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Post by Deleted on May 7, 2019 19:53:19 GMT
... Stop stereotyping your own people.
What I mean by that is they assume all gay men are feminine, sassy, fasion, makeup queers.
By promoting your community that way, you alienate young boys who love sports, fishing, boxing, hunting, and are manly.
So what happens is you have a 16 year old boy who is a jock, masculine, loves everything a 'straight' boy likes but is homosexual. So they hide who they are because they don't want to associate with 'that' persona.
Same goes for lesbians. There are feminine lipstick lesbians who love feminine things, girly magazines, etc... But it's always perceived as macho Butch lesbos.
So you end up breeding a culture of self loathing gays who hide in the closet, bully the stereotype gays and even get married but secretly hate their life.
If gays would be portrayed as regular guys who love sports and hunt/fish, can be macho too just attracted to guys, then it seems more normal. Same for feminine lesbians.
The problem is, when you watch something for gay people it's all about queer guys who talk and act like women. It's off putting for some gay guys because they don't Identity with it.
Just a thought I had while hearing a gay kid talk about being bullied by a jock and finding out later in life he himself was gay and that's why he bullied him.
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Post by gameboy on May 8, 2019 1:33:41 GMT
There is a difference between the "LGBTQ+" goon squad and real gay people. They've politically aligned themselves with the anti-gender movement. Homosexuality is a celebration of gender but they don't get it. I mean they've put that 'T' in there as if transgender has anything to do with my life as a gay man. If you extend it out it's now LGBTQIA. The 'A' stands for a mental illness known as asexuality. The movement was supposed to be about sexual freedom. Now it's not only anti-gender, it's anti-sex.
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Post by Harmless elf on May 8, 2019 1:46:36 GMT
There is a difference between the "LGBTQ+" good squad and real gay people. They've politically aligned themselves with the anti-gender movement. Homosexuality is a celebration of gender but they don't get it. I mean they've put that 'T' in there as if transgender has anything to do with my life as a gay man. If you extend it out it's now LGBTQI A. The 'A' stands for a mental illness known as asexuality. The movement was supposed to be about sexual freedom. Now it's not only anti-gender, it's anti-sex. By the time it's over they'll have every letter of the alphabet |
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Post by gameboy on May 8, 2019 2:51:08 GMT
There is a difference between the "LGBTQ+" goon squad* and real gay people. They've politically aligned themselves with the anti-gender movement. Homosexuality is a celebration of gender but they don't get it. I mean they've put that 'T' in there as if transgender has anything to do with my life as a gay man. If you extend it out it's now LGBTQI A. The 'A' stands for a mental illness known as asexuality. The movement was supposed to be about sexual freedom. Now it's not only anti-gender, it's anti-sex. By the time it's over they'll have every letter of the alphabet * I meant "goon squad". The whole thing is a farce. I also find the term "gay" offensive. I don't walk around with a silly smile on my face all day.
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Post by dirtypillows on May 8, 2019 3:10:21 GMT
... Stop stereotyping your own people. What I mean by that is they assume all gay men are feminine, sassy, fasion, makeup queers. By promoting your community that way, you alienate young boys who love sports, fishing, boxing, hunting, and are manly. So what happens is you have a 16 year old boy who is a jock, masculine, loves everything a 'straight' boy likes but is homosexual. So they hide who they are because they don't want to associate with 'that' persona. Same goes for lesbians. There are feminine lipstick lesbians who love feminine things, girly magazines, etc... But it's always perceived as macho Butch lesbos. So you end up breeding a culture of self loathing gays who hide in the closet, bully the stereotype gays and even get married but secretly hate their life. If gays would be portrayed as regular guys who love sports and hunt/fish, can be macho too just attracted to guys, then it seems more normal. Same for feminine lesbians. The problem is, when you watch something for gay people it's all about queer guys who talk and act like women. It's off putting for some gay guys because they don't Identity with it. Just a thought I had while hearing a gay kid talk about being bullied by a jock and finding out later in life he himself was gay and that's why he bullied him. Life's tough all over, pal.
