What TV show did you last watch a season of on DVD/Blu-ray?

Dang it, the Jughead voiceovering will just never go away, will it? Though I admit to being slightly amused that his voiceover was mainly about Archie driving without a license (I feel like he drove last season...but maybe I'm misremembering) and managing to get his father, who'd been shot, to the hospital without wrecking the truck. Although the first person Archie called was Betty, I don't take that to 'mean' anything just because he's with Veronica now. Betty's been his friend for a long time, he probably knew she'd call the others. More distracting was the overly-dramatic way Jughead pulled the cover off the motorcycle which he rode to the hospital. It was interesting that not only were Archie's friends there to support him, but also their parents - especially Betty's mum, who had told Betty to block Archie's number when she received the call from him alerting her to his father having been shot. 

I was mildly amused when Veronica was listing to Betty the things she's better at than anybody else, including 'dance-offs' (I imagine Cheryl's still sore about that one), before she proceeded to mention the stuff she wasn't so good at (ie. 'grief, bedside vigils, comforting boyfriends'). You could tell from the way Archie kept pausing as he told his friends what had happened that he was leaving something out - and, sure enough, towards the end of the episode he revealed that instead of immediately going to comfort/help his dad after he'd been shot or trying to subdue the gunmen, he just froze and closed his eyes until he heard the doorbell that signified the shooter had left. Obviously he's feeling pretty bad/guilty about this, and that's why it takes him so long to tell the full story. I must admit that although I wasn't particularly impressed with K.J. Apa throughout the first season of the show, he showed some significant improvement in this episode and did a good job of conveying the many emotions Archie was going through. At least he wasn't as boring. 

While I LOVED seeing Vegas the dog again this episode, I was sad that he was home all by his lonesome and especially when Archie pointed out to Veronica that the poor pooch wouldn't know what was going on/why Archie's dad wasn't there. I also appreciated the little moment where Veronica offered to walk Vegas, but Archie pointed out she'd probably never walked a dog herself. I liked the story he told about how he'd been so desperate to get a dog, though his dad had made clear he'd have to look after it, but Archie's dad has always walked Vegas when Archie gets home late from practice, takes him out on Saturday mornings so Archie can sleep in and goes to the vet with Archie whenever Vegas gets sick (it's worrisome that he made it sound like Vegas gets sick often - I hope this doesn't mean the pooch's days are numbered ). I know what Archie meant when he said no one loves Vegas more than his dad...but I still thought to myself the dog would be like, "So...that means you don't love me as much, Archie? You dick!". 

It was annoying that Archie got angry at Veronica later on because she emptied the bag of his dad's things the hospital sent home with them and his dad's wallet wasn't among them. I can understand Archie being emotional, but as Veronica said, she was just trying to help. Thankfully, she's no pushover and even when Archie forcibly told her to go, she wouldn't be deterred from staying by his side and supporting him. They also weirdly decided to take a shower together (though Veronica kept her pearl necklace on - that is, of course, the replacement pearl necklace she got last season, as she ruined the original one). I saw people commenting about how weird it was for them to do this, since Archie's dad was fighting for his life, but...eh, people do weird things when they're upset, and Riverdale's full of more weirdos than most places. I guess it was just their way of coping (plus, it seems we can't go too many episodes without either Archie or one of the other guys in the show being shirtless). 'Varchie' are good together...though I still can't get used to that particular 'ship' name.

Speaking of ship names, Bughead go to the retro diner and there's still the pool of blood from Archie's dad on the floor, looking as fresh as if it just happened. That can't possibly be hygienic and is surely a health code violation. Only now was the owner getting around to mopping it up. On the plus side, I think he got more dialogue in this one scene than he did all of last season (from what I can recall). Betty talks about the bikers coming to pay Jughead a visit in last season's final and how he seemed to be in a trance when trying on the Serpent jacket they tossed him. He also mentions that he's not living with a foster family, but they're instead covering for him as he lives in his dad's trailer because he wants to hold onto a part of him...or something (since he's stuck in jail still). Despite Betty obviously not liking Jughead hanging around the bikers, he's doing so to find out whether they had anything to do with Archie's dad getting shot. Towards the end of the episode they turn up at Jugdad's trailer with one of their own who they've clearly given a working over. It seems Jughead's storyline this season is going to be about him being tempted to join the bikers and getting involved with their shady goings-on.

Since Cheryl became an unexpected favourite of mine during Season 1, I was anxiously awaiting seeing her this episode (as the last time we saw her she was burning her gothic house down). I kind of loved the fact that when she finally shows up at the hospital in this episode, she does so complete with hair flip. I was confused when her mum was being wheeled in on a gurney, covered in bandages, since last we saw she was outside with Cheryl as the house burned down. Did Cheryl toss her back in there? I wouldn't put it past her. I was amused at how she interacted with Betty and Kevin, acting like what had happened was no big deal. Even better was when she threatened her mum and briefly cut off her oxygen supply. Can't say I felt much sympathy for that horrible woman given how she treated Cheryl last season. If you raise someone the wrong way and mistreat them to such an extent that they become unhinged...don't be surprised when they turn on you is the lesson to be learned here, I think.






It was cathartic to finally see Cheryl getting some revenge on the one parent she still had alive for all of her cruelty. Cheryl's last scene in the episode involves her paying Archie's dad a visit. He still hasn't woken up and she kisses his forehead (leaving her signature red lipstick stain) and informs Archie's it's "The kiss of life" in return for him saving her from the river she tried to drown herself in during the Season 1 final. I liked that she reassured Archie his dad was going to be fine and then exited with a cheery "Toodles!". I loved the creepy/crazy vibe she was giving off (I wouldn't even put it past her to truly believe that she has the power to give the kiss of life). 




Also creepy this episode? Veronica and her mum's interaction. Veronica seemed to think her mum put out a 'hit' on Archie's dad, and speaking of hitting, Hermione said she'd slap Veronica...except she 'isn't a violent person'. There were other thinly-veiled threats about Veronica's dad showing up, as well as giving her hell for drinking the champagne that was being saved for when he came home. Near the end of the episode he FINALLY showed up, all Mafia boss-like and shrouded in shadow, saying how 'disrespectful' it was for Veronica to drink his Cristal (after Hermione dobbed her in). At least we got to actually see him eventually (though I don't recognise the actor). While I was glad Veronica stood up to her dad, I'm thinking he's probably going to make things more difficult for her than they have been thus far. The vibe he was giving off was that he may be yet another less-than-stellar parent in the show. Perhaps Cheryl can help Veronica fix that?

Apparently the show recast Reggie from last season, as he's no longer played by the actor I recognised from 13 Reasons Why. Josie and the Pussycats showed up to be supportive for Archie in regards to his dad...and I think that was the nicest Josie has ever come across. Sadly, though, no lines for Valerie (I would've thought she'd have at least given Archie a supportive hug and said something to him since they were together at one point, no matter how things ended between them). Meanwhile, Archie's dad was stuck in Dream Sequence Land. The first dream was about being at Archie's graduation and the 'core four' pointed out to him that he never actually made it to the graduation...on account of being dead, then there were other ones I don't really recall, but the last one was a Varchie wedding which was rudely interrupted by the gunmen who shot Archie's dad (this was after he'd seen Cheryl's dead dad and Jason there among the guests). Basically, it was a bunch of dreams that started out okay, but then turned 'bad' for poor ol' Archie's dad. But, hey, at least now Archie's all protective of him and determined to stay up every night (armed with a baseball bat - because that'll do wonders against a guy armed with a gun), guarding the house. I wonder if Vegas is all like, "Hey, that's my job!".

The episode ends with Miss Grundy, who evidently hasn't given up on her predatory pursuits of students, as she's still giving 'music lessons' to one. However, the shooter must be in the know about the sorts of stuff she gets up to, as he proceeds to strangle her to death. The music playing during the scene, with the creepy 'la-la-la-ing', sounded eerily familiar to me when I heard it, but it wasn't until I went online and read that it was the music from the movie Rosemary's Baby that I realised where I'd heard it before. And so we have another murder mystery to solve. Honestly, wouldn't most parents be moving their kids away from Riverdale at this point, considering all the murders that happen there?

The title of the second episode immediately reminded me of Xander's lame codename he came up with for himself in the Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 3 episode 'Dead Man's Party' (a very frustrating episode). Anyway, this episode begins with Jughead voiceovering about how the retro diner that everyone seems to hang out (Pop's Chock'lit Shoppe is its full title) was exceedingly popular...that was until Archie's dad got shot there. When Pop asked Jughead whether he'd seen what had been written on the front of his shop, I answered "no", because I'd somehow totally missed that what Jughead reacted to before he walked in there was graffiti saying 'DeAth DINER'. Firstly, who the hell spells the word 'death' with the letters 'D' and 'A' in capitals but not the rest? I guess the same sorts of people who wrote 'Go to hell serpent slut' without a comma on Betty's locker last season. And secondly, as has been pointed out elsewhere, no one actually died in that diner. Sure, Archie's dad came close to dying, but he's still very much alive, as evidenced by Archie attempting (and failing) to cook breakfast for him at home. Some of it falls on the floor, but this means more food for Vegas the dog, who I'm glad to see again. Something I was less happy to see was that Archie even answers the door shirtless. Apparently he has as much trouble finding a shirt to put on as Jacob did in the Twilight films. 

Archie continues to sit up at night with his trusty baseball bat at the ready against an armed gunmen and the ridiculousness of this is pointed out to him by New Reggie when he gets attacked by Archie (who thinks he's seeing the shooter everywhere, and once he finds out about Miss Grundy's death - and that she was strangled using the cello bow he gifted her last season - he's sure that it's connected with his dad getting shot/someone's out to get all the people he cares about. He even confesses to Sheriff Clueless that he and Miss Grundy were 'close', without going into explicit detail). The reason for New Reggie coming over is because Archie's wanting some drugs to help him stay alert at night. Attacking your drug-dealer with a baseball bat probably isn't the best way to score drugs, Archie. New Reggie feels quite a bit different to Old Reggie since they recast him (the original actor went off to do 13 Reasons Why - which, ironically, I had watched the first season of on DVD prior to starting this show). New Reggie also interacts with a female character I can't recall ever seeing before called Midge, who will become important by the end of the episode. 

Once Betty learns of Pop’s retro diner closing, she makes it her personal mission to help save it (since it's a place of fond memories for the gang, but especially Betty). She asks Cheryl, who announces that Josie is joining the cheerleaders (Josie seems friendly at first, but then claims to be a 'team player' while insisting she be at the front - which draws reactions from the other cheerleaders. This is why I can never warm up to Josie as a character), but Cheryl refuses to help. She's also not very helpful when Bughead go over to her new place of residence in the hope that she'll help reduce Jugdad's jailtime by speaking in his defense (this is after Jughead's gone to a Serpent lawyer - called a 'Snake Charmer' - against his dad's wishes. It's kind of ridiculous she asks Jughead for a favour in return for her advice which is simply to get the Blossoms to speak favourably about his dad. Anyone could've told Jughead that, and unlike her, they wouldn't have asked for shady favours in return). I'm bummed that Cheryl and her scarred mum are now living in what looks like an extravagant greenhouse (I miss the old gothic Blossom house), but it's kind of worth it for two reasons - one being how Cheryl greets Bughead as 'Hobo' and 'Bride of Hobo', and the other being Betty saying (after their unsuccessful attempt to appeal to Cheryl's humanity) that she's 'gone full Poison Ivy'. Considering where she's now living (plus, the red hair...not to mention her flower-related name), I wouldn't put it past Cheryl to wind up with plant powers in her next step towards becoming a supervillain.

