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Post by tristramshandy on Nov 15, 2019 23:31:59 GMT
Not trying to outdo any of you, but it's even worse when you talk for a living. I'm a professor, so I'm constantly talking at work - - the last thing that I want to do as soon as I get home is talk some more.
The thing is - - my wife is a teacher, and she does want to talk some more right when she gets home.
I'm a better husband on weekends and during the summer.
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Post by FrankSobotka1514 on Nov 15, 2019 23:43:42 GMT
Not trying to outdo any of you, but it's even worse when you talk for a living. I'm a professor, so I'm constantly talking at work - - the last thing that I want to do as soon as I get home is talk some more. The thing is - - my wife is a teacher, and she does want to talk some more right when she gets home. I'm a better husband on weekends and during the summer. Back in my retail days I managed a video store that had a separate ice cream counter in it. Customers would be like “You are so lucky you work here, you can have ice cream any time!” A) There’s only so much ice cream one can eat every day, and B) if you knew the people who worked the ice cream counter and saw behind the counter you’d never eat another scoop of it. This is a metaphor for these after-work conversations. My wife constantly tells me I’m much cooler to be around on Fridays and Saturdays. Here’s a little secret - she is too. |
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Post by Surly on Nov 16, 2019 0:22:20 GMT
Every once in a while, it's important for us to embrace the things we all share in life. Yeah, we all love sports (or at least, a sport) which is why we're here in the first place, but what else is there? Look, I love my wife, you love your wife, we all love our wives. But the reality is that when I get home from work and she asks me how my day was, no matter how awful or great it was, my answer is invariably some sort of half-response because I'm tired and just need to veg for 30 minutes and let the stress wash off me while I do a peloton ride, or walk the dog, or do anything that doesn't require affirmative brain function. On the other hand, when I ask how her day was, I get a 30 minute diatribe about the women she works with and their highly dysfunctional inter-personal relationships. Every. Single. Day.  To be honest, we get along fantastically and really don't fight at all, but this is the one thing that I just can't stand. I don't know why it bothers me as much as it does, and I know it's stupid so I just sit there and do my best to act interested, hoping that she won't ask me a question that would require some sort of recollection of what she previously told me during one of these episodes. Getting back to the point of this thread, my understanding is that this phenomenon is universal among married couples but who knows. Anyone else experience this or some derivative of this?  I... was married. But long enough to understand this stuff. So let me school you a little bit on this, pal. This basically comes down to a difference between men and women. Us guys want anything that will make us forget about what stressed us out. Some exercise. Walk the dog. Watch a game. Some nookie with the wife. A good movie. A good drink. You get the picture. But women... they want to be heard. They don’t care if you have answers or solutions. They just want you to be a sounding board. And if you’re not. Uh oh. So this is when you multitask, pal. Just nod, agree, and listen just enough to pick on the important points. And when she asks you how you feel about it, just tell her you totally agree and you’ve got her back. But try to pick up on a few important points because she might quiz you just to check if you were really invested. |
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Post by sdm3 on Nov 16, 2019 3:00:08 GMT
I’m usually pretty content to listen to her (I know, la di da right?) as long as I don’t really need to participate all that much. Obviously I’m tired at the end of the day and don’t want to talk a lot. Plus I have to admit that I’m sometimes occupied doing something else while only half-listening, so in lieu of responding verbally I’ll sometimes give a mix of positive “hmm” grunts and negative “hmmm” grunts, depending on which is more appropriate. Once I gave a positive grunt when what she’d said actually called for a negative grunt, exposing the fact that I hadn’t really been listening. She was not impressed.
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Post by klawrencio79 on Nov 16, 2019 19:27:46 GMT
Every once in a while, it's important for us to embrace the things we all share in life. Yeah, we all love sports (or at least, a sport) which is why we're here in the first place, but what else is there? Look, I love my wife, you love your wife, we all love our wives. But the reality is that when I get home from work and she asks me how my day was, no matter how awful or great it was, my answer is invariably some sort of half-response because I'm tired and just need to veg for 30 minutes and let the stress wash off me while I do a peloton ride, or walk the dog, or do anything that doesn't require affirmative brain function. On the other hand, when I ask how her day was, I get a 30 minute diatribe about the women she works with and their highly dysfunctional inter-personal relationships. Every. Single. Day. To be honest, we get along fantastically and really don't fight at all, but this is the one thing that I just can't stand. I don't know why it bothers me as much as it does, and I know it's stupid so I just sit there and do my best to act interested, hoping that she won't ask me a question that would require some sort of recollection of what she previously told me during one of these episodes. Getting back to the point of this thread, my understanding is that this phenomenon is universal among married couples but who knows. Anyone else experience this or some derivative of this? I... was married. But long enough to understand this stuff. So let me school you a little bit on this, pal. This basically comes down to a difference between men and women. Us guys want anything that will make us forget about what stressed us out. Some exercise. Walk the dog. Watch a game. Some nookie with the wife. A good movie. A good drink. You get the picture. But women... they want to be heard. They don’t care if you have answers or solutions. They just want you to be a sounding board. And if you’re not. Uh oh. So this is when you multitask, pal. Just nod, agree, and listen just enough to pick on the important points. And when she asks you how you feel about it, just tell her you totally agree and you’ve got her back. But try to pick up on a few important points because she might quiz you just to check if you were really invested. Wow, thanks for enlightening the rest of us, chief.
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Post by Surly on May 13, 2021 1:29:07 GMT
I... was married. But long enough to understand this stuff. So let me school you a little bit on this, pal. This basically comes down to a difference between men and women. Us guys want anything that will make us forget about what stressed us out. Some exercise. Walk the dog. Watch a game. Some nookie with the wife. A good movie. A good drink. You get the picture. But women... they want to be heard. They don’t care if you have answers or solutions. They just want you to be a sounding board. And if you’re not. Uh oh. So this is when you multitask, pal. Just nod, agree, and listen just enough to pick on the important points. And when she asks you how you feel about it, just tell her you totally agree and you’ve got her back. But try to pick up on a few important points because she might quiz you just to check if you were really invested. Wow, thanks for enlightening the rest of us, chief. That’s what I’m here for, rookie. |
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Post by _ on May 13, 2021 4:11:16 GMT
Wait... you're supposed to listen to them?
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Post by Rey Kahuka on May 13, 2021 12:00:59 GMT
Wait... you're supposed to listen to them? You're supposed to act like you're listening.
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