What classics did you see last week ? (28 Oct - 3 Nov 2018)

The Walking Dead (1936)

 6/10

  7/10

2 favourites, and Vertigo was a big screen 1st time.


First 2 seasons - 6 episodes

My son's current obsession -

Blonde Venus / Josef von Sternberg (1932). This is the fourth of six movies that paired Marlene Dietrich with director Sternberg. This pre-code goodie deals in mainly short scenes, almost vignettes, that cut away leaving sometimes very big narrative gaps. For an example, the opening shows us six showgirls skinny-dipping in a pond in Germany. As they frolic, they are approached by seven college students from America. They refuse to go away until the girls agree to see them later. Helen (Dietrich) makes a date with Ned (Herbert Marshall). Cut to Helen bathing a toddler in a dingy apartment in America where she lives with husband Ned. Ned is a struggling chemist who has been diagnosed with radiation poisoning. Back in Germany is a doctor with a new cure but it will cost $1,500 for the cure plus $300 for passage. Where is the money going to come from? Helen goes back to work singing in a nightclub where she meet political boss Nick Townsend (Cary Grant). She becomes Townsend’s lover to, at first, get the money needed for the medical care, but after Ned has left for Europe, she and Nick fall in love. The love triangle leads to ruin and degradation for Helen until, with another fast cut, she is the toast of Paris. Once you fall into this rhythm, the film makes sense and is enjoyable. There is a highly improbable and sentimental ending but it had to happen that way.

Sternberg puts Marlene into yet another tuxedo, this one white. That’s Cary Grant on her right.


The Girl Who Dared / Howard Bretherton (1944). It was Dark And Stormy Night at the Old Dark House on an island. The telephone wires have been cut. And, oh, did I mention secret passages? This brief (52 minutes) mystery programmer has everything needed for an entertaining second feature to wrap up an enjoyable evening at the movies in the 1940s. This light and breezy thriller also features a old dark house full of recognizable character actors. I knew just about everybody in the cast except the two leads, Lorna Gray and Peter Cookson. On hand are Roy Barcroft (a villain in multiple B-westerns and chapter serials), John Hamilton (Perry White in the 1950s Superman series), Grant Withers (the Mr. Wong movies), Kirk Alyn (the Superman serials), Veda Ann Borg as twin sisters, and the ubiquitous Willie Best doing his usual frightened servant thing. I keep expecting at least once to see Best turn out to be the diabolical killer, but, alas, I don’t think it ever happened.



Follow Me Quietly / Richard Fleischer (1949). This early effort from Richard Fleischer Fleischer (The Vikings, Fantastic Voyage) was a training ground for how to pack as much punch as possible into an hour on a small budget and short shooting schedule. Fleischer learned his lessons well. We run into that terrifying character that was just starting to make his mark in movies – the serial killer. This one calls himself The Judge. He is out to cleanse the world. He kills by strangulation and his victims are both men and women. This movie also sets the tone with the Obsessed Police Detective whose own peace of mind is threatened by his inability to catch the killer. Second tier leading man William Lundigan plays the angst-ridden Homicide Lieutenant. Jeff Corey is Lundigan’s more balanced partner. Dorothy Patrick, whose work I am not familiar with, is very good as a journalist for a sensational crime magazine. She at first annoys Lundigan before becoming a help and love interest. There is an exciting chase finale in some kind of industrial plant.



Frank Ferguson is about to meet The Judge in Follow Me Quietly


Monkey Business / Howard Hawks (1952). Absent-minded professor Cary Grant is so focused on his unsuccessful formula for stopping the aging process that he neglects sexy wife Ginger Rogers. One day one of the chimpanzees used for experiments escapes her cage and mixes some chemicals together. What she combines just happens to be the correct formula. The chimp then dumps the liquid in the lab water cooler. Grant and Rogers both have a great time acting very silly as the rejuvenation potion regresses them both to earlier stages in life, showing what great comedy actors they can be. Marilyn Monroe, billed fourth, is quite funny, too, as a secretary whose only quality is her sexiness. Boss Charles Coburn hands her a paper and says, “Find somebody to type this.” Oddly enough, “Monkey Business” (not to be confused with the Marx Bros. 1931 piece of anarchy of the same title) underperformed at the box office. In an interview with Peter Bogdanovich, Hawks said that he believed that the audiences couldn’t accept that a chimp could accidentally find the right ingredients but I think that movie audiences will except about anything in the right context. The problem might have been that this kind of screwball comedy had already run its course and appeared old fashioned. Today, of course, much more time has passed and modern viewers can enjoy it for what it is – a hilarious knockabout farce, maybe a few minutes too long, a bit too repetitious, but not enough to spoil any of the fun.