Jughead's so worked up that he tells Betty's he'd blackmail Cheryl...except she just lost her dad. It's kind of a shame that even after Betty and Jughead helped save her in last season's final (sure, Archie did all the ice-punching and performed CPR on her, but Betty was the one who figured out what her text message meant and if she hadn't, they wouldn't have gotten there in time), Cheryl's still acting like her old self towards them. However, Betty's not done with Cheryl yet. She accosts her in the girl's locker room...and THANK YOU, show, for finally being equal opportunity with the near-nakedness in this episode. If we had to endure shirtless Archie again, it was only fair we were also treated to Cheryl in her sexy red lingerie - which she looks smokin' in, btw.



'Dark Betty' appears to emerge, as she has no such qualms like Jughead did about blackmailing Cheryl, saying she'll send footage of Cheryl's dad shooting Jason out there for everyone to see unless she does what they want. Cheryl begrudgingly agrees, calling Betty a 'stone-cold bitch' in the process, and then later she is doing her best to convince the judge, but when it doesn't appear to be working, she lies about having heard her dad threaten Jughead if Jugdad didn't cover up for him. Now, I know for a fact last season we learned that was indeed the reason why Jugdad went along with the covering up after Cheryl's dad, so I guess when she talks about lying under oath, what she means is she didn't actually hear the threatening when it happened (though obviously found out about it later). It was a nice touch, seeing her wearing her spider brooch again (the one she was going to give Jughead last season, when she was apparently giving her stuff away before she attempted to off herself). 

Towards the end of the episode, Cheryl and two of the Pussycats - Josie and Melody (who gets one line of dialogue) - show up at Pop's diner, as apparently Valerie's sick, and Betty's finally managed to get people to help support the place staying open. She wants them to sing, Josie refuses, but Cheryl says she can assist. They then proceed to sing the song 'Milkshake' on the roof of the diner. Considering what that song's actually about, it seemed a bit inappropriate for Pop's supposedly family-friendly establishment (though it's the first cover version of theirs that I've actually not-minded). I was amused by Cheryl's comment about Bughead's PDA at the diner, saying how they looked like 'chimps in captivity grooming and picking lice off each other'. Cheryl usually gets the best lines. She also thinks that showing the footage of her dad killing Jason (once Betty hands it over) to her scarred mum will somehow bring her peace/closure.

Other things happening at the diner were Veronica giving her parents a 'fresh start', as prior to this she'd attempted to show her mum what sort of man her dad is by presenting her with a letter she'd received that threatened her mum if she didn't defend her dad/speak in his favour, only for her mum to turn around and inform her she wrote the letter to herself. There's also the matter of Smithers (who I could never hear the name of and *not* associate with The Simpsons), the Lodge family butler and Veronica's only ally against her shady dad, who tries to help her avoid running into him as she exits the building near the start of the episode, but it doesn't work and he catches what Smithers is trying to do - which is obviously why by the end of the episode Smithers has been replaced by someone who's clearly more loyal to Veronica's dad. Veronica doesn't look happy about this, especially after Jughead had managed to convince her earlier on to give her dad a second chance since Jughead's dad is in jail and Archie's dad just got shot (Veronica and Jughead really need more scenes together, as it's so rarely just the two of them). To top things off, little does Veronica know that her mum was just covering for her dad when she said she wrote that threatening letter to herself, thus meaning he was in fact the one behind it. 

Veronica's parents aren't the only crappy ones this episode, though. Betty's mum, Alice, spends her time at the diner filming/taking photos of different people on her phone and then informs Betty that she has singlehandedly made Pop's a haven for drug-dealers, as she's just observed several drug-dealings going on that very night. Typical Alice, she's never very encouraging towards her daughter. I mean, surely drug-dealing was happening there before Betty decided to try to save the place. The episode ends with Archie getting a gun from some creeper by the name of Dilton Doiley (seriously), and that girl New Reggie was talking to earlier - Midge - along with poor ol' Moose who just can't catch a break, as last season he got beaten up and this episode he gets shot at by the guy in the black mask who shot Archie's dad and killed Miss Grundy. It's all very 80's horror movie-inspired, with the killing two lovers in a car on Lovers' Lane at night (honestly, I was half-expecting one of them to get out of the car to go investigate a mysterious noise and the one left in the car would soon hear a banging sound on the car roof, then bolt from the car only to turn around and find the killer banging the head of the other one on the roof...but I guess that would've been more of a Supernatural type of thing rather than this show's type of thing).

However, it's revealed in the third episode that Midge and poor ol' Moose didn't in fact die (we later find out that Moose shielded Midge with his body). That's kind of lame. The shooter must have really poor aim if he couldn't even kill two 'teens' stuck in a car at close range. Bizarrely, Kevin is out night jogging around Lovers' Lane and then seemingly starts snogging the first rando he runs into. It was pretty weird. Betty says it's not safe and I couldn't understand Kevin's anger at her, since she was just thinking of his wellbeing but he somehow makes it about her not wanting him to find someone to be with or some BS. He goes on about how she has plenty of options but he has very few - though I don't get this, since I can't recall anyone giving him a hard time about being gay last season, he seems pretty 'accepted' by most people and even his dad's cool with it...so why is he making it sound like he has to sneak around to find anyone to be with? He had his biker b/f last season and didn't run into too many problems with people hassling him that I can recall. I mean, unless you count Cheryl's insults towards him...not that he even hears them in this episode.





Speaking of Cheryl, this episode her purpose seems to be just hovering around Betty and Kevin, eavesdropping (the shot of her walking back and forth past them in the hallway at school was amusing). She has a talk with Betty, then they track Kevin down in the woods. Considering everything he knows is going on out there, he's an idiot to keep putting himself in danger. At least when a seemingly dodgy guy in a car propositions him later on, he finally gets it through his thick skull that being out in the middle of the woods just to get some action when there's a killer on the loose might lead to him getting the wrong kind of action, so he runs home. Even his dad, Sheriff Clueless, has more of a clue than his son, saying they should talk about the stuff they don't want to talk about normally. I was over Kevin this episode, as he just annoyed me. 

Other things going on this episode - Jughead goes to the Southside school, meets Toni Topaz (who was more likeable in this one episode, during her first appearance in the show, than Josie has been over the course of a whole season...plus two episodes). We finally heard Jughead's real name - Forsythe Pendleton Jones III (no wonder he goes by 'Jughead'. I didn't think it was possible for his real name to be worse than his nickname...but I was wrong) - but it was weird that out of all the characters, this new character of Toni got to be the one to utter it in the series first (that I can recall, anyway). I'm hoping the gang knows what Jughead's real name is and he just told them it offscreen, as I'd hate to think a character he just met knows more about him than Betty or his friends do. 

Anyway, Toni wants him to sit with the Serpent students, but he doesn't want to. There's other students there she refers to as 'Ghoulies' who want to give him a hard time and even beat him up later on (which he lies about to Betty. BAD Jughead!). He meets other Serpent students and one of them manages to have an even more ridiculous name than Jughead (his name's Sweet Pea, for crying out loud. Also ridiculous? Their name for the drugs they deal at that school is 'jingle-jangle'). Betty and Toni meet, they seem friendly enough to each other but there's an undertone of them not actually being as 'cool' with one another as they act in front of Jughead. Though they do think alike - both of them bringing Jughead a jug (how imaginative) now that he's trying to get the school's defunct newspaper going again. I certainly hope this doesn't become a 'love triangle' (we already get enough of those).

Bughead and Archie also meet Veronica's dad in this episode. He seems friendly enough to them, but asks Veronica to leave him alone with Archie, then he delivers the usual fatherly threats to the boy dating his daughter (but seems extra dangerous). He's already threatened Hermione about turning Veronica against him (this was in spite of the fact that Veronica's mum still hasn't been very nice to her daughter so far this season. She's seemingly changed quite a bit from last season. Veronica hasn't really changed though, as she still has her priorities. There may be a masked killer out there, but she's not going to miss The Matchelorette - this universe's version of The Bachelorette), and he's especially creepy with the Veronica painting he has hanging in his study and likes to look at apparently, then after he asks Archie if he's ever had rum (Archie's response: “Rum? Like the alcohol?”. No, Archie, some other kind of rum), he encourages Archie to do more than just start a neighbourhood watch group - which he decided to do after a letter is sent out from the shooter who wishes to be referred to as 'Black Hood' (personally, I would've gone with 'Black Mask'...but then they might've confused him with the Batman villain) and he's included not only the wallet Archie's dad had been missing, but also Miss Grundy's red sunglasses. Consequently, Archie is now more convinced than ever that this is ALL ABOUT HIM, so he thinks having students be extra watchful will somehow help. Ethel is chased by someone in a truck, but Archie - along with New Reggie, who is now apparently his sidekick - come to her rescue. 

Anyway, Archie interprets the suggestion from Veronica's dad in the strangest of ways (as only people in Riverdale can) - he forms a shirtless army. Literally, all the guys behind him are shirtless from what I can remember, plus they're wearing red hoods (Archie has comic books called the 'Red Circle', which is what he decides to call his shirtless army). It looks as ridiculous as it sounds (though it's odd that this is the one time it'd make sense for Archie to be shirtless...yet he isn't). "We are Legion", Archie? Really?? I'm not sure who on the writing staff for this show came up with this harebrained idea, but Archie and a bunch of red-hooded shirtless 'teens' aren't the least bit intimidating when they send out their video saying they're 'coming for/going to hunt and find and end' Black Hood. Heck, Veronica's creepy painting was more intimidating. 

After last episode ended with Archie and his Shirtless Army's ridiculous video designed to threaten the Black Hood (but probably just gave him a good laugh), this episode he suffers the consequences for it. His dad's not happy with him, and neither is Veronica. Though little does she know her father was the one who put the idea into Archie's head. Thankfully, it wasn't long before Archie told Veronica as much (though I liked the part where she was skeptical that her dad told Archie to get a bunch of his buddies together, minus their shirts, and put on red hoods. I think if her father had told Archie to do exactly that, it would've been pretty weird and like Veronica's dad had something rather suspect planned for them...which, ew). Archie quotes exactly what Veronica's dad said to him, so then she goes to confront him about it. Naturally, he's still playing innocent but Veronica knows something's up. For some strange reason she changes her tune and wants to support Archie's Shirtless Army 'Red Circle'. What probably isn't the smartest move, though, is walking around with shirts that basically have targets on the front of them (why even have them specially made up when she could've just gone to Target and bought a bunch of shirts with their logo on them?) - which Archie points out to her (when Archie is pointing out to you that you're doing something dumb, Veronica...be afraid). 



Meanwhile, Betty’s mum is not happy about Betty helping Polly get gone last episode (her reason for wanting to hightail it out of there was because the Black Hood is apparently targeting 'sinners' and, as she puts it, she's the 'poster child for sin' on account of her being an unwed mother carrying her cousin's twins) and says she’s scared every time Betty walks out the door, etc. I found Mädchen Amick's acting a bit too much in that scene. I get that Alice worries about Betty (though she treats her pretty shoddily a lot of the time too), but it seemed kind of over-the-top. Betty receives a letter from the Black Hood along with a cipher that he says only she can crack. She keeps the letter secret from everyone after talking to Kevin (who, btw, is still giving her a hard time despite the fact that it was him who was making the stupid decisions last episode, going out into the woods and putting himself in danger). 

