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Post by mattgarth on Nov 11, 2018 19:32:27 GMT
Too bad the players don't get to vote on this one … OUR QM would be a shoooooo-in 
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Thanks for your loyal support, Bat -- but Quizmaster Matt of Massachusetts isn't given much of a chance of being this year's recipient of the QSA (Quizmasters Society of America) Lifetime Achievement Award.
The leading candidate is Quizmaster Turk of Tennessee, who finished second in the balloting last year -- although the smart money is on Quizmaster Vinny of Vermont.
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 11, 2018 19:51:07 GMT
-- A brief break in the afternoon action allows for posting a few more additions.
-- This activity has become the leading sport of the convention, even surpassing the popular MindTrap Board Game:
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If he's "McDeere,' it's Cruise
If it's Robards, he's 'Hughes'
When Grant plays 'Burns,' that's News
They gotta be this and that
If it's Russell, she's 'Mame'
If it's Celeste, she's 'Flame'
If it's Field's kid, it's Haim
They gotta be this and that
If not 'Digby,' it's 'Beau'
If not 'Curly,' it's 'Moe'
If not 'Alice,' it's 'Flo'
They gotta be this or that
If he's 'Mitty,' it's Kaye
If she's 'Bonnie,' it's Faye
If he's 'Birnam,' it's Ray
They gotta be this and that
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I hear the cowbell ringing, so it's back to the salt mines.
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 11, 2018 21:21:14 GMT
Quizmaster Ozzie of Ohio just slipped the following entries to me during Quizmaster Wally Wally of Washington's presentation entitled "Sonny Tufts: Misunderstood Genius." Ozzie's submissions have already reached the maximum limit of postings, and he asked me to add them to my own (they're pretty good, too).
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If it's Orson, he's 'Kane'
If he's 'Gailey,' it's Payne
If she's 'Pinky,' it's Crain
They gotta be this and that
If she's 'Lorene,' it's Reed
If Michael B, he's 'Creed'
If Mortimer, he's 'Sneed'
They gotta be this and that
If he's 'Thornhill,' it's Grant
If it's 'Audrey,' a Plant
A Filmmaker, Van Sant
They gotta be this and that
If he's Chaplin, a Tramp
If she's Theda, a Vamp
If he's Beery, the Champ
They gotta be this and that
________________________________________________________________
Yes Wally, I'm listening -- you just said that Sonny was hanged in THE VIRGINIAN ... see, I am paying attention.
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 11, 2018 21:56:42 GMT
-- Oh great, now more of the QMs are sending entries my way.
-- I thought I had posted a few, but these guys have far exceeded mine to send home.
-- This set is from Quizmaster Irving of Indiana:
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If he's Massey, it's 'Abe'
If he's Bendix, it's 'Babe'
If Spartacus, a Slave
They gotta be this and that
If it's 'Gittes,' he's Jack
If he's Duvall, it's 'Mac'
If he's 'Bickle,' a Hack
They gotta be this and that
If 'Atticus,' he's Peck
If it's Peter, he's Breck
If 'Hannibal,' he's 'Lec'
They gotta be this and that
If it's 'Matthew,' he's 'Garth'
If it's 'Vader,' he's 'Darth'
If it's Moorehead, she's 'Parth'
They gotta be this and that
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You're welcome, Irv -- and thanks for the 'Garth' reference
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Post by BATouttaheck on Nov 11, 2018 23:54:15 GMT
Those QMs are really coming up with great epic poetry … very impressive !
Will you be presenting a paper at the symposium this year ?
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 0:34:15 GMT
My Keynote address was presented at the Convention's opening, Bat.
The subject: "Creative Ways to Shift Blame When There's a Gaffe"
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Post by BATouttaheck on Nov 12, 2018 0:58:47 GMT
Not that you personally have any experience with that particular subject !
I suppose you had Lydia do some on-line researching for you since she knows that Google is Indeed Our Friend ! .
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 2:35:37 GMT
Before the night ends, sneaking in another round:
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If he's 'Sefton,' it's Bill
If he's 'Ali,' it's Will
If he's Dick Powell, it's 'Phil'
They've gotta be this and that
If he's Mitchum, it's 'Max'
If he's 'Hugo,' it's 'Drax'
If a Planet, K-PAX
They've gotta be this and that
If it's Baxter, she's 'Eve'
If it's Greg Peck, he's 'Cleve'
If it's Ullmann, she's Liv
They've gotta be this or that
If he's 'Hunting,' it's Matt
If it's McCrea, he's 'Bat'
If it's Greenstreet, he's fat
They gotta be this or that
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Enough for the day -- away to woo the Goddess of Slumber ... and then go to sleep
****************************************************************************
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 7:51:27 GMT
Conference winding down, only a few lyrics still lingering:
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If it's Bogie, he's 'Spade'
If it's Glenn Ford, he's 'Wade'
If it's Angie, she's 'Cade'
They gotta be this and that
If she's 'Cleo,' it's Liz
If it's Dailey, he's 'Diz'
If it's Morgan, the Wiz
They gotta be this and that
If he plays 'Bond,' he's Moore
If he's 'Alfie,' Jude Law
If she's Dottie, Lamour
They gotta be this and that
If it's Steiger, he's 'Judd'
If it's Baxter, he's 'Mudd'
If he's 'Arthur,' it's Dud
They gotta be this and that
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Countdown is on for the grande Convention finale
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 17:09:58 GMT
Catching kitchen duty on this last Convention day -- they really make you sing for your supper and bus tables for your breakfast.