The Hound Of The Baskervilles / Terence Fisher (1959). This familiar story by Arthur Conan Doyle which was first serialized in the Strand Magazine then in novel form in 1903 is given its first color film production by Hammer Studio, which was already known at the time for its lurid and, for the 1950s, gory versions of Dracula and Frankenstein. Purist may take issue with the Hammer script (inside my head I was ticking off the points that were faithful to Doyle and what was added by modern writers) but I enjoyed it so much that I wasn’t bothered by any of it. Peter Cushing plays Holmes and Christopher Lee is Sir Henry Baskerville. There has been discussion over whether they should have switched roles or Cushing should have played Stapleton, but that is all moot. It is what it is. The movie immediately grabs the attention by opening directly into a portrayal of the events of a past century that gave rise to the Baskerville Curse. The evil Sir Hugo Baskerville has imprisoned a peasant woman for all of his dissolute friends to share. When she escapes, Sir Hugo pursues her over the moor but, as he catches and kills her, a hound from hell attacks and rips out Sir Hugo’s throat. We then find that this has all been narrated by a visitor to 221B Baker Street to Holmes and Dr. Watson (André Morell). Well, there is much to talk about re: this film and other versions, there is just not enough space on a thread like this to do so. Suffice that this is a worthwhile “Hound” to be seen in conjunction with other productions of the story.



Won’t You Be My Neighbor? / Morgan Neville (2018). When I sat down to this documentary of the life and work of Fred Rogers, I promised myself I wouldn’t cry. That promise didn’t take much effort to keep. The bulk of the film was a sketchy survey of Rogers’ early life, how he got into TV, and how “Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood” was developed. For those who grew up with Mister Rogers or who had children who watched the program, most of this material will be familiar. It is only after he gave up his children’s show in 1975 that his life takes a dark turn. He missed the daily work at the studio. An attempt to develop a show for adults didn’t materialize. He became depressed so returned to make new shows for the Neighborhood. He was also brought down by the nasty turn he saw the country making and of criticism from right-wing commentators that his message that every child was special had created a generation of entitled lazy people who thought everything should be given to them without having to work for it. He was pretty unhappy during his last years but still kept up a busy schedule of speaking and writing, but the movie seems to say that he died thinking that he might have been a failure. I’m sorry I watched it now. Instead of this biography, I recommend instead that you watch the seven minute video titled, “Mr. Rogers Saves PBS.” In 1969, Public Broadcasting was about to have its annual funding cut in half by the Nixon Administration. The Senate Committee headed by a rude and arrogant Sen. John Pastore (D-Rhode Island), who had already made up his mind to push through the cuts, was holding sham hearings but not paying any attention to those testifying in favor of PBS. Not until Fred Rogers took the microphone. What happens next is a miracle. These are seven minutes to be cherished.





The Importance of Being Earnest (2018). A performance recorded Live for movie theaters of Oscar Wilde’s famous play. The show opened in the Summer of 2018 at the Vaudeville Theatre in London. A cast of talented young actors, mostly unknown to film or TV, keep the action moving by treating the text as a true farce by rapid fire speaking of the dialog that lets Wilde’s witty lines pore over the audience like a flood, coming fast and furious, no pauses for laughs. Excluding a couple of Shakespeare plays, “The Importance of Being Earnest” is my favorite comedy. Always a delight. If this plays at a theater near you, don’t miss it.

Most of the cast: Miss Prism, Rev. Chasuble, Jack, Gwendolen, Cecily, and Algy

October Horror Challenge 2018 - Completed - Didn't make my target of 50 but great fun.