Jughead ends up working on the cipher with Toni Topaz who he met last episode (Jughead makes a reference to the Black Hood possibly being a Batman villain), then Betty says they should all work on it together. Their attempts to crack the code aren't going so well, Betty's getting frustrated and Toni makes a snarky comment under her breath about Betty loosening her ponytail. Kevin scores some points back by vehemently defending/sticking up for Betty's ponytail that, in his words, is 'iconic and beyond reproach'. Then things turn a bit nasty when Toni verbally lashes out at Betty, accusing her of always blaming the Southside for everything and hating the Serpents (so she managed to last one episode before annoying me). Someone really should've let her know that Betty made a speech at the town hall all about accepting the Southside, had 'serpent slut' written on her locker in pig's blood and has been trying to help Jughead get his dad (who is a Serpent) out of jail. This just felt like an excuse to have Betty and Toni opposing each other (even though Betty really didn't do anything wrong). Here's hoping Toni takes it down a notch and apologises for her unwarranted outburst, otherwise she's going to become a very tiresome character to have around if all she does is argue with Betty (and come between/break up Bughead in the process). 

Archie's not having the best time either, as he's told by the principal to disband his Shirtless Army 'Red Circle' otherwise there'll be no more football team (I'm pretty sure that would do more harm for the school than anything). New Reggie and the others aren't happy about this, but Archie reckons the reason why he had the others in his video wear masks was to protect their identities so they wouldn't get into trouble. Veronica figures out he wants to go it alone, and despite her protestations, he goes and buys ammo, a holster and a Kevlar vest from an army shop using a fake ID and then proceeds to go around the Southside, spray painting red circles everywhere, when he's accosted by Sweet Pea (the guy with the even more ridiculous name than Jughead) and a couple of his minions. They threaten Archie and Sweet Pea pulls a switchblade...but Archie pulls a gun, thus giving them a quick lesson in bringing a knife to a gunfight, before chasing them off.

The next day at school, the principal comes to get Archie, Veronica says the shirts were her idea, but it’s not about that. It's because Southsiders reported Northsiders waving a gun around at them. While all this is going on, Betty is still trying to crack the cipher that the Black Hood said only she could do - which, when combined with Jughead referring to her as 'Nancy Drew', gives her an idea of how to do it. They go to the library and find her Nancy Drew Secret-Code Activity Book, which she apparently used to borrow out all the time, and she uses it to decipher the code. At the same time, New Reggie and the other members of Archie's Shirtless Army 'Red Circle' have decided to support Archie in whatever he wants to do since he didn't rat them out. Then the Southsiders turn up at the door (how'd they find out where Archie lives? And when Sweet Pea said Archie came to his door, I thought "No he didn't. He was out on the street.") and are ready to rumble, but Veronica acts as referee and says there should be rules such as no weapons. The Northsiders vs Southsiders decide to have a moody fight in the rain while a town meeting is being held discussing what should be done about the Southside. Alice is against them, of course, but Archie's dad stands up for them. While they're arguing, Hermione whispers that Archie's dad is going to be a problem, but Veronica's dad says the town trusts/respects him and they can use that.

The two rival gangs start fighting after Archie lands the first punch against Sweet Pea (who wasn't so tough after all), and at the same time Bughead are figuring out that the code was saying the Black Hood's next target would be at the town hall. They run to interrupt the town meeting, but nothing actually really happens, though Betty pulls a fire alarm and then finally has to give up the letter she received to Sheriff Clueless, her mum, the mayor, etc (her reason for keeping it from everyone, which she explains to Jughead at one point, is that because the Black Hood said in it that he was doing what he was doing for Betty and that he was inspired by her speech at the end of last season, she thought Archie would blame her for his dad getting shot). Back at the rainy fight, Dilton Doiley (who may just have the MOST ridiculous name out of everyone...and this is in a show where someone's actually named Sweet Pea) gets stabbed in the leg (or did he stab himself? It's unclear) and the fight is finally broken up when Veronica arrives, looking spectacular in her hooded cape, firing a gun into the air (the one that Archie had asked her to retrieve from a toilet tank at school, which he hid there so it wouldn't be found when his locker was searched, and that she said she'd thrown away). 

Naturally, Archie's shirtless later on as Veronica tends to his wounds. They then go to toss Archie's gun into the river (though don't weapons keep finger prints even after getting wet? I'm sure it'll resurface at some point and be used to frame Archie somehow) while Jughead voiceovers about how Riverdale's now 'the town that dreaded sundown' rather than what it used to be known as (and says on its sign) - 'The Town with Pep!' (personally, I would've said its new slogan should be 'The Town of Death!').  The episode ends with Betty receiving a call asking what her favourite scary movie is from the Black Hood. The most disappointing thing about this episode was that while Cheryl appeared in it, she didn't actually get any lines (and her lines are usually the best). She just handed out the T-shirts Veronica had made up for Archie’s Shirtless Army ‘Red Circle’ and was in the background of a few scenes...and that was it. What a waste of a great character!

No Jughead voiceover at the start of the fifth episode - hurray! We did get Lili Reinhart, who plays Betty, saying the "Previously on Riverdale...", though - which makes sense, since this episode was kind of a big one for her. It picks up right where the previous one left off, with Black Hood on the phone to her. He goes on about how he's trying to 'purify' Riverdale or whatever, getting rid of the 'sinners', etc. To show he means business, he says he's going to kill Polly (the self-admitted 'poster child for sin carrying her cousin's twins') and the only way to prevent him from doing so is for Betty to do what he says (and, of course, not tell people about his phone call to her). I found it odd that Alice couldn't tell how upset her daughter was when she came into her bedroom...but she was doing some ranting, so that may have blinded her to the obvious. Black Hood's first demand of Betty is that she print a mugshot of her mum that basically says she was once a Southside Serpent. Considering how vocal Alice has been about how bad they are, this makes her seem like a major hypocrite.

Meanwhile, Jughead is trying to get the Serpents to calm down and NOT build a pipe bomb to go after the Northsiders and blow up their newspaper office. Toni Topaz basically tells him his dad kept the peace in the Serpents and if he wants to do the same, he's got to be all-in. After some thinking about it, Jughead says he will. Him and Betty have one scene together before everything goes to hell (if only they could've gotten away from Riverdale like they talked about doing). While they were probably aiming for 'scary' with the snake masks, when the Serpents rudely awake Jughead...they're more unintentionally comical than anything.



And that's not the only unintentionally funny thing they do, as later they have Jughead reciting their Serpent laws by yelling at him and him yelling back. He also has to take care of 'the beast' aka Hotdog III (so, there's been a few), a mutt that's apparently nowhere near as good a doggie as Vegas is (judging by Jughead's complaints about it after only a day), stick his hand in a rattlesnake cage to retrieve a knife (he gets bitten, but is informed that the snake's venom glands have been removed) and the final test is him surviving 'the gauntlet' - which is basically just all the Serpent guys beating the crap out of him until they think he's had enough and then shake his hand. Before all that transpires, though, Veronica's told by her parents that an old friend of hers, Nick St. Clair (played by an actor I recognised as the same one who played the son of Julianna Margulies in The Good Wife), is coming to town with his parents and she has been tasked with showing him around Riverdale/basically keeping him happy if she wants to have a seat at the table in her parents' business. She's fully aware that Nick's a flirt and obviously the two of them got up to some bad stuff when they used to hang out. He's clearly still interested in Veronica (he even gets forceful with her at one point), as well as her Pussycat ears and the Pussycats themselves...but not Archie (who doesn't think much of Nick either).

Betty thinks she's found a loophole in the Black Hood's rules about not telling anyone, since among the names he listed, he never mentioned Archie and she thinks it won't look odd for them to be chatting on their way to school, so she tells him about the calls. Of course, he's not much help and Betty is forced by the Black Hood to cut Veronica out of her life (if she does so, he says she can ask him a question). When Veronica gets everyone together hanging out, Nick shows that unlike Veronica, he's still all about the bad habits and is offering that ridiculously-named drug (jingle-jangle). At first Veronica won't partake and neither will Archie (which Nick gives him a hard time about), but then Veronica finally does. Betty decides this is the best time to do what the Black Hood wants and starts really laying into the unsuspecting Veronica, calling her out on her 'trashy' past and clearly hitting some nerves before leaving. I felt bad for both Betty and Veronica here - the former because she obviously hated hurting her friend and the latter because she had no clue where any of this was coming from. Everyone's thoroughly confused, as Betty sits alone on a moody bench and gets to ask the Black Hood one question (though only now does he limit it to not including asking him what his name is - the cheater!). She asks if she'd know/recognise him and he says 'yes'. 



Later at an event, Alice shows up in a booby dress with an IDGAF attitude towards all those passing judgement on her (telling her husband to "shove it" before he can say anything). Nick drugs Cheryl and takes her to a room, clearly about to rape her, but thankfully Veronica and the Pussycats can tell something's up and they get there in the nick (no pun intended) of time to stop the rapist before he can do anything...then they proceed to beat/kick the crap out of him. It was a glorious cheer-worthy moment, for sure. I was glad the show demonstrated some restraint and didn't actually have the rape happen to poor Cheryl. What happened to her was enough, and she obviously can be taken at her word when she says she wants Nick to 'burn in hell' (just ask her mum). 




At least in the scene where they're all comforting Cheryl, Betty reassures Veronica that what Nick did wasn't her fault (which probably confuses Veronica even further after the way Betty last talked to her, but hopefully it lets her know that Betty wasn't actually herself when she was being nasty). Unfortunately for Betty, Black Hood isn't through with her and next he wants her to cut Jughead out of her life. She's still talking to Archie about all this and asks if he can go break up with Jughead on her behalf - but in such a way that the two of them can come back from it when all this is resolved. Archie starts off doing as Betty wished, but when the Serpents appear, he loses it and basically ensures that Jughead won't think there's any possible way of getting back with Betty. This leads to the infuriating moment where Toni (who wastes no time at all making her move after Bughead has literally just broken up) snogs Jughead. As if I didn't dislike her enough already when earlier she'd called him 'Juggie' (that's BETTY'S nickname for him, ho-bag!). Congrats, Toni, you have officially dethroned Josie as my least favourite character on this show. 

One thing I haven't mentioned so far is the hilariousness of Betty's ringtone being the song 'Lollipop'. It's so bright and bouncy/cheery...yet every time Betty's phone rings and the song plays, it's always either during or just after something serious/dramatic. The first time I heard it, it gave me a good laugh (as I totally wasn't expecting it), and then it continued amusing me every time after. I kept thinking that surely Betty would want to change her ringtone, since every time she heard that song it usually meant something bad...but nope, she keeps it. Black Hood finally says he'll let her know who he is (which seems like total BS, considering he'd made clear earlier she couldn't even ask him his name) and directs her to a large abandoned building in the middle of nowhere (because that seems safe), where her ringtone plays (I lost count of how many times it played during the episode) and once again it cracks me up, as it's always in the most inappropriate settings/at the most inopportune times.



He directs her to a box on the floor which has a black hood in it just like the one he wears, tells her to put it on, and once she does he says they're the same as she's facing a mirror. Later on when he calls Betty at home, he says he knows she's been talking to Archie and although she points out to him that he never said she couldn't speak to Archie, he still considers it breaking the rules and tells her he's going to off Polly unless she gives him the name of another 'sinner'...so she names Nick St. Clair (can't say I'm going to be too broken up if Black Hood does actually go through with offing Nick, since one less rapist in the world can only be a good thing. The downside is the guilt Betty would feel over it). The episode ends with Black Hood reminding her that he told her they were the same.

Argh! Jughead's voiceover returns! I didn't miss it AT ALL during the previous episode. After giving Black Hood the name of Nick St. Clair as the 'sinner' he should go after, to spare her sister's life, Betty goes to check whether he's still alive (which I wouldn't have bothered doing, considering he tried to force himself on Veronica and was about to rape Cheryl in the previous episode). Sadly, Nick still draws breath. He does get taken away by the sheriff, but unfortunately his parents have made deals with not only Veronica's parents, but also Cheryl's mum. Speaking of, Cheryl's pretending to be okay after her ordeal, but Veronica can tell she isn't. It's too bad Cheryl isn't pressing charges like she'd originally said she wanted to - this is because of her mum. Veronica encourages her to, even telling Cheryl about her own rough encounter with Nick, but Cheryl basically shoos away Veronica's pleas to pursue justice and says if she wants it, she should do it herself.

