed, I don't have wisdom or understanding of the world. I'm just saying, "Oh, this sounds interesting or good." Then you go to college for 4-6 years, get a degree, begin the career, and decide you hate it. Oh well, you're stuck because college is expensive, and you cannot afford to go back and start over.
Then you get married and have kids, and you have to support them. You can't just quit your job and be free. It's insane.
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Post by yezziqa on Jun 12, 2018 16:57:44 GMT
When you are feeling better, just do it! No one is stopping you from living the life you want, but you. This quote is true, but also not true. It's the way our society is formed and functions. I have to work to support my family. If I don't, they lose their home and cannot afford to pay their bills.
I wish this world were like the Native Americans. Human beings weren't meant to work to pay bills and live inside an office or cubicle space for 8-12 hours at a time daily.
I wish we were a collectivistic society. People were meant to live outside, that's why the sun gives us vitamin D and boots our serotonin.
I wish we lived in groups who had roles. People were hunters, gathers, made clothes, cooked, built shelters, lead people, etc... Same with the old Hebrew tribes and a lot of old world middle eastern tribes.
This notion that we each go to school for 12 years, go to college, get a degree, begin a career, and pay bills. I hate it. You are telling an 18 year old kid to decide what he/she is going to do for the next 45 years of their life. I'm a freshman in college, my frontal lobe hasn't fully developed, I don't have wisdom or understanding of the world. I'm just saying, "Oh, this sounds interesting or good." Then you go to college for 4-6 years, get a degree, begin the career, and decide you hate it. Oh well, you're stuck because college is expensive, and you cannot afford to go back and start over.
Then you get married and have kids, and you have to support them. You can't just quit your job and be free. It's insane.
Then stop producing bills. 10 years ago I did just that by taking away everything that isn't my minimum (some food, housing, electrical bill, internet, that is all), that have given me freedom to do what I want with most of my time. Nobody needs the lastest technology, clothes that can dress a small nation or big house, but the people selling these things sure have made a good job in convincing people that they do need them. Step of the hamster wheel, you are not getting anywhere by continuing to run in it.
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Post by rachelcarson1953 on Jun 12, 2018 17:44:31 GMT
When you are feeling better, just do it! No one is stopping you from living the life you want, but you. This quote is true, but also not true. It's the way our society is formed and functions. I have to work to support my family. If I don't, they lose their home and cannot afford to pay their bills.
I wish this world were like the Native Americans. Human beings weren't meant to work to pay bills and live inside an office or cubicle space for 8-12 hours at a time daily.
I wish we were a collectivistic society. People were meant to live outside, that's why the sun gives us vitamin D and boots our serotonin.
I wish we lived in groups who had roles. People were hunters, gathers, made clothes, cooked, built shelters, lead people, etc... Same with the old Hebrew tribes and a lot of old world middle eastern tribes.
This notion that we each go to school for 12 years, go to college, get a degree, begin a career, and pay bills. I hate it. You are telling an 18 year old kid to decide what he/she is going to do for the next 45 years of their life. I'm a freshman in college, my frontal lobe hasn't fully developed, I don't have wisdom or understanding of the world. I'm just saying, "Oh, this sounds interesting or good." Then you go to college for 4-6 years, get a degree, begin the career, and decide you hate it. Oh well, you're stuck because college is expensive, and you cannot afford to go back and start over.
Then you get married and have kids, and you have to support them. You can't just quit your job and be free. It's insane.
I know how you feel. I am an only child who is having to care for a 95 year old mother, and there just is no other way around it. I have reduced my lifestyle, as yezziqa has, but I still have basic bills to pay in order to survive, and then there is my mother. If I take off and go live my own life, what happens to her? No one else cares enough to do what I am doing for her, and a state run care facility is tantamount to torture. There is no universal healthcare in the USA to access if one is low-income, kids have to eat and go to the doctor and a house needs maintenance - yes, this modern lifestyle is a trap, a hamster wheel, but unless your entire family wants to go live off-grid, you are kind of stuck. My late husband and I chose not to have children, but now I have a 95 year old toddler to deal with, and have to continue to earn money in order to support all this. I try to find moments, sometimes even a day, when I can escape, to a botanical garden, a hike in the woods, something, ANYTHING to just be me for a while. And, because I am an artist, I can create an artistic work that reminds me of this great day or moment. When I am dealing with the rest of the crap, I will page through that sketchbook, remembering it's not all crap. When I find an adoptive home for a cat, I document that with a sketch or a photo. I press leaves and flower petals in phone books and create a collage. I spend time outdoors every day. Right now that sustains me, but I still have bad days. Hang in there, and try to gradually increase those moments, until the kids are grown, the wife says okay to selling the house and buying an RV or living off-grid, but find a moment or more every day to savor. Edit: As I re-read your post, I was reminded of the movie "Parenthood", 1989, Steve Martin, Mary Steenburgen, and this quote from Gil (Steve Martin) who was also experiencing a period of questioning. Karen: Do you really have to go? Gil: My whole life is "have to."