Finished Totals - First Time Views 24 - Revisits 20



1. Trilogy of Terror (1975) - Revisit - 8/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0073820/reference
2. The Mummy's Hand (1940) - FTV - 6/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0032818/reference
3. They Came from Beyond Space (1967) - FTV - 3/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0062360/reference
4. The Thing (2011) - Revisit - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0905372/reference
5. Jaws (1975) - Revisit - 10/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0073195/reference
6. Piranha Part Two: The Spawning (1981) - FTV - 3/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0082910/reference
7. The Last Key (2018) - FTV - 5/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt5726086/reference
8. Cult of Chucky (2017) - FTV - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt3280262/reference
9. Screamers (1995) - FTV - 6/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0114367/reference
10. The Cabin in the Woods (2012) - Revisit - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt1259521/reference
11. Revenge of the Creature (1955) - FTV - 6/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0048554/reference
12. Piranha 3D (2010) - Revisit - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0464154/reference
13. The Exorcist: The Version You Have Never Seen (1973) - FTV - 9/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0070047/reference
14. Zombieland (2009) - Revisit - 9/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt1156398/reference
15. Videodrome (1983) - Revisit - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0086541/reference
16. The Mummy's Tomb (1942) - FTV - 6/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0035096/reference
17. Raw (2016) - FTV - 8/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt4954522/reference
18. Shin Gojira (2016) - FTV - 5/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt4262980/reference
19. Hereditary (2018) - FTV - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt7784604/reference
20. The Funhouse (1981) - FTV - 7.5/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0082427/reference
21. The Crazies (2010) - Revisit - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0455407/reference
22. The Uninvited (2009) - FTV - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0815245/reference
23. Rosemary's Baby (1968) - Revisit - 9/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0063522/reference
24. Slumber (2017) - FTV - 5/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt5181852/reference
25. Friday the 13th Part III (1982) - Revisit - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0083972/reference
26. Pyewacket (2017) - FTV - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt5119116/reference
27. The Midnight Man (2016) - FTV - 4/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt5629964/reference
28. The Mummy's Ghost (1944) - FTV - 6/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0037099/reference
29. Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (1985) - FTV - 4/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0089173/reference
30. World War Z (2013) - FTV - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0816711/reference
31. Ils - Them (2006) - FTV - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0465203/reference
32. Mais ne nous délivrez pas du mal (1971) - FTV - 8/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0066040/reference
33. Don't Hang Up (2016) - FTV - 6.5/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt3610746/reference
34. Severance (2006) - Revisit - 9/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0464196/reference
35. The Cottage (2008) - Revisit - 8/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0465430/reference
36. Cat People (1942) - Revisit - 9/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0034587/reference
37. Doghouse (2009) - Revisit - 8/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt1023500/reference
38. Dog Soldiers (2002) - Revisit - 9/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0280609/reference
39. The Descent (2005) - Revisit - 10/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0435625/reference
40. Scream 2 (1997) - Revisit - 8/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0120082/reference
41. Final Destination 2 (2003) - Revisit - 7/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0309593/reference
42. The Woman in Black (2012) - Revisit - 9/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt1596365/reference
43. The Thing (1982) - Revisit - 10/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0084787/reference
44. Frontier(s) (2007) - FTV - 8/10 - www.imdb.com/title/tt0814685/reference

Others

Mud (2012) www.imdb.com/title/tt1935179/reference

Forgot I bought this a couple of years ago, Blu-ray still unopened! Found a couple more as well! Really loved it, though I would have had a different ending by retaining the mystery. Look forward to another viewing next year when I can review it with substance. 8/10

Terrifier (2016)  www.imdb.com/title/tt4281724/reference

Ran out of time to view this on Halloween for the challenge, but with my ever growing unease where clowns are involved I had to watch it whilst I still had my horror head on. It's pretty gruesome stuff to the non slasher horror fan, those in big with the formula will enjoy whilst probably being irritated like myself by the dumbness of character decision making. I understand it's a trait of the genre, but this does smack of laziness by the makers. Baffling ending as well, but it leaves a mark that is not easily washed off. 6/10

Fort Defiance (1951) www.imdb.com/title/tt0043554/reference

Oh Brother!

Fort Defiance is directed by John Rawlins and written by Louis Lantz. It stars Dane Clark, Ben Johnson, Peter Graves and Tracey Roberts. Music is by Paul Sawtell and cinematography by Stanley Cortez.

