Apology will be accepted. I’m Australian. I saw the midnight premiere about 30 hours ago. And you don’t know the half of how shit this is.
I'm back to officially apologize. Your spoilers were legit and your review of the movie and how terrible it is were spot-on. For my official apology, I've prepared a tune. It is based on a popular song from the 90s and was written by a famous singer who died this year and who I had a Spaceball-like relationship to.
For those who would like to play along at home, the verse progression is Am/G/D resolving on Am. The chorus progression is Em/A resolving on G. I'll skip to the third verse. A one, a two, a one, two, three, four....
Well I don't know, but I'd been told
Yoda showed up, blew up some tomes.
I said "bull," called the man a liar
Damned if little greenie didn't light 'em on fire.
Oh my my! Oh, hell yes!
This movie sucked I mu-u-st confess.
I'll buy you a drink, sing ya this song,
Take me at my word when I say I was wrong....
(chorus)
Big...fat...a-pol-o-gy,
One more time to say I'm sor-ry.
I feel sadness creepin' in and I'm
Leaving this galaxy again....
(guitar solo)
There's porg nests down in Solo's ship,
And Luke's drinkin' from anteaters tits.
Projectin' 'cross that astral plane
Dyin' a death for no real gain.
Oh my my! Oh hell yes!
Leia's like Neo now I guess
It sucked top to bottom, sucked left to right
I need to roll a fattie and forget this shite.
Big....fat....a-pol-o-gy
One more time to say I'm sor-ry.
Now there's no where left to go and the
Sun's down under Pistachio....
(another guitar solo....then coda)