The mayor gets everyone together who was involved in that night of partying with Nick, New Reggie was the one who brought the jingle-jangle drugs, Josie partook in them - which her mum isn't happy - and Veronica shows what a supportive friend she is to Josie, holding her hand as Josie's mum reminds her daughter that her dad struggled with addiction himself. Ew, Jughead and Toni spent the night together (though she claims that it was just a "PG-13 grope session"), she recognises that he's still got feelings for Betty and says she doesn't want to be a rebound, then at school she gets carted away when the sheriff and his men start grabbing students on the mayor's orders, while Archie manages to get Jughead out of there. They go to visit Jugdad in jail and he 'whispers' to them that they should challenge the Ghoulies to a street race (not sure how this wasn't overheard by the guard standing not too far away) for territory, meaning the winner takes full control over Southside, including all the properties that were owned by the Serpents. 

Meanwhile, Black Hood wants Betty to find out the identity of a drug-dealer called the 'Sugar Man', but she knows he’ll kill him if she gives him a name. I was actually a bit sad that she apparently replaced her 'Lollipop' ringtone (despite me wondering all last episode why she hadn't). It was giving me a good laugh whenever it'd play and she'd react to it, but now that's no more.  She pays a visit to Cheryl, who is about as 'nice' to her as usual. Cheryl's mum receives hush money in the form of a cheque which Cheryl keeps from her. Madelaine Pitsch continues to bring it with all of Cheryl's emotional scenes. I'm so glad we got more Cheryl this episode, with her actually having lines (unlike the previous episode), as she adds so much to the show and episodes without her just aren't the same/as good. 



Veronica still hasn't forgiven Betty for the way she talked to her last episode (when the Black Hood forced her to cut Veronica out of her life) and although Kevin is being a friend to Veronica when they run into Betty in the hallway at school, he still annoys me on account of the fact that he seemed to hold a grudge against Betty even before what she said to Veronica occurred. Thankfully, Betty finally comes clean to Veronica about why she'd been so mean to her last episode (I'm glad that Veronica let go of her grudge once she learned the truth and they were friends again, as I hated them being on the outs) and Veronica mentions how she doesn't want to tell her dad what Nick tried to do to her, as she knows he'd probably have him killed (though, again, I don't see what the problem is with that). I was so happy when Veronica stood up to the Ghoulie a-hole who was calling her and Betty 'bitches'/'skanks'. Go Veronica! I also liked the shot of the gang hanging out at the drag-race, as it looked very comic book-y. 



Although Betty wasn't yet able to fill Jughead in on why she'd had Archie break up with him for her (which apparently offended/hurt Jughead more than anything), she did make it clear that she still loved Jughead - which kind of confused him, but at least it made him willing to hear her out whenever she did eventually decide to explain things to him. The best part of the scene, however, was Cheryl snatching flag girl duties for the race from Toni - including calling her 'Cha-Cha' (I was so happy to get that reference, as some of them I don't) - and then proving she was indeed 'born for this moment' before the drag-race commenced.






As always seems to be the case in drag-races, the cars hit each other, Jughead is willing to die, but Archie isn’t and makes them stop before the cars reach the bridge that they both weren't going to fit on together (not that Jughead seemed to care about that little detail). Jughead gets mad, but it's revealed that the sheriff is waiting up ahead for the Ghoulies and they get arrested. It was all part of Archie's plan (hey, good for him! He managed to come up with a plan that didn't involve shirtlessness for a change). Jughead's still not happy, though, due to the fact that the Ghoulies will likely retaliate. The member of the Serpents called 'Tall Boy' annoys me, as he always seems to yell...just as he does to Jughead after the race. 

When she's not being the flag girl for drag-races, Cheryl's at home finding a childhood drawing of her with Jason and apparently the Sugar Man who used to come over and have dealings with her dad. She brings it to her mum, who isn't very helpful, learns Nick's going to get away with what he did and that her mum made a deal with his parents (I think that's what happened, anyway). This is why she ends up holding ransom the cheque her mum received. Later, she finds her mum near the fireplace and warns her that's probably not the best spot for someone who just got burned in a house fire (speaking of, how is it that her mum barely has any scars now? She only really seems to have them on an arm). Her mum tells her that there have been numerous Sugar Men over the years and that Jason was being groomed by his and Cheryl's dad to take over the family business which would also involve meeting the Sugar Man (his mum was against this). She says it all led to his death, Cheryl hands her the cheque but she ends up burning it, though Cheryl does find out the name of the current Sugar Man which she tells Betty via phone call. 

Betty tells the Black Hood she got the name, but won't tell him it, instead assuring him that the name of the Sugar Man will be in the newspaper and he'll get arrested. This is apparently her way of keeping the Black Hood from killing the guy - though, again, he isn't someone who's really worth keeping safe...just like Nick isn't. Regarding Nick, Veronica lets her parents know what he did to her and her dad reacts pretty much how she expected. The following day, Jughead's teacher who helped him get the Southside school newspaper running again is arrested, as he's apparently the Sugar Man. He winds up in jail, and the next time Betty speaks to Black Hood she's feeling pretty good about what she's done/certainly seems sure of herself - so much so that she informs him that she's coming after him next. Things get a tad creepy when she says she's breathing down his neck and asks whether he can feel it/feel her (and little does she know that the Black Hood manages to somehow gain access to the Sugar Man's cell and proceeds to shoot him dead). Meanwhile, Veronica's parents inform her that Nick was in an accident...and her reaction pretty much mirrors my own upon hearing the news.



While the following episode was blissfully free of Jughead's voiceover, instead we got an unusual bunch of white text crawling up the screen as well as audio, complete with scratchy quality (like a movie reel) that says "What you are about to witness are three twisted tales connected to the tragic and macabre events that befell the town of Riverdale. Known as the "Black Hood murders", they were all the more tragic because those who bore witness to these terrible things were so young. A seemingly random shooting quickly revealed itself to be the first in a series of gruesome attacks perpetrated by a hooded assailant. These latest chapters began with the discovery of a letter from the Black Hood affixed to the door of Pop Tate's Chock'lit Shoppe."

This^ sounds a whole lot more interesting than what we actually get in the episode. It's broken into three tales - the first being 'Archie & Jughead'. The Black Hood has left a letter at Pop's diner admitting he was responsible for offing Jughead's teacher/the Sugar Man. He then says he's giving the town of Riverdale a reprieve from his killing if they can manage to prove they're 'pure-of-heart'/pass his test that involves them going without 'sinning' for the next 48 hours. It's good that Jughead and Betty are back together, but their happiness is short-lived when he receives a call from Penny Peabody, the Serpents' lawyer/'Snake Charmer', who's calling in that favour he owed her for her lame advice that, really, anyone could've given him and wasn't worth getting, considering she wants him to do a delivery of something that all signs point to being drugs even if she won't come right out and say it. Archie wants to help, they drive, but break down, Archie sees a disturbing deer covered in blood crossing the road, then as if things weren't disturbing enough, Tony Todd shows up to give them a ride, but Jughead only has $18 bucks, which means Tony Todd will only take him and not Archie, who stays behind to wait for roadside assistance.

Tony Todd is adamant no one looks under the tarp on the back of his truck, but when Jughead does so after they make a pitstop, he sees there is a dead deer under there. Tony Todd tells Jughead a tale about the Riverdale Reaper serial killer as they eat food, but after they finish eating, he wants Jughead to pay, except he already gave him everything he had (as he reminds Tony Todd - he only had $18 bucks). They're looking to leave without paying, but turns out Archie caught up with them and he pays instead. This whole bit with Tony Todd felt like it was just there to add a bit of 'creep factor' to proceedings and didn't really serve much purpose other than that. Archie and Jughead make the delivery and meet an old Russian woman who wears a beret. Later, Jughead finds out that he and Archie were caught on surveillance footage which Penny uses as blackmail to ensure Jughead keeps doing deliveries for her (though how was it incriminating? They're carrying a crate...and that's it). It's also revealed that Jugdad, who she'd told Jughead had been badly injured in jail, is actually okay and that it was all a lie that she used to get Jughead to do what she wanted. Jughead is far too easily manipulated by her, it would seem.

The second 'tale' is Josie's...and it really shows why it's not the best idea to give her too much focus, as her story - like her character - isn't that interesting. She's nice with Cheryl, at least, but has gone behind the other two Pussycats' backs to do her own solo music thing - which they later find out and aren't happy about (it was good to hear from Valerie again. She's more interesting than Josie, and even Melody got some dialogue - a rarity). Josie's also dealing with Chuck (the jerk who made both Betty and Veronica's lives hard, not to mention a bunch of other girls who he treated terribly) and a stalker who's been leaving her gifts. Wisely, she's pretty wary of Chuck, but when he claims to be trying to do better/be a better person, she gives him a chance. There's a random creepy janitor who looks like the prime suspect as Josie's stalker, but Chuck ends up being the 'guilty party' (though he maintains his innocence). Consequently, he and Josie are 'over' as quickly as they began. However, it's revealed at the end that Cheryl was behind things, as we see her doing a sketch of herself with Josie that's just like the sketch Josie received earlier from her stalker. So, apparently Cheryl is kind of obsessed (and maybe in love?) with Josie after she saved her from Nick St. Clair (hey, Cheryl? Veronica, Valerie and Melody helped save you/kick the crap out of Nick too. At least distribute your stalking equally/fairly between all four of your rescuers, mkay?). 



The final tale is 'Betty & Veronica'. Betty has it in her head that Sheriff Clueless is the Black Hood on account of how else could he have gotten into the jail to off the Sugar Man? Veronica is skeptical, and warns her not to pursue it...but, of course, Betty ignores her. Veronica agrees to help just to keep her out of trouble, then gets roped into breaking and entering the house of Sheriff Clueless, goes down into the creepy basement (despite making it abundantly clear to Betty she didn't want to. I was amused by the use of split-screen during their phone conversation), then finds Sheriff Clueless working out without a shirt on (because of course there has to be shirtlessnes - even if it isn't Archie or Jughead). Veronica makes a crack about Archie having to watch his back now that she's seen the sheriff without his shirt on. It was creepy enough, but I'm glad it didn't get creepier with the sheriff thinking she was coming onto him or something. Anyway, they eventually follow Sheriff Shirtless to a hotel and then are surprised to find he's meeting the mayor there for sexytimes.



Eventually, the three tales vaguely intersect when the three pairs of characters (Archie & Jughead, Josie & Cheryl, Betty & Veronica) all end up at the retro diner (though they don't interact) and Pop receives a call from the Black Hood saying there'll be a reckoning on account of everyone 'failing' his test. I have to say, although I admire the show trying to 'change up' their episode format this early into the series (usually it's not until a show has at least had a few seasons that they switch things up a bit from the 'formula'), I didn't find it that great. There were mildly interesting parts here and there, and I appreciate that they put some effort into creating a creepy atmosphere throughout the episode, but given what was said in the text at the beginning, I was expecting more 'horror movie' stuff, but all we got was mildly unsettling stuff instead. It felt like a 'filler' episode, as all that we really learned was that Jughead is running errands for the Serpent lawyer (quite possibly delivering drugs), Josie has a stalker who it turns out is Cheryl, and B & V discovered that Sheriff Shirtless and the mayor are gettin' it on. None of that is particularly earth-shattering. Maybe the show will have better luck next time it tries something 'gimmicky' like this for an episode. Here's hoping, anyway.