Plot has Clark as sharp shooting Johnny Tallon, a feared man he may be, but after a dreadful incident in the Civil War he is a wanted man. Upon returning to the family ranch where his blind brother Ned (Graves) resides, he finds one of his pursuers, Ben Shelby (Johnson), has befriended Ned and become more of a brother to Ned than Johnny ever was. With the Indians on the warpath and saloon impresario Dave Parker (Craig Woods) out to kill of the Tallon family, something's got to give...

There's a degree of complexity on show with the writing here, where the family strife and fall out from the Civil War makes for an always interesting viewing. Also refreshing to find that Graves' blind character is not a heart string tugging token, it's a meaty portrayal by Graves, the character not trying to garner sympathy. There's a richness to the key characterisations in general, ensuring that at least when the story treads familiar Westerns pathways (Indian attacks shoehorned in - Roberts' token saloon gal love interest) all outcomes are anticipated with interest.

The location landscapes are gorgeous, which renders the use of Cinecolor as being annoying. The pronounced reds and blues detracting from the natural beauty of the surroundings, though thankfully the print shown on TCM-HD is of a decent quality. The action sequences are only competently staged, but there's enough gun shots and stunt working bodily thunder to perk up the pic, while acting across the board is on the good side of good.

Strong plotting and super scenery help to keep this one above average and thus worth seeking out by Westerns lovers. 6.5/10


The Ugly Duckling (1959) www.imdb.com/title/tt0174303/reference

In the vault of Hammer Film there was an Ugly Duckling.

Thanks to UK Cable channel Talking Pictures, The Ugly Duckling has resurfaced. While it's no hidden gem demanding to be sought out as a critical must, it is however a joy for fans of British cinema with knowledge of such.

Story is a reworking of the Jekyll and Hyde story, with Bernard Bresslaw as Henry Jekll, a descendant of the not so good doctor. Henry is a bumbling buffoon, sweet, amiable and harmless, he does however drive all around him to distraction. Messing about in chemistry Henry transforms into Teddy Hyde, a womanising spiv, a man easy in the company of girls and gangsters alike. Trouble ahead does wait...

It's all very jolly and harmless, the center piece of plotting being a robbery of precious jewels that thrusts Henry/Teddy to the front of things. There's nothing deep on offer here, the dangers of messing with science, personality changes to fit in etc are not explored, this is played for light entertainment and works on those terms.

The dance hall background is firmly of its time, nicely so, with the Joe Loss Orchestra in full effect. While the period flavours are engaging as the rocking 50s close out as the more decadent swinging 60s beckons. The delight for Brit cinema fans here is with the cast, where lining up for some jollification are Jon Pertwee, Reginald Beckwith, Maudie Edwards, Richard Watiss, Michael Ripper, Shelagh Dey and David Lodge all propping up the ever likable Bresslaw. Bonus here is to get a rare look at the adorable Jean Muir, only two film credits when really she should have had more.

The Jekyll & Hyde axis of the story gives way to the jewel robbery in the final third, making this a tad disjointed, and the comedy is gentle and not likely to bring about raucous laughter (though one great line from Pertwee is absolute gold dust). Ultimately this has the ability to cover a compliant film fan for this ilk of cinema with a warm comfort blanket, for it be a time capsule worth opening. 7/10

CHARMED (1998) “Dead Man Dating.” 20TH ANNIVERSARY. A young John Cho makes a guest appearance, as a ghost seeking help from the Halliwells. The emotional climax, with Beth Neilsen Chapman’s “Sand and Water” led to me getting the CD. Paramount DVD.

INSPECTOR GADGET (1983) ”Double Agent”, “Platform of the Opera” “Gone Went the Wind” 35TH ANNIVERSARY

SON OF FRANKENSTEIN (1939) 200TH FRANKENSTEIN ANNIVERSARY The third of the Universal series, and the last for Karloff as the monster. First to use Frank Skinner’s title theme, which I first heard from the HOUSE OF DRACULA trailer and THE MUMMY’S HAND. First saw this on Showtime back in 1990. Universal DVD

FRIENDS (1998) “The One With The Kips.” 20TH ANNIVERSARY. I always liked this episode’s focus on Chandler realizing that he is in a mature relationship with Monica, and that one bad weekend together doesn’t mean a break up. Also Joey finds out. Netflix.

