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Post by lenlenlen1 on Oct 12, 2021 14:18:15 GMT
Are there different levels of cheating? Only in that the deeper you get the worse it gets, but all levels are bad/wrong. You don't get credit for doing a it one time as opposed to ten times. Cheating is cheating. If you're grading there is no D- or F+. Its all F. Let me ask you this? Would you care if your wife/husband screwed around once less than if she/he did it ten times? She/he still cheated! And having done it once they will do it again, given the right circumstances. You can forgive if you want to, that's up to you, but don't give it levels of better or worse. Cheating is cheating, and you will always know that your significant other is a cheater.
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Post by PreachCaleb on Oct 13, 2021 13:24:15 GMT
Nope. I'm placing importance on health and safety. It's a great rate if the marriage is full of lies, deceit, and mistrust. Males are also sapient by nature. They can make choices and are aware of their consequences. Don't assume I'm using some book for my morality. I was discussing health and diseases. I don't follow old books for information on that. That's up to the couple to decide on. Bullshit. The issue here is not "health and safety". It's whether or not sexual exclusivity is a necessary requirement of a healthy relationship. That's a MENTALLY HEALTHY relationship. Indeed, I think a hysterical obsession with sexual exclusivity may be a sign of neurotic entitlement of ownership over a partner's body.
Heath is a separate issue. To fairly discuss this issue we can assume a "cheating" partner is not riddled with STDs. Lol. That you think this says quite a bit about your own moralistic view of sex in general.
You said that one sexual encounter outside of marriage is a reason for divorce. I'm telling you that's petty and ridiculously possessive. And couples owe it to themselves and society to address the issue as a minor bump in the road and not the end of a relationship.
Easy with the attitude. This is a civil conversation. Sorry, but health and safety is always an issue and are absolutely a necessary requirement of a healthy relationship. I'm not going to be mentally healthy if I can't trust my partner is sexually healthy. Especially if we're going to keep being intimate with each other. This isn't a neurotic entitlement of ownership over a partner's body. This is a reasonable entitlement of ownership over my own body. Health is not at all a separate issue when it comes to intimacy in a relationship. And no, we cannot assume the cheating partner is not riddle with STDs because they can't be trusted to be committed, then they can't be trusted to be safe. Trust is easily broken and difficult to repair. It actually says a lot about my view of sexual health and how important that is. I absolutely did not say that one sexual encounter outside of marriage is a reason for divorce. Please don't make stuff up. I said it's up to people to decide for themselves. I'm telling you it's not up to you decide what counts as a minor bump in the road for other people's relationships.
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Post by Spitfire926f on Oct 13, 2021 14:33:52 GMT
I think some people of both sexes are not meant for monogamy. There are some people who are good at it though, men included. Sure, but 46% of men screw up at least once. That doesn't mean they should bail out of a committed relationship. This is very specific to the individual couple. I will say that in my 20's I was more open to those kind of arrangements. Now in my 40's, I can't be bothered with poon hounds at this age. If you're in your 40's or 50's and still can't settle with one partner, move along. At this point it's more mental than biological, and I don't have the energy for Peter Pan syndrome. I think it goes without saying, cheating behind someone's back, be it a one-night stand or an on-going affair, is always wrong.
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Post by Schwarzwald Magnus on Oct 14, 2021 6:51:36 GMT
Cheating is being unfaithful in any way. An affair is recurring with an individual.
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Post by Admin on Oct 16, 2021 6:58:28 GMT
This is very specific to the individual couple. I will say that in my 20's I was more open to those kind of arrangements. Now in my 40's, I can't be bothered with poon hounds at this age. If you're in your 40's or 50's and still can't settle with one partner, move along. At this point it's more mental than biological, and I don't have the energy for Peter Pan syndrome. I think it goes without saying, cheating behind someone's back, be it a one-night stand or an on-going affair, is always wrong. If he's looking for another "partner" then obviously, leave him. If he's having one night of sex with no personal attachment, I'd say it's not worth throwing away a long committed relationship over.
I think you women don't understand how easy it is for a man to separate sex from love. He loves you and may not even like the whore he just had sex with.
It's a matter of trust. Without that, there is no long committed relationship.