I was somewhat amused by Jughead voiceovering about Archie and Veronica having sexytimes all over the place. Too bad Archie had to say those three little words ("I love you.") and ruin the moment, especially since Veronica wasn't ready to say them back (tough luck, Archiekins). They each talk to their parents about it, and I was also amused when Veronica's mum was saying they liked having Archie around/close to Veronica because "He's brawny and devoted to you." (implying that he could act as a human shield if she becomes a target, since her parents have been receiving threatening letters). She also suggests to her daughter that maybe she just wasn't ready yet to hear what Archie told her. Meanwhile, Jugdad is getting realeased from jail and Betty's mum is there along with Bughead, making snarky comments (as she does). I thought it was pretty funny when all four were at Pop's and Jugdad did that pinky raise as he drank his coffee.



While Cheryl has been mean/nasty in the past, this was the first episode where I really didn't like her very much. Firstly, she's in the girls' locker room with Josie (amusingly, it appears Cheryl must have red everything - as even her towel is red, while Josie's is the normal colour of towels) and informs Josie that her back looks like a "sailor's rope" because of the the tension knots, but it's just basically an excuse for her to give Josie a back massage, rubbing oil into her skin. Considering we found out last episode that Cheryl's developed weird/creepy/stalkerish feelings towards Josie, it sort of explains why Cheryl loses it and starts ranting at the creepy janitor (also from the previous episode) who interrupts their 'moment'. I felt a bit bad for the janitor (and judging by her expression, so did Josie). The second time Cheryl was really unlikeable in this episode was later on, after Jugdad had gotten a job at Pop's (because he claimed to be quitting the Serpents for good and wanting to go on the straight and narrow or whatever. I was amused by the sight of scruffy biker Jugdad in the Pop's uniform. It looked so wrong), and she found out Josie was going to be spending time with Chuck for a music thing (which Cheryl advised her against), then she purposely knocked a milkshake on the floor and very snidely told Jugdad to clean it up. Usually Cheryl amuses me - even when she's being bitchy - but not in this case, which was disappointing. 

Jughead isn't happy about this either, since his dad used to be King of the Serpents/respected, and he obviously wants to say something to Cheryl, but instead Betty convinces him they should throw Jugdad a 'retirement party' (any excuse to throw a party - hey, Betty? She seems to like doing those) since he's apparently quitting the Serpents. While doing her party planning, Betty asks Toni Topaz how she might become 'Serpent adjacent' (if not an actual Serpent). Apparently the trials for women are quite different to the ones guys have to go through. While Jughead had to stick his hand near rattlesnakes and get the crap beaten out of him, the girls have to...do a sexy pole dance? At some point Bughead ask Varchie to take over sleuthing duties, since Betty can't (not only because of the party planning but also since she accused Sheriff Shirtless last episode of being the Black Hood, she can't really go question him about anything). 

So, Varchie question Sheriff Clueless (thankfully, he has his shirt back on now), they find out about a murder house/devil’s house (which is where Tony Todd in the previous episode told Jughead the Riverdale Reaper murdered a family) and Betty later recognises it as the abandoned house Black Hood told her to go to in a previous episode as part of his game when he was illustrating that they are 'the same'. Varchie learn the story of the guy who killed the family (I was amused by Veronica saying now she regretted throwing Archie's gun in the river as they snuck around the creepy house), but then discover there was one family member who wasn't killed - a third kid. They think the Black Hood is the creepy janitor and he bolts, Archie grabs him, but Archie's soon convinced he isn't the Black Hood because of his eyes or whatever.

Then comes the Jugdad retirement party scene. Archie informs Veronica that he signed them up for a duet to sing 'that Donnie Darko song she loves', then corrects that, saying "or strongly like, at least", asking if she can even do that anymore - obviously still bitter about her not returning his "I love you". So they sing a duet while not in the best of moods. I'm annoyed that they think of it as 'that Donnie Darko song' when that's just a cover of the original one (damn it, kids these days), but their cover isn't too bad - it's probably the best thing Archie's sung. Veronica's good too...but then she can't handle it anymore and runs offstage, Archie follows and the crowd starts booing (who are you booing to? No one's there!). Then there's the really strange part where Betty decides she's going to take over singing the duet (which I guess is no longer a duet), she starts stripping and it turns into that dance the girls who want to be Serpents apparently have to do. The most bizarre thing about it, though (I mean, apart from the fact that this student is stripping in front of a bar full of adults leering at her), is that her singing continues when she hasn't even got her mouth open! So, apparently Betty has ventriloquist skills we weren't aware of until now. 



Given how much her mum was against Betty having anything to do with the Serpents, it's strange that Alice doesn't lose it and haul her daughter offstage (she just looks unhappy about it). Instead, Jugdad compliments Betty, applauding her, and then covers her up with his Serpent jacket before announcing that he isn't actually retiring from the Serpents after all. He gives a big speech and then reenacts the "You broke my heart" scene from The Godfather II (not that I've ever really watched that movie, but the scene is so often referenced in movies/shows that even I was able to get it) with Jughead, as he's found out his son did the one thing he was adamant he not do - which was make a deal with the 'Snake Charmer', Penny Peabody (who earlier in the episode kept insisting Jughead wasn't done making deliveries for her, going so far as to threaten Betty). Jughead realises he's ruined his dad's chances of 'getting out' from the Serpent life and this makes him want to push Betty away too - the classic "I don't want to hurt you/see you get hurt" move. Of course, he winds up hurting Betty anyway by basically breaking up with her. And as Bughead are breaking up, so are Varchie. It's not long, though, before Archie and Betty are looking at each other through their windows (Archie is, as always, shirtless. I think he was a number of times this episode). So, already they're moving on? So it would seem. That was fast.

The next episode is a Christmas episode (shutup, Jughead Voiceover) and Betty is seeing the Black Hood everywhere, including having one vision of him creepily crawling over a couch towards her in Santa getup (it was one of the creepier moments this show has done and the creepiest Black Hood has been, I think). 



Cheryl, who was thankfully back to being likeable again this episode (after being so unlikeable last episode), learns from her mum that they're not going to be able to afford much this Christmas. Also, apparently they did rescue creepy grandma Blossom from the fire after all, since she's alive and well (well...maybe not 'well', but she's alive and creepy as ever). Cheryl decides to stick it to her mum by going out and spending money on things they can't afford, including a Christmas tree. She first asks Archie, but he's too busy and sticks her with some other guy I'm sure she was much less interested in buying a tree from...and yet, she does buy one - which, naturally, ticks off her mum. I got a good laugh out of what she had to say to her terrible mum (calling her as much) and the fact that we got to hear Cheryl's middle name was just a bonus. It was so good to have Cheryl back to doing what she does best - spouting great oneliners and being wickedly amusing. Less amusing, though, was creepy grandma saying to Cheryl's mum that she should've drowned 'them' (I guess meaning both Cheryl and Jason - hey, at least she got half her wish) 'like a basket of kittens'. And with that line, she made me want her dead. 




Cheryl's not the only one with financial woes, as Archie's dad informs him of the medical bill he just received that is $86, 000 (I remember the exact number because it gets mentioned several times throughout the episode. I also remember finding it funny when Archie's reaction to hearing the number was like "Dollars?". No, Archie, 86, 000 bottles of maple syrup. First rum, now dollars...what reality does Archie live in where he has to clarify what people mean when they say these words?). Things are awkward between Archie and Veronica since they sort-of broke up, but after learning about his money problems, she asks her parents if they can help - or rather she starts to and they cut her off mid-sentence, telling her in no uncertain terms the answer is 'no'. So she goes behind their backs, uses her mum's credit card (allowing us to hear what her mum's full name is - Hermione Apollonia Lodge - which makes two characters whose full names we hear uttered this episode) to pay the medical bill and once they find out, she gets them to agree to let her be part of the family business if she promises to stop acting like 'daddy's little girl' and be a proper partner in the business...or something. She also makes them promise 'nothing illegal' (which they maintain they never have done) and that their paying the medical bill for Archie's dad stands. 

Things are also awkward between Bughead (I guess they're ex-Bughead now), Jugdad’s taking over the Serpents, and Jughead wants to take care of Penny Peabody, so he has his fellow Serpents kidnap her (again wearing those stupid snake masks that don't scare anybody), dumping her in Greendale and telling her never to come back. Then Jughead shows how hardcore he's gotten by having her held down as he presumably cuts off her Serpent tattoo (we don't really see much, but that's what is implied). Meanwhile, Betty and Archie (Barchie?) have found out that the creepy janitor is the third kid of the murdered family, he says he ID'd the guy responsible for his family's murder and a bunch of guys offed the dude. They learn Cheryl's creepy grandma was one of the ones responsible for that. They pay her a visit, Cheryl's acting all happy about her creepy grandma getting visitors (since she apparently doesn't get them very often - gee, I wonder why), creepy grandma still thinks Betty is Polly, she says the killer guy was buried alive and somewhere along the line it's revealed that the wrong person was killed/mistakenly ID'd as the killer. Cheryl's creepy grandma sounds like she's gotten overwhelmed or whatever and Cheryl's like "Get out, vultures" after Barchie's line of questioning.

Before they go to dig up the spot where the guy was buried alive, Barchie snog (though it's more of an impulsive, 'we're about to do something dangerous' sort of thing), they go to the spot, dig it up, find an empty coffin, Black Hood appears, aims a gun at Betty's head, says he’ll kill her if Archie doesn’t get in the coffin and once he does get in, Black Hood makes Betty start burying him as she asks questions, they hear sirens, she whacks Black Hood with the shovel, he runs, dropping his gun, they catch up with him as he's about jump over a bridge, Archie aims the gun and tells him to stop, then it looks like he shoots him...but it's actually Sheriff Clueless who apparently wasn't so clueless this time around, as he got there just in the nick of time. They unmask Black Hood to reveal...it’s the creepy janitor (he'd cut off his own finger and sent it to Betty in a box earlier, claiming to be Black Hood holding the janitor guy hostage, when in fact it was him all along...or was it? Their theory is he cut off his own finger he used to accuse the wrong guy of killing his family, but I highly doubt the creepy janitor - who was only recently introduced in the show - was the real Black Hood).

Anyway, to everyone else it looks like the ordeal is over with. Varchie at some point rekindle their relationship and snog under the mistletoe, but there's the earlier Barchie snogging still looming over everything which I'm sure Cheryl will use to her advantage at some point in the future (since she witnessed it from her window when it happened). Speaking of Cheryl, I was amused when she came downstairs, found a Santa hat on the floor, called out "Santa?" (sounding like what I imagine a kid would if they came downstairs on Christmas morning) and then it was revealed her mum was bonking who I think was the guy looking for a Christmas tree earlier. Cheryl's face really said it all. 

Betty almost pepper sprays Polly, who’s in her bedroom and has apparently already had her cousin's twins (that was fast), which she's decided to name...Juniper and Dagwood? I guess she wanted to keep up Riverdale's tradition of unusual names. Betty's reaction pretty much sums it up.



Polly's living with a cult on a 'farm' and is totally over having to deal with her parents. Betty lets her mum know that her sister and her offspring are fine, but Alice isn't very happy she was left out, so then Betty (who's always on the lookout for something to make her new personal mission) decides to find her long lost bro she found out about at the end of last season...and I guess she thinks he'll be a substitute for Polly in her mum's life or something? Anyway, the two of them manage to track him down and he's apparently into some seedy webcamming stuff, but also pissed that Alice gave him up, so then he yells and kicks them out, Betty’s mum cries in the car and she comforts her, then when Betty goes to visit her bro towards the end of the episode, there's some dude attacking him, cutting his arm (it was pretty nasty-looking), and Betty (being the do-gooder she is) brings him back home. After some arguing with her father, they patch him up and...let him sleep in Polly's room. WTF? There's just been a serial killer out there and they let someone they don't even know stay with them? As if proving my point, the episode ends with Creepy McCreeperson walking into Betty's room as she sleeps and leaning in close over her, staring creepily. 