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2018 20:12:05 GMT
This quote is true, but also not true. It's the way our society is formed and functions. I have to work to support my family. If I don't, they lose their home and cannot afford to pay their bills.
I wish this world were like the Native Americans. Human beings weren't meant to work to pay bills and live inside an office or cubicle space for 8-12 hours at a time daily.
I wish we were a collectivistic society. People were meant to live outside, that's why the sun gives us vitamin D and boots our serotonin.
I wish we lived in groups who had roles. People were hunters, gathers, made clothes, cooked, built shelters, lead people, etc... Same with the old Hebrew tribes and a lot of old world middle eastern tribes.
This notion that we each go to school for 12 years, go to college, get a degree, begin a career, and pay bills. I hate it. You are telling an 18 year old kid to decide what he/she is going to do for the next 45 years of their life. I'm a freshman in college, my frontal lobe hasn't fully developed, I don't have wisdom or understanding of the world. I'm just saying, "Oh, this sounds interesting or good." Then you go to college for 4-6 years, get a degree, begin the career, and decide you hate it. Oh well, you're stuck because college is expensive, and you cannot afford to go back and start over.
Then you get married and have kids, and you have to support them. You can't just quit your job and be free. It's insane.
I know how you feel. I am an only child who is having to care for a 95 year old mother, and there just is no other way around it. I have reduced my lifestyle, as yezziqa has, but I still have basic bills to pay in order to survive, and then there is my mother. If I take off and go live my own life, what happens to her? No one else cares enough to do what I am doing for her, and a state run care facility is tantamount to torture. There is no universal healthcare in the USA to access if one is low-income, kids have to eat and go to the doctor and a house needs maintenance - yes, this modern lifestyle is a trap, a hamster wheel, but unless your entire family wants to go live off-grid, you are kind of stuck. My late husband and I chose not to have children, but now I have a 95 year old toddler to deal with, and have to continue to earn money in order to support all this. I try to find moments, sometimes even a day, when I can escape, to a botanical garden, a hike in the woods, something, ANYTHING to just be me for a while. And, because I am an artist, I can create an artistic work that reminds me of this great day or moment. When I am dealing with the rest of the crap, I will page through that sketchbook, remembering it's not all crap. When I find an adoptive home for a cat, I document that with a sketch or a photo. I press leaves and flower petals in phone books and create a collage. I spend time outdoors every day. Right now that sustains me, but I still have bad days. Hang in there, and try to gradually increase those moments, until the kids are grown, the wife says okay to selling the house and buying an RV or living off-grid, but find a moment or more every day to savor. Edit: As I re-read your post, I was reminded of the movie "Parenthood", 1989, Steve Martin, Mary Steenburgen, and this quote from Gil (Steve Martin) who was also experiencing a period of questioning. Karen: Do you really have to go? Gil: My whole life is "have to." I will have to see 'Parenthood' sounds interesting. I love Steve Martin.
I appreciate your correspondence. I truly take to heart what you're saying. I think sitting down and planning, even just processing an idea to do 'x' things to get a lifestyle in order would give me hope.
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Post by rachelcarson1953 on Jun 12, 2018 21:33:28 GMT
I know how you feel. I am an only child who is having to care for a 95 year old mother, and there just is no other way around it. I have reduced my lifestyle, as yezziqa has, but I still have basic bills to pay in order to survive, and then there is my mother. If I take off and go live my own life, what happens to her? No one else cares enough to do what I am doing for her, and a state run care facility is tantamount to torture. There is no universal healthcare in the USA to access if one is low-income, kids have to eat and go to the doctor and a house needs maintenance - yes, this modern lifestyle is a trap, a hamster wheel, but unless your entire family wants to go live off-grid, you are kind of stuck. My late husband and I chose not to have children, but now I have a 95 year old toddler to deal with, and have to continue to earn money in order to support all this. I try to find moments, sometimes even a day, when I can escape, to a botanical garden, a hike in the woods, something, ANYTHING to just be me for a while. And, because I am an artist, I can create an artistic work that reminds me of this great day or moment. When I am dealing with the rest of the crap, I will page through that sketchbook, remembering it's not all crap. When I find an adoptive home for a cat, I document that with a sketch or a photo. I press leaves and flower petals in phone books and create a collage. I spend time outdoors every day. Right now that sustains me, but I still have bad days. Hang in there, and try to gradually increase those moments, until the kids are grown, the wife says okay to selling the house and buying an RV or living off-grid, but find a moment or more every day to savor. Edit: As I re-read your post, I was reminded of the movie "Parenthood", 1989, Steve Martin, Mary Steenburgen, and this quote from Gil (Steve Martin) who was also experiencing a period of questioning. Karen: Do you really have to go? Gil: My whole life is "have to." I will have to see 'Parenthood' sounds interesting. I love Steve Martin.