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Post by Toasted Cheese on May 8, 2019 14:35:38 GMT
I often wonder why this LGBTQIA.......whatever the f<>k it is supposed to represent, thinks that ALL homosexuals are aligned with this cause and then breeders think that anyone who isn't straight is a part of this community, yet where is this community to be found? Is there a 'straight' community to be found? I thought community was supposed to be diverse and representative of the whole of society and not compartmentalized and then shove those that don't fit the ideal of a 'normal' mould into something that ultimately means not one of us.  As gameboy has stated, homosexuality is a celebration and endorsement of the singular gender. There is NO fluidity in gender and T is not a sexuality either. Bisexuality doesn't even exist, unless a person is having sex with 2 other people of both genders at the same time. |
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Post by Toasted Cheese on May 8, 2019 14:38:06 GMT
By the time it's over they'll have every letter of the alphabet * I meant "goon squad". The whole thing is a farce. I also find the term "gay" offensive. I don't walk around with a silly smile on my face all day. Unfortunately, we are stuck with "gay" to appease the dense hets and then they then tell homos that they find it offensive to call a gay person a homo or queer.
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Post by Stammerhead on May 8, 2019 15:03:35 GMT
I fail to understand why anyone wants to be taken seriously.  |
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Post by rachelcarson1953 on May 8, 2019 16:44:03 GMT
* I meant "goon squad". The whole thing is a farce. I also find the term "gay" offensive. I don't walk around with a silly smile on my face all day. Unfortunately, we are stuck with "gay" to appease the dense hets and then they then tell homos that they find it offensive to call a gay person a homo or queer. Is there a word that you would prefer to be called? It's been a long time since I've had a lot of contact with the community, so I am asking sincerely. Back in the 1990's, they were a large part of my social and professional contacts, but when I changed jobs, I had less contact.
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Post by lenlenlen1 on May 8, 2019 16:55:42 GMT
... Stop stereotyping your own people. What I mean by that is they assume all gay men are feminine, sassy, fasion, makeup queers. By promoting your community that way, you alienate young boys who love sports, fishing, boxing, hunting, and are manly. So what happens is you have a 16 year old boy who is a jock, masculine, loves everything a 'straight' boy likes but is homosexual. So they hide who they are because they don't want to associate with 'that' persona. Same goes for lesbians. There are feminine lipstick lesbians who love feminine things, girly magazines, etc... But it's always perceived as macho Butch lesbos. So you end up breeding a culture of self loathing gays who hide in the closet, bully the stereotype gays and even get married but secretly hate their life. If gays would be portrayed as regular guys who love sports and hunt/fish, can be macho too just attracted to guys, then it seems more normal. Same for feminine lesbians. The problem is, when you watch something for gay people it's all about queer guys who talk and act like women. It's off putting for some gay guys because they don't Identity with it. Just a thought I had while hearing a gay kid talk about being bullied by a jock and finding out later in life he himself was gay and that's why he bullied him. Are YOU a part of the LGBTQ community? If not, then you cant say what they should or shouldn't do. Let them figure themselves out, and you mind your business.
Being gay isn't about conforming to what you want. Its about figuring out what they want to be.
They're not telling you how you should be. Imagine if they did? I think you'd have a strong word or two in response, no?
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Post by Deleted on May 8, 2019 17:30:34 GMT
... Stop stereotyping your own people. What I mean by that is they assume all gay men are feminine, sassy, fasion, makeup queers. By promoting your community that way, you alienate young boys who love sports, fishing, boxing, hunting, and are manly. So what happens is you have a 16 year old boy who is a jock, masculine, loves everything a 'straight' boy likes but is homosexual. So they hide who they are because they don't want to associate with 'that' persona. Same goes for lesbians. There are feminine lipstick lesbians who love feminine things, girly magazines, etc... But it's always perceived as macho Butch lesbos. So you end up breeding a culture of self loathing gays who hide in the closet, bully the stereotype gays and even get married but secretly hate their life. If gays would be portrayed as regular guys who love sports and hunt/fish, can be macho too just attracted to guys, then it seems more normal. Same for feminine lesbians. The problem is, when you watch something for gay people it's all about queer guys who talk and act like women. It's off putting for some gay guys because they don't Identity with it. Just a thought I had while hearing a gay kid talk about being bullied by a jock and finding out later in life he himself was gay and that's why he bullied him. Are YOU a part of the LGBTQ community? If not, then you cant say what they should or shouldn't do. Let them figure themselves out, and you mind your business.