SUPERMAN (1988) “The Hunter/The Runaway.” I believe this is the third ‘Superman Dies!’ in animation (The first was in CHALLENGE OF THE SUPERFRIENDS- which was a hoax- and the second was THE SUPER POWERS TEAM: GALACTIC GUARDIANS- where it turned out to be a trance). Won’t be the last. Warner DVD.

BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN (1935) 200TH FRANKENSTEIN ANNIVERSARY The sequel to FRANKENSTEIN, with Whale, Karloff, and Clive back in the fray, with Elsa Lanchester as Mary Shelley and the Monster’s bride. First saw this on Showtime in 1990. Universal BluRay

MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 (2017) “Avalanche” An episode from the MST3K reboot, this time the 1978 disaster film. Shout DVD.

THE LION IN WINTER (1968) 50TH ANNIVERSARY With my viewing of THE DEVIL’S CROWN, it’s suitable that I have the Anniversary viewing of the Plantagenets’ most famous portrayal with Peter O’Toole (reprising his Henry II from BECKET) and Katherine Hepburn, with newcomers Anthony Hopkins, Timothy Dalton, Nigel Terry, and John Castle. My initial thought about this production was that it was some Biblical epic with Katherine Hepburn resembling the Virgin Mary (ironically enough, a picture of Catherine O’Hara playing Kate as Eleanor- on SCTV’S ‘The Man Who Would Be King of Popes’ had me thinking the same thing). I finally got to see this on my PBS channel around the 1992 Summer Olympics. MGM/UA DVD.

THE CLEOPATRAS (1983) "Episode Five" 35TH ANNIVERSARY And now our Cleopatra’s story begins, with the power struggle between herself and her brother, which she resolves by help of Caesar. Youtube.

JANE EYRE (1983) "Episode Four" 35TH ANNIVERSARY BBC Video DVD

THE CAT AND THE CANARY (1927) Halloween perennial. Image DVD.

THE MONSTER SQUAD (1987) Along with COUNT DUCKULA, this introduced me to the Classic Monster Films. First saw this on HBO back in 1988. Celebrated its 30th Anniversary last year. This year I watched it with my sister to introduce to her two sons. Hulu.

FRANKENSTEIN (1931) 200TH FRANKENSTEIN ANNIVERSARY Following DRACULA, the cementer of the Universal Horror Film Franchise, introducing (to audiences, since he has been in films for a while) Boris Karloff. First saw this one alongside DRACULA and THE WOLF MAN via a present from my uncle. Universal BluRay.

UNIVERSAL HORROR (1998) 20TH ANNIVERSARY This Year. Halloween Perennial. Kevin Brownlow’s documentary on the Universal Horror Franchise, with honorable mentions of the films from Paramount (The Fredric March DR. JEKYLL AND MR HYDE), RKO (KING KONG), and Warner Brothers (MYSTERY OF THE WAX MUSEUM). First saw this on its TCM premiere in the Fall of 1998. Universal BluRay.

FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST (2003) “The Man With the Mechanical Arm” 15TH ANNIVERSARY 5th Episode of the first Anime adaptation of Hiromu Arakawa’s manga series, introducing a character I was very fond of: Major Maes Hughes. Bootleg DVD.

NOAH’S ARK (1928) 90TH ANNIVERSARY. Warner Brothers attempt at a DeMille epic, mixing the Genesis story with a modern day storyline with the same actors. Most infamous for its depiction of the Flood, which killed several extras. First saw bits of this one as part of TNT’s “Silent Night” Marathon on Christmas Eve Night in 1989 (where I first saw the silent BEN-HUR: A TALE OF THE CHRIST) Warner DVD

PLANET OF THE APES (1968) 50TH ANNIVERSARY This Year. The classic science fiction film with a particularly downer ending. It certainly shocked me when I first saw it on the Disney Channel in 1992 (back when the channel showed serious classic films at night). I thought BENEATH OF THE PLANET OF THE APES would redeem the ending. Oh No. ESCAPE FROM THE PLANET OF THE APES. Oh dear No! Fox Video BluRay

THE DEVIL’S CROWN (1978) “Richard Yea or Nay” 40th ANNIVERSARY Michael Byrne’s Richard comes to the throne, with the emphasis on his historically questionable homosexuality.