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Post by Admin on Oct 16, 2021 7:40:16 GMT
It's a matter of trust. Without that, there is no long committed relationship. It could also be a breach of trust if he buys a sports car and doesn't tell her. Is it worth ending a marriage over? If it's a financial commitment, sure. But I'm pretty sure that's not what you mean by 'long committed relationship' and 'marriage'. If it is, why are you talking about sex?
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Post by Admin on Oct 16, 2021 8:48:52 GMT
If it's a financial commitment, sure. But I'm pretty sure that's not what you mean by 'long committed relationship' and 'marriage'. If it is, why are you talking about sex? You said it was a matter of trust. Buying a car is a longterm financial commitment which could affect both partners for years. That's important. My whole point here is that sex, especially to men, is not that important. When I said it was a matter of trust, I wasn't referring to finance any more than you were when you were talking about sex outside of a long committed relationship, namely marriage.
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Post by Stammerhead on Oct 16, 2021 9:54:22 GMT
If it's a financial commitment, sure. But I'm pretty sure that's not what you mean by 'long committed relationship' and 'marriage'. If it is, why are you talking about sex? You said it was a matter of trust. Buying a car is a longterm financial commitment which could affect both partners for years. That's important. My whole point here is that sex, especially to men, is not that important. It could be argued that for men sex is too important. That’s why some men are willing to pay good money for it and why most sex offenders are male. Monogamy would be the unimportant thing.
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Post by Spitfire926f on Oct 16, 2021 13:32:08 GMT
This is very specific to the individual couple. I will say that in my 20's I was more open to those kind of arrangements. Now in my 40's, I can't be bothered with poon hounds at this age. If you're in your 40's or 50's and still can't settle with one partner, move along. At this point it's more mental than biological, and I don't have the energy for Peter Pan syndrome. I think it goes without saying, cheating behind someone's back, be it a one-night stand or an on-going affair, is always wrong. If he's looking for another "partner" then obviously, leave him.
If he's having one night of sex with no personal attachment, I'd say it's not worth throwing away a long committed relationship over.
I think you women don't understand how easy it is for a man to separate sex from love. He loves you and may not even like the whore he just had sex with.
No, I get it. And I get that a young guy has all those hormones running through him. Those hormones can make you feel powerful, like a sexual god. Sexual energy is powerful. You forget, us women get flooded with those hormones too, it just happens later It comes down to choice. At this stage of the game I'd like to think I can be enough for someone, and they have no reason to wander, especially since I'm a sexual goddess It's not about the whore they don't care about, it's about me who they are supposed to.
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Post by Admin on Oct 17, 2021 22:14:27 GMT
It could be argued that for men sex is too important. That’s why some men are willing to pay good money for it and why most sex offenders are male. Monogamy would be the unimportant thing. Yes, it's an obsession. We all know that. But we can easily detach the person from the sex.
We can have great sex with one person one time and we don't fall in love. We can walk away quite comfortable with the fact that we'll never see them again. It may sound very callous to women, but we can be very detached from our partner. The point being, a one night stand by itself is no threat to a longstanding committed relationship. If you have a one night stand, the commitment is broken.
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Post by Stammerhead on Oct 17, 2021 23:01:26 GMT
It could be argued that for men sex is too important. That’s why some men are willing to pay good money for it and why most sex offenders are male. Monogamy would be the unimportant thing. Yes, it's an obsession. We all know that. But we can easily detach the person from the sex.
We can have great sex with one person one time and we don't fall in love. We can walk away quite comfortable with the fact that we'll never see them again. It may sound very callous to women, but we can be very detached from our partner. The point being, a one night stand by itself is no threat to a longstanding committed relationship. I’ve never really felt that sense of detachment but then I’m not the type who attracts potential partners to a point where I can easily brush off an encounter. My numbers are pretty low…
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Post by Spitfire926f on Oct 17, 2021 23:40:27 GMT
It could be argued that for men sex is too important. That’s why some men are willing to pay good money for it and why most sex offenders are male. Monogamy would be the unimportant thing. Yes, it's an obsession. We all know that. But we can easily detach the person from the sex.