Being gay isn't about conforming to what you want. Its about figuring out what they want to be.
They're not telling you how you should be. Imagine if they did? I think you'd have a strong word or two in response, no?
That kind of thinking is what I'm talking about. Trying to put people in a box is wrong. I am a heterosexual white male who loves sports, hunting, fishing, boxing etc... But I have a friend from H.S. on my old basketball team who turned out to be gay. He had more in common with me than he did a makeup wearing, feminine, theatre singer etc... My point is, that ONE thing doesn't define who you are and how you act. And this LBGTQ+ community puts labels on people and puts them in a box. It makes people like my old basketball teammate feel alienated. |
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Post by lenlenlen1 on May 8, 2019 19:11:49 GMT
Are YOU a part of the LGBTQ community? If not, then you cant say what they should or shouldn't do. Let them figure themselves out, and you mind your business.
Being gay isn't about conforming to what you want. Its about figuring out what they want to be.
They're not telling you how you should be. Imagine if they did? I think you'd have a strong word or two in response, no?
That kind of thinking is what I'm talking about. Trying to put people in a box is wrong. I am a heterosexual white male who loves sports, hunting, fishing, boxing etc... But I have a friend from H.S. on my old basketball team who turned out to be gay. He had more in common with me than he did a makeup wearing, feminine, theatre singer etc... My point is, that ONE thing doesn't define who you are and how you act. And this LBGTQ+ community puts labels on people and puts them in a box. It makes people like my old basketball teammate feel alienated. What kind of thinking? The kind of thinking where I respect them enough for them to make their own decisions? You mean that kind of thinking? 
What made your friend in H.S. feel alienated was that he knew that if he came out the hetero kids would have made fun of him for it. You and I may not have, and I commend you for that, but you know as well as I do that most of the other "fellas" would have. Its not his own community he's feeling persecution from. Its ours. (also, most kids in H.S. who are gay are still trying to figure it all out themselves, so you're friend almost certainly hadn't figured it all out yet either.)
You're trying to turn the tables and say "they're the ones that are doing the thing that's creating the problem!" Nope. Nice try. They're different from us and that's okay.
Part of what makes them hard to understand to us heteros is that they display many different attributes. Some are "macho" as you say, and some are very flamboyant. But its not up to them to change who they evolve into because some of their attributes bother you/us.
Its up to us to accept them as they are whether they present themselves to us as macho, flamboyant, or covered in green paint with sparkles all over them. If you don't find those attributes acceptable then just walk away. But its not up to us to tell them how they should be. I was born and raised in NYC, believe me I seen all kinds!
Also, this notion you have that they're the ones that put labels on people is quite inaccurate. My experience has been that its us heteros who want to quantify them. They really don't give a fuck. They just want to be themselves.
Live and let live 
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Post by Toasted Cheese on May 10, 2019 0:05:57 GMT
Unfortunately, we are stuck with "gay" to appease the dense hets and then they then tell homos that they find it offensive to call a gay person a homo or queer. Is there a word that you would prefer to be called? It's been a long time since I've had a lot of contact with the community, so I am asking sincerely. Back in the 1990's, they were a large part of my social and professional contacts, but when I changed jobs, I had less contact. I prefer homo, if I am being referred to or identified by a sexuality. My main point rachel was, that I am not a part of this LGBTQIA thing though, just because I am not sexually attracted to women. It is all one community out there and this thing does not even really exist. Where is it, as opposed to the 'straight' community? Straight people and gay people are everywhere, around every corner, in every street, in every store. How do we even know if someone is bisexual? Just because they are with someone of the different sex, or same sex, doesn't mean they aren't sexually attracted to the other.