I appreciate your correspondence. I truly take to heart what you're saying. I think sitting down and planning, even just processing an idea to do 'x' things to get a lifestyle in order would give me hope.
Start processing and planning, it will give you hope and I wish the very best for you. There will still be bad days, but having something to look forward to will keep you going. Take care! Edit: Almost thirty years ago I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Adenocarcinoma; I was only 35 years old, and this was a hereditary disease. I'd lost many relatives to it. I considered not treating it, just taking off with my husband and maximizing whatever time I had left, but my husband wouldn't let me, he said, "I want you here". The next year and a half was spent in surgeries and chemotherapies, and it sucked big time. My husband bought a satellite dish to amuse me while feeling like crap. One of the movies I watched over and over again was "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" with Steve Martin and Michael Caine. It made me laugh, even at 2 am when I couldn't sleep or the painkillers weren't working. Never underestimate the power of humor.
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Post by goz on Jun 12, 2018 22:29:53 GMT
I will have to see 'Parenthood' sounds interesting. I love Steve Martin.
I appreciate your correspondence. I truly take to heart what you're saying. I think sitting down and planning, even just processing an idea to do 'x' things to get a lifestyle in order would give me hope.
Start processing and planning, it will give you hope and I wish the very best for you. There will still be bad days, but having something to look forward to will keep you going. Take care! Edit: Almost thirty years ago I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Adenocarcinoma; I was only 35 years old, and this was a hereditary disease. I'd lost many relatives to it. I considered not treating it, just taking off with my husband and maximizing whatever time I had left, but my husband wouldn't let me, he said, "I want you here". The next year and a half was spent in surgeries and chemotherapies, and it sucked big time. My husband bought a satellite dish to amuse me while feeling like crap. One of the movies I watched over and over again was "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" with Steve Martin and Michael Caine. It made me laugh, even at 2 am when I couldn't sleep or the painkillers weren't working. Never underestimate the power of humor. I so agree rachelcarson1953. The problem with depression is not getting sucked into the void of self fulfilling darkness, or as they often call it 'the black dog' on your shoulder ( no offence to black dogs I have a really lovely cute one). To do this, you need 'hope'. That feeling of lifting out of the blackness and void of hopelessness that you feel, People telling you this means nothing, you have to find some way to do this for yourself. Everyone and their circumstances is different however the trick is to find something to rescue you and I suggest '1. Nature 2. other people 3. laughter... be it with others or even as Rachael said at a silly movie. Look at your circumstances and see what is possible. If you have a wife and family, I suggest you ALL do yourselves a favour and get in the car at the weekend, pack a picnic lunch and drive to a beach or a mountain or a lake. ALL decide not to take your mobile phone devices and ALL just go for a walk (exercise) and eat together simple food and re-connect as a family. It sounds corny. I bet it ( or some variation) would work. Don't forget that your family are also stuck in this rut you have made for yourselves and maybe you can beat it together.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 14, 2018 17:52:51 GMT
Start processing and planning, it will give you hope and I wish the very best for you. There will still be bad days, but having something to look forward to will keep you going. Take care! Edit: Almost thirty years ago I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Adenocarcinoma; I was only 35 years old, and this was a hereditary disease. I'd lost many relatives to it. I considered not treating it, just taking off with my husband and maximizing whatever time I had left, but my husband wouldn't let me, he said, "I want you here". The next year and a half was spent in surgeries and chemotherapies, and it sucked big time. My husband bought a satellite dish to amuse me while feeling like crap. One of the movies I watched over and over again was "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" with Steve Martin and Michael Caine. It made me laugh, even at 2 am when I couldn't sleep or the painkillers weren't working. Never underestimate the power of humor. I so agree rachelcarson1953 . The problem with depression is not getting sucked into the void of self fulfilling darkness, or as they often call it 'the black dog' on your shoulder ( no offence to black dogs I have a really lovely cute one). To do this, you need 'hope'. That feeling of lifting out of the blackness and void of hopelessness that you feel, People telling you this means nothing, you have to find some way to do this for yourself. Everyone and their circumstances is different however the trick is to find something to rescue you and I suggest '1. Nature 2. other people 3. laughter... be it with others or even as Rachael said at a silly movie. Look at your circumstances and see what is possible. If you have a wife and family, I suggest you ALL do yourselves a favour and get in the car at the weekend, pack a picnic lunch and drive to a beach or a mountain or a lake. ALL decide not to take your mobile phone devices and ALL just go for a walk (exercise) and eat together simple food and re-connect as a family. It sounds corny. I bet it ( or some variation) would work. Don't forget that your family are also stuck in this rut you have made for yourselves and maybe you can beat it together. Thank you. I appreciate the advice. I will take this into consideration and use it in the future.
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