We can have great sex with one person one time and we don't fall in love. We can walk away quite comfortable with the fact that we'll never see them again. It may sound very callous to women, but we can be very detached from our partner. The point being, a one night stand by itself is no threat to a longstanding committed relationship. Wow, I bet you were pissed when gay marriage went federally legal. Unlike, your heterosexual counterparts, you never had to worry about being pressured into it. You totally had a get out of marriage free card. Believe, there are straight cheaters who would love hetero marriage to be illegal as well.
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Post by alpineflower on Oct 18, 2021 1:29:44 GMT
I would be hurt if someone I was involved with had a one night stand
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Post by alpineflower on Oct 18, 2021 1:32:37 GMT
If it's a financial commitment, sure. But I'm pretty sure that's not what you mean by 'long committed relationship' and 'marriage'. If it is, why are you talking about sex? You said it was a matter of trust. Buying a car is a longterm financial commitment which could affect both partners for years. That's important. My whole point here is that sex, especially to men, is not that important. I don't think men would like it if their partner cheated
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Post by Admin on Oct 18, 2021 2:17:12 GMT
If you have a one night stand, the commitment is broken. Too bad we're all imperfect human beings. So in 46% of marriages a sexual commitment was broken. Sorry, it's still not a reason to end a relationship. I'd be more upset if my partner committed to buy a sports car and didn't tell me we'd be strapped with exorbitant payments for the next 4 years. It's a lot easier to sleep on the couch for a month than shelve out 50,000 bucks. It's not about being perfect, as if a one night stand is accidental. A commitment is meaningless without commitment.
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Post by Spitfire926f on Oct 18, 2021 2:34:26 GMT
Wow, I bet you were pissed when gay marriage went federally legal. Unlike, your heterosexual counterparts, you never had to worry about being pressured into it. You totally had a get out of marriage free card. Believe, there are straight cheaters who would love hetero marriage to be illegal as well. Uh, that's the beauty of male homosexuality. We don't have to deal with women. Marriage, no marriage, it's irrelevant. There's not exactly a stampede by gay males to get married, just so you know. I find it hard to believe there aren't gay men who aren't just as serious about marriage as some heteroes and just as big a PIA as some as well.
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Post by Admin on Oct 18, 2021 3:10:58 GMT
It's not about being perfect, as if a one night stand is accidental. A commitment is meaningless without commitment. And I agree it's not a good thing. But only an unrealistic overly possessive overemotional fool would break up a relationship over it. I didn't say it was unforgivable. You can still be in the relationship, but it's not a committed one anymore and your promises mean jack squat now.
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Post by Spitfire926f on Oct 18, 2021 3:11:12 GMT
I find it hard to believe there aren't gay men who aren't just as serious about marriage as some heteroes and just as big a PIA as some as well. Yes, we are just as serious about our RELATIONSHIPS as heterosexuals. What does marriage have to do with it? If you need the government and the church in your bedroom to make sure your marriage works, then I feel sorry for you. I and my partner are committed to each other and we work through these things. We don't need the state's help, thank you very much. That's fine. But that's you and him. But you don't speak for all gay men. And since you're a habitual cheater, you're disqualified from speaking for all men anyway.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 18, 2021 3:34:50 GMT
Yes, it's an obsession. We all know that. But we can easily detach the person from the sex.
We can have great sex with one person one time and we don't fall in love. We can walk away quite comfortable with the fact that we'll never see them again. It may sound very callous to women, but we can be very detached from our partner. The point being, a one night stand by itself is no threat to a longstanding committed relationship. I’ve never really felt that sense of detachment but then I’m not the type who attracts potential partners to a point where I can easily brush off an encounter. My numbers are pretty low… You bring up a good point lmao.. how many dudes are actually just having one night stands. Not like its that easy tbh
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Post by Spitfire926f on Oct 18, 2021 3:40:24 GMT
That's fine. But that's you and him. But you don't speak for all gay men. And since you're a habitual cheater, you're disqualified from speaking for all men anyway. I haven't had sex outside my relationship for about 2 years now, not that it's your business.
But try and make your case without the ad hominem attacks, thank you very much. <<< [monogamous gay eyes] How is that an ad hom attack when you've been defending it? And if you're guy doesn't care, whatever. You're consenting adults, consent being the important verbage. Marriage isn't for everybody and that's okay. If you aren't into monogamy, it isn't for you. I'm just saying, it is for some people.
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