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Post by rachelcarson1953 on May 10, 2019 1:06:40 GMT
Is there a word that you would prefer to be called? It's been a long time since I've had a lot of contact with the community, so I am asking sincerely. Back in the 1990's, they were a large part of my social and professional contacts, but when I changed jobs, I had less contact. I prefer homo, if I am being referred to or identified by a sexuality. My main point rachel was, that I am not a part of this LGBTQIA thing though, just because I am not sexually attracted to women. It is all one community out there and this thing does not even really exist. Where is it, as opposed to the 'straight' community? Straight people and gay people are everywhere, around every corner, in every street, in every store. How do we even know if someone is bisexual? Just because they are with someone of the different sex, or same sex, doesn't mean they aren't sexually attracted to the other. Back in the 1990's, in the USA, it was a separate, and secretive community, because there was discrimination, and during the AIDS crisis there was fear. I was fortunate to be one of the few heteros to be trusted, so I saw an amazing community of support. I know you live in Australia; perhaps you have never seen the HBO movie "And the Band Played On" - it depicts the conflict during that time fairly accurately. Since that issue has passed and most intelligent people understand that HIV doesn't care about gender, the stigma has lifted. According to the scientists who studied the 'outbreak', it actually gained it's foothold in the IV drug using community first, but those folks weren't a cohesive group demanding that the Government take action along with the medial community. It's been a long time since I have been a part of those tight-knit support groups; the world has changed and my world is that of a small, rural community. Anyone in my town who is 'different' has fled to the nearby large metropolitan city. So I've had little interaction with anyone who isn't a white, straight, church-going farmer. Only when I am in the medical community do I have contact with any diversity, including race. Back in the day, some of my closest friends were gays and lesbians. It was a different time. I spend most of my time now with retired "crazy cat ladies" in the cat rescue group I volunteer with. But thank you for updating me on the current vocabulary. To me, we are all just human beings.
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Post by Eλευθερί on May 10, 2019 2:03:01 GMT
yawn
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Post by Toasted Cheese on May 11, 2019 9:09:29 GMT
I prefer homo, if I am being referred to or identified by a sexuality. My main point rachel was, that I am not a part of this LGBTQIA thing though, just because I am not sexually attracted to women. It is all one community out there and this thing does not even really exist. Where is it, as opposed to the 'straight' community? Straight people and gay people are everywhere, around every corner, in every street, in every store. How do we even know if someone is bisexual? Just because they are with someone of the different sex, or same sex, doesn't mean they aren't sexually attracted to the other. Back in the 1990's, in the USA, it was a separate, and secretive community, because there was discrimination, and during the AIDS crisis there was fear. I was fortunate to be one of the few heteros to be trusted, so I saw an amazing community of support. I know you live in Australia; perhaps you have never seen the HBO movie "And the Band Played On" - it depicts the conflict during that time fairly accurately. Since that issue has passed and most intelligent people understand that HIV doesn't care about gender, the stigma has lifted. According to the scientists who studied the 'outbreak', it actually gained it's foothold in the IV drug using community first, but those folks weren't a cohesive group demanding that the Government take action along with the medial community. It's been a long time since I have been a part of those tight-knit support groups; the world has changed and my world is that of a small, rural community. Anyone in my town who is 'different' has fled to the nearby large metropolitan city. So I've had little interaction with anyone who isn't a white, straight, church-going farmer. Only when I am in the medical community do I have contact with any diversity, including race. Back in the day, some of my closest friends were gays and lesbians. It was a different time. I spend most of my time now with retired "crazy cat ladies" in the cat rescue group I volunteer with. But thank you for updating me on the current vocabulary. To me, we are all just human beings. I have seen And The Band Played On several times Rachel. It got a cinema release where I was living. Excellent film!
There have always been gay hang outs, bars etc, but it is only perceived as secretive if you don't know where they are. Once you do, it is no longer a secret. People wouldn't have been actively seeking them out, unless they wanted too. Just as people don't actively seek out any other type of hang out or bar, which may pander to certain demographics, unless by chance or they have an intention too.
Say in an Irish Bar in NY city for example, there may be a large contingency of Irish people hanging out there and they would be people of hetero, homo or even both sexuality persuasion. Most people are going to claim straight before gay and I doubt if they are bi, most are going to admit to it. This could be considered predominantly an Irish community, but everything is community and sexuality is moot.
