BAKERS DOZEN: WHY DID THE MECHANIC GET HIS ASS BANNED???!!!
May 29, 2017 11:34:54 GMT
BATouttaheck likes this
Post by tarathian123 on May 29, 2017 11:34:54 GMT
Possibly infinite number of reasons why this mysterious person was banned:
01. Charles Bronson is not to everyone's taste.
02. Some people started complaining about the smell of fish.
03. There was not enough catnip to go around.
04. It was determined that his license to mechan had expired
05. He was an active member of the EPRL ("Equal Pay for Robots League").
06. For posting topics in the wrong forum.
07. For not googling before asking silly questions.
08. He refused to wear pants when posting.
09. Offences against the "Cruelty to Mangoes Act".
10. Charles Bronson rose from the grave and took his soul to hell.
11. He refused to give up his teddy bear and stop sucking his thumb.
12. Global Warming threatened his best friend and he was being too much of a "downer" about it.
13. Why was he banned? Why did the chicken cross the road? These are epistemological questions that have puzzled man since the days of the early Greeks.
14. SNOWbody knows !
15. Chemtrails.
16. He became overly abusive in his jealousy over Catman's Cool Avatars
17. He was about to reveal Admin's secret Identity as xxxx <-- deleted to protect the info
18. He gave away IMDB secrets to Wikileaks
19. His real identity as a Martian agent was discovered
20. He went mad because he didn't pay attention when using "participated" and his posts went out of order.
21. All his helpers went missing then it was discovered he had acid baths in his apartment.
22. He stole the spoiler warning button and refused to give it back.
23. He was about to figure out where we've hidden Lord Lucan and Elvis
24. He was about the reveal secret egg salad recipe stolen from the Grand Exalted High Majah of Raspur.
25. He used deodorant made from bitches pee. The guard dogs went crazy.
26. He got irate because people kept referring to him as NICK and he hates that.
27. Jason Statham made a personal request.
28. A polling of his peers determined that he simply HAD to go.
29. "Banned or bumped off" says compromised wife of Hitman's Weekly editor, "it was his choice".
30. He keep "just peeking in" and staying up too late. His boss asked admin to ban him. Admin accommodated.
31. He had a hissy fit when he discovered Aristotle's treatise was not about hitmen.
32. For continually reporting Bat Outtaheck for changing his avatars too often.
33. Because other posters complained continually about him changing his socks. (hmmm that one just might be true (?)
34. His mother was a hamster and his father smelt of elderberries!
35. He was too far in arrears with his Hitman's Union dues.
36. Because Jason Statham felt it was "Expendable"....ha, ha (sorry)
37. The truth is that he was not banned. He quit voluntarily and became a cloistered monk.
38. The Mechanic is believed to be banned. And he must let the world think that he is banned, until he can find a way to control the raging spirit that dwells within him.
39. He was caught stealing women's under-garments that were drying on a line. Is he really a she?
40. He was seen once too often driving his garbage down the street and banging the hell out of it with a stick.
41. The banned mechanic was only a stand-in. The real one was abducted by space aliens two months ago.
42. He was caught mixing his recyclables with his trash.
43. Repeated delusions that he was Napoleon. The pig, not the emperor.
44. Because Statham shat in his pants and was too busy wiping his ass and cleaning up the mess.
45. He forgot to renew his driver's license for two years.
46. He discovered that Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy don't really exist, and he went berserk.
47. He mixed his whites and colors when doing laundry.
48. He/she didn't fix my Chevy pickup properly so i reported to admin.
49. He hasn't been banned. He was caught in Area 51 trying to "Phone Home", and is being held there for further investigation.
50. To inspire this curiously addictive thread. The original poster has vanished and the true meaning of his OP is a total mystery to one and all. But do we care ?
51. Not a jot!! To continue...He fell in love with a Triffid, and they are now enjoying a honeymoon somewhere in the Amazonian jungle. A movie is planned.
51a Note Re: #51. It is rumored that Jason Statham will star in said movie.
52. BREAKING NEWS that the Mechanic is trying for a solo attempt on Mount Everest. Spotted in the South Col talking to a Yeti. Probably fake news. To be confirmed.
53. Out of turn, but MORE BREAKING NEWS. The Mechanic was observed finding a full face mask in a creek. Having apparently recently watched the movie "The Mask", he excitedly tried it on. According to said observers he immediately disappeared, and hasn't been seen since. Police are baffled.
53a. In view of all the bizarre rumours and reports surrounding the Mechanic does this mean we are now faced with possible world-wide copycat Mechanics? Watch this space.
54. A man resembling Mechanic was spotted climbing the Empire State Building carrying a woman. It is feared that he missed IMDb-2 so much that he us trying to recreate his favorite film scene.