Meanwhile, the Southside school Jughead's at has been shut down, naturally the troublesome Serpent students are going to Riverdale and it cracked me up how Cheryl gets her dramatic slow-mo entrance as she comes down the stairs (Veronica's reaction in particular was priceless), saying her lot doesn’t want Southsiders there. She and Toni exchange words, New Reggie's back to being a jerk (actually, I don't think he ever stopped. It's just sometimes he's less of a jerk), siding with Cheryl who wants Veronica and her lot to do the same, then she blackmails Archie to get Veronica on her side, otherwise she'll tell her about the Barchie snog she witnessed in the previous episode. 




Southsiders 'ruining' her school isn't the only thing Cheryl's dealing with. She's also having to cope with the fact that her mum's basically become a prostitute at this point. Her reaction to her mum telling her she actually enjoys it is pretty funny.



Cheryl figures the way to put an end to this grossness is to get more money, so she wants another cheque from Nick St. Clair (since her mum burned the last one). Archie is her best shot at getting it. This is good news for him, because he needs a cover story to go see Nick (and find out whether Veronica's parents had anything to do with his 'accident') on account of some FBI agent guy approaching him, saying he needs Archie's help in bringing down Veronica's dad (agreeing to keep Archie's dad, and later Veronica, out of it). So Archie's going to go pay Nick (who has two broken legs in casts) a visit, under the guise that he's just there to get another cheque for Cheryl. However, prior to his visit, Cheryl informs him that Nick almost forced himself on Veronica (this was something she genuinely thought he already knew, but he didn't, as Veronica never told him). Naturally, Archie wants to make Nick pay, and while he starts off just applying pressure to Nick's legs, he winds up eventually pummeling his face after Nick mouths off about Veronica (the most interesting Archie ever gets is when he's punching thing - ice, Nick St. Clair's face, etc). Once Cheryl gets the cheque, she gives it to her mum in the hope that she won't have to 'provide comfort and companionship to the lonely men of Riverdale' (her mum's words), but he mum doesn't want to give up her new 'job'. Poor Cheryl. 

The most annoying storyline this episode? Jughead's. He's all 'anti-conformist' to the principal's rules, a Serpent insignia winds up painted over the school's emblem on the floor (to me it seemed like New Reggie was behind it just to get the Southside students into trouble), the principal bans the Serpent's from wearing their jackets, Jughead gets riled up, proceeds to rant (for basically the entire episode), there's a fight at one point, Toni and Sweet Pea are forced to where a uniform of sorts (or at least the top half, anyway) and then Jughead finally conforms...but it's all an elaborate ruse! He's just using a cover story with the principal about starting a D&D club or whatever when in fact it's a club for the Serpents so they can still be Serpents at school...or something. Honestly, it was just a big dumb storyline and Jughead was at his most insufferable. I can't even recall really what Veronica gets up to this episode, but it would appear the Southside school being shut down is so her family can buy the land (and the mayor's involved too).

The next episode is all about 'Pickens Day', which is a day that Riverdale celebrates some historical figure, but Toni helps Jughead come to the realisation that the guy isn't what everyone's made him out to be. It's basically the Jebediah Springfield episode of The Simpsons...but done in a more serious way. It's overly preachy, about as subtle as a sledgehammer and pretty much everyone involved in that storyline comes across as annoying. Josie and Josie's mum are basically as bad as each other, as Josie's mum tells her enough that she turns on Veronica (who wants them to sing together at the celebration, but Josie refuses, acting all bitchy), but neglects to mention to her daughter all the shady dealings and affairs she herself is involved in. I was so happy when Veronica ended up taking Josie's place as lead singer with the other two Pussycats (Valerie and Melody had every reason to join Veronica, since Josie dumped them the second she thought she had solo career prospects...which didn't actually end up going so well for her, then she wanted them back, but thankfully they weren't having any of that). 



The other character, besides Veronica, who managed to remain non-annoying this episode was Cheryl, who feels bad once she learns her distant relation funded the dude everyone's celebrating who was actually a bad guy. She even sides with Jughead and his fellow protestors when they interrupt the celebration while her mum clearly couldn't care less and is too busy pursuing Betty's dad...which, ew. Also, every time Betty's dad rants about Polly to his family - on account of him not liking Betty's long-lost newly-found brother - it sounds like he's saying "Paulie" instead of "Polly", I noticed. And speaking of names, Betty's bro is apparently named Chic...and that's one of the more bizarre names this show has had. The actor who plays him reminds me of Dave Franco. Chic's also a bad influence on Betty, as he's now got her donning her 'Dark Betty' wig and doing his creepy webcam stuff - I'm not even sure I fully understand what it involves...nor do I think I want to. Betty's too nice to her jerk of a bro, giving him a computer and webcam to replace the ones he lost due to being kicked out of whatever seedy place he was staying out. This is after she'd already helped him stay alive when he'd been cut pretty bad and was bleeding everywhere last episode. The dude's an ungrateful ass (plus creepy-looking). While he admits to watching her sleep, she doesn't ask him any follow-up questions. I guess she was too busy being seduced by the world of webcamming to really care. They bond over both having 'darkness' inside them or whatever.

Jughead's annoying as usual (too bad he couldn't leave that tape across his mouth so he'd SHUT UP for a while), and Archie's stuck in a stupid storyline where the FBI agent guy wants him to get Veronica's dad to trust him, he asks her what her dad's interests are and she says wrestling, then in no time flat Archie's joined the wrestling team. He sucks at it at first and Veronica's dad isn't impressed (I was amused by his thinly-veiled insults towards Archie and saying how he used to worry about Archie and Veronica being in her room together, but after seeing his attempts at wrestling, he wasn't so worried anymore. Though Archie gets him back - not only because Veronica goes on about how 'sexy' Archie is when singing or whatever, but also with the snog he gives her right in front of her dad's face). Later, though, I guess Archie's determination to win over Veronica's dad gives him the necessary strength to beat wrestling champ, Chuck (though I don't mind Archie beating him, no matter how implausible it might be, since Chuck remains a jerk). In the end, Archie manages to impress Veronica's dad and he asks Archie how he'd like to start his business tutelage. What a mix of boring and annoying this episode was.

These two episodes just kind of blended together for me (since I watched them in a row). I know that with the first one it's Veronica's 'Confirmation Ceremony', which is apparently a religious rite of sorts meant to represent 'coming of age' or whatever. She goes to confession (which is of little help to her, since she wants advice about what she should do, as she's been lying to Archie and getting him involved in her family's shady business), works at a soup kitchen (though it was funny when she took time off mid-serving to chat to Archie...who also stepped away. Great service, guys!) and gets decked out in a white dress that could've easily been mistaken for a wedding dress (I wondered if this was the intention and whether it was shown in promos for the episode when it originally aired, designed to make viewers thing Ronnie was getting married. Mostly, though, it just had me worried she might get shot or something since shows like this seem to never want to pass up the opportunity to stain lovely white clothes with lots of blood). I was amused when she asked Josie whether she knew 'Bittersweet Symphony' from the Cruel Intentions soundtrack instead of just saying "by The Verve". 

Speaking of Josie, her and her mum apologise to Veronica and Hermione for how they've been towards them. Clearly Josie doesn’t want to sing at Veronica's Confirmation, but says she will, then Veronica says she was going to, so it ends up becoming a duet. The FBI agent guy wants Archie to get info to incriminate Veronica's dad, so Archie gets himself invited to a poker game. One of the guys (who I recognised from Lost as one of 'The Others') is a real nasty jerk to Pop about his food, Veronica's father at least tells him to apologise, then the jerk meets with another guy and they discuss taking down Veronica's dad - which Archie overhears while he's cleaning the toilets. Archie tells Veronica's dad about this and, naturally, the jerk winds up dead (though Veronica's dad claims innocence when Archie asks whether he had anything to do with it). While all this was going on, Veronica tells the mayor her parents were going to get her kicked out of office (I think her doing the sheriff was going to play a part in that), but due to Veronica giving her a heads-up, she steps down instead before they have a chance to.

At one point the FBI agent guy wants Archie to wear a wire around Veronica's dad, but he refuses and instead tells Veronica's dad about the FBI agent guy, saying he gave the guy no incriminating evidence. He asks him to help out his dad, who the FBI agent guy was threatening, and Veronica's dad tells him it'll all be fine. Later, Archie's picked up by Replacement Smithers and driven out to the middle of nowhere. I was surprised Archie didn't try to knock Replacement Smithers out or something, since it was looking more and more likely that he was about to be 'taken care of' in the Mafia sense. Just as well he didn't, though, since it turns out Veronica's mum is there to meet him. She tells Archie that the FBI agent guy was all just an elaborate ruse to see whether he'd buckle under pressure and betray Veronica's dad or not. He didn't, so he passed the test and is now part of the family apparently. 

Elsewhere, Penny the Serpent lawyer/'Snake Charmer' returns, is pissed at what Jughead did to her and wants the same done to him since the Serpents are going to get kicked out of their trailer park due to them looking like the ones responsible for the head of the statue being cut off at the end of the previous episode. She basically says Jughead's crap and Jugdad is not happy to learn Jughead cut off her tattoo. Eventually, though, Jughead works out Tall Boy was the one responsible for the decapitated statue and consequently he gets what I assume was basically the same treatment as Penny did. 

Betty comes home to find a dead shady guy who stopped by looking for her bro, and then she's helping her mum clean up the mess (Chic is pretty much useless the entire time), they roll the body in a rug and dump it in a sewer pipe, Betty eventually tells Jughead, he helps sink the car that belonged to the dead shady guy, as it had been parked outside for days and was attracting attention (though it takes a while before it starts sinking and Bughead look worried), he then tells his dad who helps bury the body (since he has experience, what with Jason Blossom and all). He even uses stuff that he tells them will get rid of all the evidence...even the shady guy's teeth. At one point Jughead asks Betty if she’d been with anyone while they were broken up, after saying he did stuff with Toni ("but not everything"), but she lies. Contrast this with Archie, who 'fesses up to Veronica that he snogged Betty, but Veronica seems to understand it was just a thing that happened in the moment when they thought they might die or whatever. I was mostly interested in Cheryl this episode, as she finds out about her mum and Betty's dad, she's nice to Betty (who snaps at her) and we even get to see Cheryl practicing archery! She's just the best.

Jughead's voiceovering about Betty being stuck in the house with her creepy bro. But living with Chic is nothing compared to living with Cheryl's mum, who Cheryl is suitably disgusted to hear apparently has 'real feelings' for Betty's dad, she voices her disgust, but then is the victim of her mum's verbal abuse. She really is a nasty piece of work, so it's no wonder Cheryl is the way she is. 



Meanwhile, Veronica and her dad are talking about her and Archie going to the family lake house, he wants Replacement Smithers to be there keeping an eye on her, but she's not having it. So then her dad takes Archie off to go talk to in private, saying Replacement Smithers will be there (but Veronica will not know about it) and that it remains a secret between him and Archie. Veronica is soon inviting Bughead to go with her and Archie to the lake house, Cheryl overhears and invites herself, but Veronica informs her it's just for romantic couples. As bitchy as Cheryl can be, I did feel sorry for her here, as she sounded so eager to join them, obviously feeling pretty lonely and in need of some companionship after her mum's verbal smackdown. She tries to not show that being left out bothers her, but clearly it does. I think it's the mark of a really good actress when they can manage to make you feel sympathy for their character who's been pretty mean to the 'good guys', having given each of them a hard time at different points. Madelaine Petsch pulls it off.