DRAGON BALL Z: A FINAL LONESOME BATTLE- THE FATHER OF Z WARRIOR SON GOKU WHO CHALLENGED FREIZA (1990) A special (Known as DRAGON BALL Z: THE HISTORY OF BARDOCK: FATHER OF GOKU) made during the Anime Adaptation’s Frieza Saga, fleshing out Goku’s Father. DRAGON BALL Z KAI would use footage as a prologue for its series. The contents would be retconned by Akira Toriyama’s DRAGON BALL MINUS origin story (which will be adapted in the upcoming DRAGON BALL SUPER: BROLY film). First saw this on VHS in 2001, entertained by its clips of the original DRAGON BALL series (not yet available in the US save for the first 14 episodes). That version was the Dub version with rock songs (Sum 41, etc.). This version- watched at Tinseltown- keeps the English but restores the original Japanese Music Score.

DRAGON BALL Z: THE REBIRTH OF FUSION: GOKU AND VEJITA! (1995) The Twelfth DBZ film. Saw this in Tinseltown.

A DIFFERENT WORLD (1988) 30TH ANNIVERSARY “Dream Lover.” The first glimpse of Dwayne and Whitley’s future romance is toyed with in dreams. TV One broadcast on a VHS recording.

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (1998) “Homecoming” 20TH ANNIVERSARY. The first appearance of the Big Bad Mayor Wilkins (Harry Groener). Fox Video DVD.

No classics, but two from this year:
Won't You Be My Neighbor?--Excellent biography of Fred Rogers and his work. For those who loved this documentary, there is an earlier documentary, Fred Rogers: America's Favorite Neighbor (2004), which has a longer running time and covers much of the same material seen in the later film. But you might as well watch 'em both, as you can't get enough of Mister Rogers, and his philosophy is sorely needed these days.

And for Halloween week, a horror movie:
Book Club--a while back, I posted about actors who play roles too young for them, and mentioned how few films there are with actresses who do the same thing. This film is one of those few. Four older women get together for regular discussions
on books they've read for their private book club. They decide to choose the Fifty Shades series, and their lives are--
changed forever! They're all so blown away by the daring sensuality of these books that they all experience some kind of revelation about their relationships with men in their lives!

No. First of all, anyone who's wasted time in reading any of the Fifty Shades books is aware that the most noteworthy
literary achievement about them is that they  succeed in making kinky erotica tedious, which is quite a feat. Even one of those romance paperbacks that used to be sold on the racks of drugstores next to the word search puzzle books has more thrills than this ponderous trilogy. The fact that this is the subject of this group's book discussion should be a giveaway that these women are going to be the usual dullards found in too many modern romantic comedies (I guess that's why they need all that wine; a large part of these movies tends to revolve around people lounging on sofas and drinking wine out of enormous wine glasses).

Candice Bergen plays a divorced judge whose husband ran off with a much younger woman; her adventures in the world of internet dating seem promising. If the movie had stuck with her story, it might have made for a nice little rom-com. Unfortunately, the rest of the movie deals with the romantic exploits of the other three. Mary Steenburgen is disappointed in her lack of a sex life with her husband of many years; this leads to a slew of Viagra jokes. Okay, a bit stale, but the worst is yet to come.
Diane Keaton's character suggests "Annie Hall meets Miss Havisham"--the hair, the slouch, and the girlish goofiness of the Hall character, uncomfortably transferred to a woman in her seventies. This odd look is apparently irresistible to Andy Garcia, a
handsome, sexy, charming, wealthy airline pilot who can easily attract hordes of women in their thirties yet chooses to chase after a woman ten years his senior here (well, she admits to five years). The most terrifying of all is Jane Fonda, who here sports a disturbing resemblance to Skeletor. Her eyes seem to be so tight that she has trouble blinking, she seems to be constantly sucking in her cheeks, and the veins in her arms seem larger than the arms themselves. The premise of all this is that she is some kind of vixen, who endlessly boasts about having a "roster of men," which is why she can't get involved with
Don Johnson. Because, again, Don Johnson can't find any woman besides this pickled self-described femme fatale a decade older than he is. Watch this only if you have the occasional yen for bad movies.

Well done with that huge run of Horror flicks Spike!