Poor oppressed umpires

God I can't stand MLB umpires. You're so oppressed. You're completely above reproach. Every call of every game you make is perfect. How dare anyone EVER criticize a single call you make? I mean, when I buy a ticket to a game, I don't want to see Mike Trout or Bryce Harper or Clayton Kershaw, I want to see You! So please, continue to wear your white wristbands to point out that there's Jesus, there's Nelson Mandela, and then there's Joe West and Angel Hernandez.

Angel Hernandez Up On The Cross