Before Bughead leaves, Jughead meets Chic and he can tell right away the dude is a creeper. Even if he was incredibly thick and wasn't getting a bad vibe off him before, he surely would've been getting a bad vibe after Chic makes a veiled threat against Betty and her mum (after checking Jughead won't spill the beans on the dead body/coverup, Chic makes a point of saying it'd be bad for the two Cooper women if he did). Betty's naturally in a hurry to get away from her creepy bro who just does his best psycho stare as Bughead leave. They eventually reach the 'Lodge Lodge' as Veronica calls it, and after she shoos away Replacement Smithers (who tells Archie privately that he's just a phone call away), I was amused that not only did she leave Archie carrying all the bags, but not even Jughead or Betty bothered to help him carry any of them even though he's loaded up like a packhorse. Also amusing? That Bughead can hear Varchie making squeaky bed noises in the room next door to them. Bughead get them back later on, though, by subjecting them to the same (Betty even pulls out her 'Dark Betty' wig to help get Jughead in the making-squeaky-bed-noises mood. She also points out that out of the four of them, only Archie and Jughead haven't snogged, which is her way of letting Jughead know that she and Veronica snogged back in the first episode of the show during their cheerleading tryouts).



Before that^ happens, though, Cheryl lives up to her 'Bombshell' moniker, dropping the Barchie snog on Jughead via phone call. We get it from two perspectives. The first is from Jughead's and his reaction after. He's not happy at first, but eventually calms down (after all the crazy stuff he's gotten up to, he can't really hold it against Betty). Then we see what happens on Cheryl's end after she hangs up. Toni enters the ladies toilets and basically asks if Cheryl had a good reason for doing that or whether she just likes to stir up trouble. Obviously it's the second one. After Jughead is seemingly 'okay' with the Barchie snog, the 'core four' are in a hot tub together and Veronica reassures Bughead that once she learned of the Barchie snog, she eventually got over it. Though it appears that's not quite the case, since she then suggests that to even things out, she and Jughead should snog. Clearly Archie and Betty are opposed to this idea, but then Jughead actually starts using ship names and saying how he could one day in the future use the Barchie snog against Betty if they're having a fight or whatever, and this is his logic for why a 'Vughead' (which, to me, sounds too close to 'fuckhead'. 'Jeronica' sounds slightly less...insulting?) snog should happen - which it does...for an uncomfortably long time. Certainly longer than the Barchie snog was. Later, Archie's not in the mood for making more squeaky bed noises with Veronica. 

After all that^ has transpired, Veronica learns of Replacement Smithers having not actually gone away like she'd wanted him to and she's pissed Archie knew about it, so she gives Replacement Smithers a message to deliver back to her dad, says she needs space/time away from Archie and goes into town with Betty to buy stuff. While they're at a convenience store, she talks with Betty about her and Jughead making squeaky bed noises the previous night. Betty informs her she wore the same outfit that night she got revenge on Chuck in the hot tub, then mentions that it wasn't her and Jughead's 'first time', as that was back on the night of Veronica's Confirmation Ceremony. Veronica flirts with the store clerk, but Betty reminds her she's still in a relationship with Archie despite their fight. While this is going on, Archie and Jughead are in the woods together and maybe some slash fic writers were hoping the two of them would make what Betty tells Jughead to say to Cheryl (when she thinks it's her calling again to stir up more trouble) a reality.



Instead, though, Archie and Jughead just have a conversation about the snogging (including whether Archie knew about the Beronica snog from the first episode of the show). Jughead then proceeds to confuse Archie when he talks about how Betty is Archie’s best friend, his best friend’s girlfriend, and his girlfriend’s best friend. As for the phone call, it's not from Cheryl, but rather Jugdad who informs his son that the Serpent trailer park (that they were getting evicted from) has been bought by Veronica's dad and they can now stay. Naturally, they're celebrating...but Jughead's all about his conspiracy theories and gets mad at Veronica because of her dad, saying he's only bought the trailer park as part of his 'tactic' or whatever. The other three don't buy into his conspiracy theories. 

While Monopoly has be known to lead to fighting at times, it takes things to a whole new level when the foursome are playing the game, Betty gets a call from her mum, steps away, Jughead tells Varchie about creepy Chic, Betty returns and says her mum called to say Veronica's dad has bought the Riverdale newspaper, then things all go to hell due to this news adding fuel to the fire that is Jughead's conspiracy theories. He launches into yet another rant, everyone starts arguing (most of it was a jumble, but I do recall Jughead being condescending towards Archie/basically calling him dumb and Veronica insulting Betty's 'roleplaying' getup and her need for it with Jughead, while Betty questions why Veronica really brought them up to the lake house), but then the fight is interrupted by four masked intruders who resent these 'rich' folks and are robbing the place. They want Veronica's wallet (don't they mean purse?), she leads one upstairs, surreptitiously presses the silent alarm, she says she recognises the clerk from the convenience store, then once back downstairs the gang are ordered onto their knees and one of the intruders grabs a baseball bat, but before he can do anything they hear the phone ring, it's the security company, the store clerk grabs Veronica's necklace, all four intruders bolt, Archie gives chase after the one who stole Veronica's necklace (baseball bat in hand), catches up with him and is about to do what he does best - deliver a pummeling - but then Replacement Smithers shows up and says he'll take care of it, Archie wonders what he's going to do, but doesn't really get much of an answer until he leaves and hears a gunshot.

After the night they've just had, Jughead's not so concerned with the Barchie snog anymore, he's forgiven Betty but warns her at the end of the episode to be careful about her creepy bro. Elsewhere, Archie is talking with Veronica's dad who asks him how he felt about what Replacement Smithers did to the store clerk, and Archie's roundabout way of answering is to tell him that he regretted hesitating when he was aiming the gun at the Black Hood (though now he's not entirely convinced it was the real Black Hood) on the bridge and if the sheriff hadn't shot the guy, he would've gotten away. Veronica's dad tells him to never hesitate and Archie's gives him Veronica's necklace he got back from the store clerk.

This^ was a pretty interesting storyline for the 'core four' this episode. It had some humour, some drama, progressed relationships, had secrets brought out into the open and was generally quite entertaining. I was less interested in Josie telling Kevin (against her mum's wishes) about the secret affair her mum and Kevin's dad are having. As usual, Josie just does what makes her feel better, not really caring about how it affects Kevin (though she does apologise later). A bit more interesting was Cheryl agreeing to go see a movie with Toni who invites her after running into her alone at the theatre. Cheryl appears to get emotional when watching the movie and later tells Toni about how she once had a friend named Heather who she let sleep in bed with her, but her mum found out and called her a 'deviant', destroying her daughter's chance of being with the one she loved who also loved her back. I thought it was slightly amusing when, before Cheryl mentioned who it was she was referring to, Toni automatically assumed she was talking about Jason. I mean, I myself automatically assumed from the first scene in the very first episode of the show that Cheryl and Jason had a 'twincest' thing going on, but so far the only 'incest' there's been was Polly and Jason. I thought it would've been funny if after Toni said "You mean your brother Jason? I heard how close you guys were.", Cheryl had been like, "What? Ew, no! WHY does everyone think we had twincesty feelings for each other when we didn't?! God!". This was the most I've liked Toni - being a friend to Cheryl (which means she's now back to being above Josie - who's still boring - on the likability scale). 



I wasn't as fussed on the following episode. It seemed to have too much going on and I found it a tad confusing. What I was able to follow was that after a private chat with Veronica's parents, Archie's dad decides he's going to run for mayor (which seemed to come out of nowhere, but he claims he always wanted to). Archie doesn't want his dad getting in deeper with the Lodges, so he asks Josie to get her mum (the former mayor) to convince his dad not to run. Meanwhile, Jughead learns from Archie that Veronica's dad bought Pop's retro diner back in the second episode of this season and, naturally, this sets Jughead off on one of his tangents, saying how Veronica's dad is buying up all the land, he asks Pop about the diner being bought but he claims that if his mum caught wind of this, it'd break her heart (and she hasn't got that much longer anyhow. Considering Pop's age...just how old is she? 100?), so because he's occasionally a considerate person, Jughead doesn't print the story he was going to. However, we then see Pop reporting back to Veronica's dad about Jughead asking questions, he appears to be royally pissed, but Veronica covers by saying that she told Jughead about him buying the diner (her excuse is that she was giving him the 'smallest truth' she could to distract him from discovering bigger ones), when in fact it was Archie who'd done so...which she yells at him for (it was funny as she was doing so, because of course Archie was shirtless, as he always seems to be, and I'm sure at her eyes drifted down his torso at least once as she was giving him an earful. Such is the power of Archie shirtlessness, apparently).

While all this^ is going on, Polly returns home with her twins (whose names she hasn't decided to change from Juniper and Dagwood for some strange reason), when Betty walks in and sees her mum and Chic holding one twin each, despite Alice being closer, Betty heads straight to Chic and takes the one he's holding because she's realising more and more just how damn creepy he is and doesn't want him touching her niece or nephew. Although she discusses his creepiness with Polly, she doesn't bother giving her mum the memo which later leads to Alice letting Chic take the twins out for a nightly stroll. Polly starts freaking out and when Chic returns with the twins, she asks what he did to them, but he claims he's done nothing and they're fine. Before that, though, Betty's dad sits the family down and says he wants to divorce Alice, but they later find out the reason he wants to do so is because he's thinking he's going to inherit money from Cheryl's dead dad (since Betty's dad's side of the family are Blossoms) and doesn't want Alice to get any of it. Speaking of Cheryl's dead dad, I was amused by her reaction to hearing about the reading of his will. I also continued to enjoy her interaction with Toni (who's much more likeable when interacting with Cheryl than she was when interacting with Jughead, picking fights with Betty or driving a wedge between Bughead). 

At the will reading, it says anyone who proves with medical authentication that they have Blossom blood in their veins will get a cut of the inheritance, Alice interrupts once she figures out what Betty's dad is up to with wanting to get a divorce, much arguing ensues, Toni seems to be enjoying the drama, Alice wins Line of the Episode when she calls Cheryl's mum a "half-melted ten cent trollop", Cheryl attempts to calm everybody down, and then it appears her dad has returned from the grave (looking better than Cheryl's dead brother did, at least) and consequently she faints. I was amused when she awoke and said, "Oh, mumsy. I had the most frightful daymare." (it cracks me up that she says 'mumsy'), but it turns out her dad isn't a zombie (much to my disappointment), nor did he somehow fake his death. He's dead for really reals, and this guy who looks almost exactly like him (except for the bad wig) is in fact his twin brother, Claudius, who Cheryl knew nothing about. Apparently the Blossoms have twins running all through their family from generation to generation and he gives some explanation to how this hasn't been brought up before (probably because the writers pulled it out of their arses. The secret twin brother was too good of a trope to pass up, it would seem).






Later when he's having dinner with the Blossoms, Toni's also there and Cheryl's mum is rude to her once more (she was rude to her earlier when Cheryl informed her she was inviting Toni to the will reading for 'emotional support'), telling Cheryl's uncle to 'ignore that person'. He tells a tale that ends with the word 'Lesbos', which causes Toni to laugh while she's in the middle of eating her soup and also amuses Cheryl. It's soon revealed which twin was the 'evil' one (or, rather 'more evil' one, since Cheryl's dad wasn't exactly the 'good' one either) when later on he's discussing with Cheryl's mum how he wants revenge on the Lodges, but she mentions something about first creepy grandma and then Cheryl - implying they're going to 'take care' of both Mob/Lodge-style, which Cheryl overhears. 