55. Conspiracy theorists are linking Mechanic to the Great Fire of London as he was seen entering the Tardis with Dr Who. That the Tardis is only a mock-up is not swaying their opinion. Is this getting out of hand?
01. Charles Bronson is not to everyone's taste.
02. Some people started complaining about the smell of fish.
03. There was not enough catnip to go around.
04. It was determined that his license to mechan had expired
05. He was an active member of the EPRL ("Equal Pay for Robots League").
06. For posting topics in the wrong forum.
07. For not googling before asking silly questions.
08. He refused to wear pants when posting.
09. Offences against the "Cruelty to Mangoes Act".
10. Charles Bronson rose from the grave and took his soul to hell.
11. He refused to give up his teddy bear and stop sucking his thumb.
12. Global Warming threatened his best friend and he was being too much of a "downer" about it.
13. Why was he banned? Why did the chicken cross the road? These are epistemological questions that have puzzled man since the days of the early Greeks.
14. SNOWbody knows !
15. Chemtrails.
16. He became overly abusive in his jealousy over Catman's Cool Avatars
17. He was about to reveal Admin's secret Identity as xxxx <-- deleted to protect the info
18. He gave away IMDB secrets to Wikileaks
19. His real identity as a Martian agent was discovered
20. He went mad because he didn't pay attention when using "participated" and his posts went out of order.
21. All his helpers went missing then it was discovered he had acid baths in his apartment.
22. He stole the spoiler warning button and refused to give it back.
23. He was about to figure out where we've hidden Lord Lucan and Elvis
24. He was about the reveal secret egg salad recipe stolen from the Grand Exalted High Majah of Raspur.
25. He used deodorant made from bitches pee. The guard dogs went crazy.
26. He got irate because people kept referring to him as NICK and he hates that.
27. Jason Statham made a personal request.
28. A polling of his peers determined that he simply HAD to go.
29. "Banned or bumped off" says compromised wife of Hitman's Weekly editor, "it was his choice".
30. He keep "just peeking in" and staying up too late. His boss asked admin to ban him. Admin accommodated.
31. He had a hissy fit when he discovered Aristotle's treatise was not about hitmen.
32. For continually reporting Bat Outtaheck for changing his avatars too often.
33. Because other posters complained continually about him changing his socks. (hmmm that one just might be true (?)
34. His mother was a hamster and his father smelt of elderberries!
35. He was too far in arrears with his Hitman's Union dues.
36. Because Jason Statham felt it was "Expendable"....ha, ha (sorry)
37. The truth is that he was not banned. He quit voluntarily and became a cloistered monk.
38. The Mechanic is believed to be banned. And he must let the world think that he is banned, until he can find a way to control the raging spirit that dwells within him.
39. He was caught stealing women's under-garments that were drying on a line. Is he really a she?
40. He was seen once too often driving his garbage down the street and banging the hell out of it with a stick.
41. The banned mechanic was only a stand-in. The real one was abducted by space aliens two months ago.
42. He was caught mixing his recyclables with his trash.
43. Repeated delusions that he was Napoleon. The pig, not the emperor.
44. Because Statham shat in his pants and was too busy wiping his ass and cleaning up the mess.
45. He forgot to renew his driver's license for two years.
46. He discovered that Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy don't really exist, and he went berserk.
47. He mixed his whites and colors when doing laundry.
48. He/she didn't fix my Chevy pickup properly so i reported to admin.
49. He hasn't been banned. He was caught in Area 51 trying to "Phone Home", and is being held there for further investigation.
50. To inspire this curiously addictive thread. The original poster has vanished and the true meaning of his OP is a total mystery to one and all. But do we care ?
51. Not a jot!! To continue...He fell in love with a Triffid, and they are now enjoying a honeymoon somewhere in the Amazonian jungle. A movie is planned.
51a Note Re: #51. It is rumored that Jason Statham will star in said movie.
52. BREAKING NEWS that the Mechanic is trying for a solo attempt on Mount Everest. Spotted in the South Col talking to a Yeti. Probably fake news. To be confirmed.
53. Out of turn, but MORE BREAKING NEWS. The Mechanic was observed finding a full face mask in a creek. Having apparently recently watched the movie "The Mask", he excitedly tried it on. According to said observers he immediately disappeared, and hasn't been seen since. Police are baffled.
53a. In view of all the bizarre rumours and reports surrounding the Mechanic does this mean we are now faced with possible world-wide copycat Mechanics? Watch this space.
54. A man resembling Mechanic was spotted climbing the Empire State Building carrying a woman. It is feared that he missed IMDb-2 so much that he us trying to recreate his favorite film scene.
55. Conspiracy theorists are linking Mechanic to the Great Fire of London as he was seen entering the Tardis with Dr Who. That the Tardis is only a mock-up is not swaying their opinion. Is this getting out of hand?