I like how you have commented on the term 'support groups' and these can be for any reason within the collective community. It is the compartmentalizing that is condescending, when it is promoted that people who aren't straight, are suddenly lumped into this LGBTQI community thing which is a fallacy and contradiction in terms. Yes, we are all humans, or even earthlings.
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Post by Deleted on May 13, 2019 7:45:57 GMT
Back in the 1990's, in the USA, it was a separate, and secretive community, because there was discrimination, and during the AIDS crisis there was fear. I was fortunate to be one of the few heteros to be trusted, so I saw an amazing community of support. I know you live in Australia; perhaps you have never seen the HBO movie "And the Band Played On" - it depicts the conflict during that time fairly accurately. Since that issue has passed and most intelligent people understand that HIV doesn't care about gender, the stigma has lifted. According to the scientists who studied the 'outbreak', it actually gained it's foothold in the IV drug using community first, but those folks weren't a cohesive group demanding that the Government take action along with the medial community. It's been a long time since I have been a part of those tight-knit support groups; the world has changed and my world is that of a small, rural community. Anyone in my town who is 'different' has fled to the nearby large metropolitan city. So I've had little interaction with anyone who isn't a white, straight, church-going farmer. Only when I am in the medical community do I have contact with any diversity, including race. Back in the day, some of my closest friends were gays and lesbians. It was a different time. I spend most of my time now with retired "crazy cat ladies" in the cat rescue group I volunteer with. But thank you for updating me on the current vocabulary. To me, we are all just human beings. I have seen And The Band Played On several times Rachel. It got a cinema release where I was living. Excellent film!
There have always been gay hang outs, bars etc, but it is only perceived as secretive if you don't know where they are. Once you do, it is no longer a secret. People wouldn't have been actively seeking them out, unless they wanted too. Just as people don't actively seek out any other type of hang out or bar, which may pander to certain demographics, unless by chance or they have an intention too.
My Wifey and I went to a Lesbian bar last year 'cause one of our friends was meeting somebody there and didn't want to go alone and I was surprised by the large number of women that were there and I got hit on multiple times and my Wifey was very jealous  and it is usually her that gets hit on the most when we go out but it is by men and I get hit on by more women now than I ever have and a woman who lives in the street behind us flirting with me when I was taking our dogs for a walk one day and while I would never cheat on my Wifey 'cause I have loved her for as long as I can remember and we have been through hell together I like being hit on by women and it is different than being hit on by guys.
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Post by Toasted Cheese on May 13, 2019 12:25:14 GMT
I have seen And The Band Played On several times Rachel. It got a cinema release where I was living. Excellent film!
There have always been gay hang outs, bars etc, but it is only perceived as secretive if you don't know where they are. Once you do, it is no longer a secret. People wouldn't have been actively seeking them out, unless they wanted too. Just as people don't actively seek out any other type of hang out or bar, which may pander to certain demographics, unless by chance or they have an intention too.
My Wifey and I went to a Lesbian bar last year 'cause one of our friends was meeting somebody there and didn't want to go alone and I was surprised by the large number of women that were there and I got hit on multiple times and my Wifey was very jealous and it is usually her that gets hit on the most when we go out but it is by men and I get hit on by more women now than I ever have and a woman who lives in the street behind us flirting with me when I was taking our dogs for a walk one day and while I would never cheat on my Wifey 'cause I have loved her for as long as I can remember and we have been through hell together I like being hit on by women and it is different than being hit on by guys. Technology and online hook up dating sites have made things easier as well. Google can find people and places for you. I agree, it was more hidden, but it would have also depended on where one lived too. A larger city would have had more haunts. People are slowly getting more educated and having to learn that homosexuality is just as much a part of life and society, as heterosexuality. If people want to see it as un-natural or deviant, that is their s<>t to deal with and ignorance.
Nice how you have people hitting on you and you don't mind this. You and Bec must have a lot of allure.... 
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Post by Toasted Cheese on May 13, 2019 12:26:39 GMT
Is that yawn in recognition of boring hets? 
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Post by Vodkie on May 13, 2019 12:41:41 GMT
I just want the lgbtq letters rearranged to QGTBL
LGBT sounds too close to BLT and it makes me hungry for bacon!
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