Starting to pack up the playful lyrics that have caught on like wildfire here:
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If she's 'The Ma', it's Brie
If she's 'Gidget,' it's Dee
If he's 'Shelleen,' it's Lee
They gotta be this and that
If it's Muni, 'Juarez'
De Niro's Priest, he's 'Des'
If Freddie March, he's 'Prez'
They gotta be this and that
If he's 'Rooster,' it's Jeff
If we're insured, it's 'Neff'
If played by Cliff, he's 'Hef'
They've gotta be this and that
If it's Scofield, he's 'Mark'
If it's Crawford, he's 'Stark'
If he's 'Popeye', a Narc
They've gotta be this and that
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Gotta go -- more dishes to clear
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 17:37:20 GMT
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 21:19:12 GMT
It's shaping up to be a wild and crazy finish to the QM Convention.
Lifetime Achievement Award winner to be announced tonight.
Rounding up the remaining lingering lyrics:
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If he's 'Lincoln,' it's Dan
If it's Marlon, he's 'Stan'
If it's STREETCAR, Kazan
They've gotta be this and that
If she's 'Von Trapp,' Julie
If he's 'Dave's' Pop, Dooley
If John Qualen, 'Muley'
They've gotta be this and that
If 'Father Chuck,' it's Bing
If James Arness, THE THING
If Merciless, he's 'Ming'
They gotta be this and that
If it's the Duke, he's 'Spig'
If it's Yaphet, he's 'Big'
If he's 'Porky', a Pig
They gotta be this and that
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Away now to set the tables for tonight's gathering -- this kitchen duty really sucks
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 22:05:16 GMT
Fellow Kitchen Mate QM Kirby from Kansas asked me to slip these in -- he's over his posting limit:
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If it's Hoffman, 'Lenny'
If he's 'Tura,' Benny
If Reginald, Denny
They gotta be this and that
If he's the King, it's Yul
If Michael Caine, he's 'Bruhl'
If he's McQueen, he's Cool
They gotta be this and that
If he's 'Cromwell,' Harris
If it's Rockwell, 'Barris'
If he's 'Mongo', Karras
They've gotta be this and that
If he's Bogarde, it's Dirk
If he's 'Van Gogh,' it's Kirk
If he helms Soaps, it's Sirk
They've gotta be this and that
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You're welcome, Kirby -- and don't forget your 'Lifetime' vote tonight
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Post by BATouttaheck on Nov 12, 2018 22:13:13 GMT
this kitchen duty really sucks
Welcome to the wonderful world of interning mattgarth !  Finners crossed for the Lifetime Voting tonight ! |
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 12, 2018 22:34:56 GMT
Bat -- the last time you had Intern duty, Bill Clinton was President!
Keep those 'finners' crossed tonight.
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Post by jervistetch on Nov 13, 2018 0:18:56 GMT
If it's Stanwyck, it's Phyllis
If it's Holden, Joe Gillis
John McClane? That's Bruce Willis
They've gotta be this or that
If it's Lahr, he's a Lion
If it's Lyndon, it's Ryan
If it's Tootie, O'Brien
They gotta be this and that
If she's Spacek, she's Carrie
If it's Dana, it's Derry
Christian Szell? Must be Larry
They've gotta be this or that
If she Audrey, she's Holly
If she's Debbie, she's Molly
If she's Barbra, she's Dolly
They gotta be this and that
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 13, 2018 0:23:22 GMT
Jervis -- you stole my thread!
(geez, and they are pretty good too)
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Post by jervistetch on Nov 13, 2018 0:44:52 GMT
Not trying to steal your crown, Lord Garth.
It took me 3 days to assemble this.
You're cranking them out like chocolate kisses at the Hershey factory.
And they're just as delicious.
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Post by mattgarth on Nov 13, 2018 1:15:53 GMT
OK, wise guy -- this means war!
To paraphrase the final statement of Editor 'Connell' (James Gleason) in MEET JOHN DOE --
"There ya are, Jervis -- a Garth lyric! Try and beat that!"
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If it's Gable, he's 'Rhett'
If it's Viv Leigh, 'Scarlett'
If she's 'The Rose,' it's Bette
They've gotta be this and that
If it's by Clift, it's 'Freud'
If it's Bridges, he's Lloyd
If it's Renee, she's 'Boyd'
They've gotta be this and that
If she's 'Cathy,' it's Merle
If it's Jen Jones, she's 'Pearl'
If he's 'Rufus,' it's Burl
It's gotta be this and that
If 'Sabrina,' Audrey
If KLUTE's Fonda, she's 'Bree'
If Jack Palance, 'Curly'
They've gotta be this and that
_______________________________________________________________________
As eloquently stated by Sam Spade: "When you're lyriced, you'll take it and like it!"
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Post by jervistetch on Nov 13, 2018 14:15:19 GMT
Lonely Bogie is Dixon
Tony Hopkins is Nixon
Meryl Streep? Karen Blixen
They've gotta be this and that
Alan Rickman is Snape
Johnny Depp, Gilbert Grape
Maurice Evans? An ape
They gotta be this or that
Rosemary is Mia
Ms. Wood? She's Maria
The Lonely Lady is Pia (sorry)
They've gotta be this or that
If she's Hunter, she's Stella
If he's Dracula, Bela
Ray Liotta? Goodfella
They gotta be this and that
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