Painkiller Jane Update

Katee Sackhoff is one of the stars of Riddick. I liked that casting, I worried a bit that the role would be a bit too similar to her iconic one as Starbuck (it is), but still, I love Starbuck and Sackhoff is great. Sackhoff plays a lesbian. When this was revealed I thought, that’s quite cool, that opens up quite a few dynamics that should be interesting to see played out. Except instead of exploring interesting dynamics, it seems that the sole reason that she’s a lesbian is so that at the end the movie can say: “Hey look, Riddick’s such an awesome badass that even lesbians want to fuck his manly goodness!” There is literally no reason for Sackhoff’s character to be interested in Riddick. When introduced she views him as scum, he predicts that she’ll want to fuck him later, does an impressive but very brief bit of violence as she watches, then fucks off. She is impressed by Riddick’s violent abilities, but still thinks he’s scum, and seethes a bit about his sex prediction. When Riddick shows up later, at the end of the film, she pretty much just drops her panties for no reason, just because it’s the end of the film and that’s when you get the girl.



Fuck that.



There has been absolutely zero development between the characters, there hasn’t even been any contact between them. Literally the only reason that she decides to have sex with him is because he predicted it and the time he predicted came up. One of the awesome things about Riddick is how he can describe things exactly as they’re going to play out before they actually do. A great example of this is the “I’m going to kill you with my teacup” moment in The Chronicles of Riddick. There’s a few moments like that in Riddick, and they’re generally suitably badass. Riddick gets one big prediction wrong though, but that ties into character arcs and developed relationships so it works. Getting that prediction wrong is the core of why Riddick could have been a good movie.



When Riddick makes his prediction about having sex with Doll (Sackhoff’s character), he doesn’t know that she’s a lesbian. If she was straight it would have been fine for Riddick’s prediction to come true, (though still kinda lame writing as there wasn’t any relationship developed between the characters). But since Doll is a lesbian, that means that the prediction coming true involves changing her entire sexual orientation on a whim. Orientations aren’t quite that malleable, Doll is presented as gay, not bisexual, not of fluid orientation. She does not go near guys. She’s as gay as I am straight, and I’m not about to change my orientation on a whim so I don’t accept her changing hers. The only way to approve of that is if you don’t respect someone’s position on their own orientation. If you think for example, that lesbians just need a real man, like Riddick.



Again. Fuck that.



A more realistic scene would have been for Riddick to hit on her in a “I’m cashing in on my prediction” kind of way, only for her to point out that she’s gay. And here’s the thing about Riddick, he totally would have respected that. There’d be a self-deprecating joke about getting two predictions wrong in one day and then he sails off into the fucking sunset like a badass gentleman.



Instead lesbians are presented as an exotic fruit which can simply be plucked from the branches of their silly ideas once they see what a real man looks like.



It can’t be said enough. Fuck that.