Betty, being proactive in her determination to find out what her creepy bro's deal is, finds some dental floss he used (although kind of gross, I'm glad that's what it turned out to be, as for a minute there I thought they were going to say it was one of his hairs and my response to that would've been, "Boy, that's certainly one thick hair strand.", but that wasn't the case). Chic's a dick to Betty about being in 'his' bathroom (firstly...they have multiple bathrooms? And secondly, since when does the new person in the house get to claim a bathroom? He uses the other one all the time, so Betty should've had words to him about claiming a bathroom as his own, but I guess she was too focused on getting the DNA test). Once she finds out he's been lying about who he is, she asks him point-blank. While that's happening, Archie’s dad - who's decided he’s running for mayor despite Archie's various attempts to convince him not to - eventually finds out the reason the Lodges want to buy up all the Southside properties is to make the school into a prison and that will create jobs...or something. Archie's dad wants no part of it, but Archie's suddenly changed his tune and stays behind to listen to what Veronica's dad has to say. After going to so much trouble to get his dad out of being involved with the Lodges, Archie makes a blood pact with Veronica's dad (they do the typical opening-up-palms-with-a-knife thing, which always seems to be played like it's no big deal, when really they should be having some sort of reaction to such a big gash in their hands. Papercuts sting like a bitch, just imagine something much bigger and how much that'd hurt) and he's welcomed into the Lodge family (Archie even tosses into the fireplace the book he was keeping notes in about Veronica's dad when he was supposed to find something incriminating for the fake FBI agent guy).

Cheryl invites Toni, Betty, Veronica and Josie to her house for a sleepover because she doesn't feel safe there - and who can blame her, considering her mum and uncle are plotting behind her back to get rid of both her and her creepy grandma. While the others sleep on the floor, Toni gets to sleep in bed with Cheryl who admits she didn't really want to invite the others, she only wanted to invite Toni, but had to provide a cover because her mum wouldn't have allowed her to only invite Toni. They share a 'moment'. Cheryl had earlier feared her mum and uncle were poisoning her creepy grandma's tea, but she hears a crash and discovers her creepy grandma has had an 'accident'/'fallen' down the stairs. So it appears her fears have been proven right (take THAT, those who doubted her sanity! *coughJosiecough*). When her creepy grandma's able to be released from hospital, Cheryl pleads with the doctor not to send her home, but her mum catches her and drives her away. Later, Toni pays a visit to the Blossom house, but Cheryl's mum is her typical rude self to Toni and informs her Cheryl's gone off to a boarding school in Switzerland, before basically telling her to eff off. Cheryl is in fact locked up at the loony bin Polly was at, where she's got pigtails for some reason and is apparently going to be subjected to conversion therapy (since her mum believes she's a 'deviant'). 

Someone else who was having a pretty rough time this episode was Veronica. After previously standing up for Ethel (and other girls who Chuck mistreated), how does she repay Veronica? By throwing a milkshake in her face at school. I thought she'd forgiven Veronica for what her dad had done...but apparently not. Now she's holding Veronica responsible for her dad buying up land and wanting to build a prison where Southside school was at. I knew what was going to happen as soon as Ethel stormed up to Veronica with a drink in her hand. I was surprised Veronica didn't realise, even when Ethel started speaking and it became obvious she was not happy. It would've been good if Veronica had dodged, but I guess this was her 'paying the price' for being involved with her family's business. As if I didn't dislike Josie enough already, seeing her snickering away at Veronica's embarrassment just made me dislike her even more. I'm still waiting for Josie to suffer some embarrassment for the stuff she's done. I did cheer, however, when Veronica decked New Reggie for his lude comments. That was a heck of a punch.



Although Veronica promises Ethel's father a job at the new prison and promises Josie to help her meet Andy Cohen, both betray and lash out at her. Although I'll admit Veronica was deluding herself if she thought she was going to win over the students to vote for her as Student Body President, Ethel handing out flyers about Veronica with information intended to destroy her printed on them certainly didn't help (it also reminded me of the end of Cruel Intentions, which is funny since Veronica referenced that movie in a prior episode). I guess Ethel didn't get the memo about Veronica and Nick St. Clair's 'friendship' being donezo after he tried to force himself on her. What really annoyed me was Josie being revealed as the backstabber who supplied Ethel with her ammo. Clearly she can turn on anyone at any time, and just sides with whoever she feels can be of benefit to her (she already betrayed the other two Pussycats to further her personal gain, after all). So, Veronica's basically got the whole school against her, including Betty who learns from the flyers that Veronica knew about the school becoming a literal prison. 



Betty was already pretty ticked off on account of finding out Chic wasn't who he claimed, she then made it clear to him that she wasn't going to put up with his creepy act (by hovering over him in bed - like he'd done with her - only she had the added bonus of flicking a Zippo lighter on and off for extra intimidation), Kevin ratted her out to Chic (because she'd enlisted Kevin's help in finding out info about Chic last episode with her 'catfishing' scheme...and because Kevin's obviously not thinking with his upstairs brain, since he believes Chic isn't so bad), Chic went through her stuff, found the 'Dark Betty' wig (he claimed he was looking for the Zippo to back up his story to Alice) and gave the wig to Betty's mum, who's now siding with Chic against her own daughter and is pissed to learn that Bughead are bumping uglies. When Betty and her mum are having a talk in private (after Alice has checked that Betty's being 'safe' with Jughead), Betty asks her if Chic could be Jugdad's kid because apparently Alice couldn't resist the allure of the Jones men either (ew, that makes it sound like she was interested in Jughead too). 

Speaking of Jughead...he should've been pretty weak due to hunger, as he's been on a hunger strike protesting the Southside school becoming a prison. His dad does eventually bring him food when his friends have taken a break (cheaters!). Jughead's protest comes to an end when Archie cuts his chains and he's led away. As for Archie, he'd been mad at his dad who's got a contract of some description with the Lodges. Archie's mum (who was back in town) yelled at her son for disrespecting his dad, gave a big speech, then stormed off. Archie made a deal with Veronica’s dad that he'd stop Jughead's protest if he let his dad out of the contract he had with the Lodges. In the end, Archie’s dad decided to run for mayor against Veronica’s mum (who's also running for mayor. I think that development happened in one of the previous episodes). On the whole, I didn't really like this episode much.

The next episode was a bit better. Cheryl watches a movie on a projector while she's in the loony bin, there's black & white footage of Kevin and Moose who are about to go skinny-dipping. Jughead voiceovers that she's imagining her friends or something. Conversion therapy's imminent, but before that, one of the nasty nuns makes Cheryl move heavy sacks of whatever from one place to another, then when Cheryl's basically done, the nasty nun says she didn't listen and she tells her to move all of them to a different place. Meanwhile, Toni's worked out something's not right, discusses going to rescue Cheryl with Veronica and Josie, but then Josie bails on them once she learns from Cheryl's mum that Cheryl was the one who drew the portrait of her (she shows Josie the one Cheryl drew of herself and Josie together), freaks out over the pig's heart that she had received (which was part of Cheryl's plan to make it seem like she had a creepy stalker and to get closer with Josie) and says she's 'out', thus abandoning her so-called 'friend' who's about to be subjected to conversion therapy. I understand being shocked about the whole stalker bit, but it's still messed up to leave someone she was supposedly best friends with to a fate worse than death. She could've put her own personal issues aside, helped get Cheryl out, then been mad and abandoned her or whatever. Also, I don't know why the writers even bothered with the Cheryl-as-Josie's-stalker thing since it only seemed to be for one episode (maybe two, if you count the interrupted locker room massage) and then was seemingly abandoned in favour of Cheryl taking an interest in Toni. They should've just left out the whole stalker plot point entirely.

Anyway, Veronica and Toni prove to be Cheryl's TRUE friends, as they go to save her (with help from Kevin) in the most impractical outfits for rescuing - as they are very booby...but, hey, they look great, so that's all that really matters. When Toni enters the room where Cheryl's watching a movie, they share a dramatic snog in front of the projector (I now officially prefer Toni to Josie, who's back to being my least favourite character in the show right alongside Chic), then Veronica reminds them they need to actually escape, which they do. I thought it was a bit odd how, at the end of the episode, after talking with Toni, Cheryl randomly jumped up, asked Kevin if he was making Carrie: The Musical, stated matter-of-factly that she would be Carrie White in a "Like, duh, of course I would be." sort of way, then said in an overdramatic way that the school was going to burn. I'm aware the next episode's a musical, but that was a very odd/abrupt (one might say 'forced') way of having a lead-in to it. We also learned this episode that Toni is short for Antoinette (when she was called out of class by Cheryl’s creepy grandma, who Cheryl’s mum left home alone with nothing to do but watch TV after basically threatening her, and she fell on the floor to get to the phone to call Toni, gave her enough information so that she and Veronica could figure out where Cheryl was, then the line was cut off by Cheryl’s uncle who it appeared was about to make creepy grandma pay. 



Chic claims he was 'just trying to help' and he's brought the g/f or whatever she is of the guy who Chic ended up offing (I recognised Azura Skye from numerous different things I've seen her in, but as usual, she's playing a character I couldn't like - though I don't think we were supposed to like her here. Still doesn't change the fact I don't think I've liked her in anything I've seen her in). Her name is Darla and she wants money in exchange for keeping her mouth shut about her dead b/f who she knows Chic killed while Betty and Alice covered it up. Betty goes to the bank, Alice manages to somehow make a call without Darla (or the guy who's turned up, who was also the one that cut Chic's arm and Betty saved him from using pepper spray...which the guy is apparently still smarting from) noticing and tells her not to come back to the house. We cut to Betty being at the house and the guy she pepper sprayed pulls a knife, but then Jughead and some of his fellow Serpents kick in the door, brandishing knives and I guess they manage to intimidate Darla and her offsider by outnumbering them...because none of them look like they could've taken on that big dude. They leave, but still get the money, so not a bad day's work for a couple of extortionists. Realising the sort of trouble Chic brings, Alice finally does what Betty's been suggesting for some time now and kicks him out of the house.

I was amused when Veronica's dad introduced Archie to Lenny & Carl (we've already got a Smithers...at this point, the show really needs to have Moose say to someone "Duh, stay out of Riverdale!" as another reference to The Simpsons. Hey, he could've said it to Chic after Alice kicked him out - that would've been perfect!), they want to make a deal with Veronica's dad, he refuses, they threaten, Archie threatens back (and they, understandably, laugh in his face. Though I did like Archie mentioning how he rearranged Nick St. Clair's face), but then later Replacement Smithers is attacked, Archie has reassembled his 'Red Circle'...except now they're wearing masks that make them look like Sub-Zero from Mortal Kombat and going by the name 'Dark Circle' (way to show creativity there, Archie. The name also conjures up images of those unwanted things people get under their eyes from lack of sleep), he chases after the attacker and finds it's fake FBI agent guy, Lenny & Carl are delivered a message from Veronica's dad to check on their car - which they find is on fire. A car that isn't on fire, however, is the brand new one the Lodges have bought for Archie (has he even gotten his license yet?), and Veronica's dad informs him he'll now be driving Miss Ronnie everywhere, replacing Replacement Smithers.

I hadn't even been aware that Carrie: The Musical was a thing until I caught wind of it when I accidentally spoiled myself for this episode of the show before reaching this episode on my Blu-rays. I've never heard any songs from the musical before, so they were all new to me. Some were pleasant enough to listen to, but none were particularly memorable. I'm certainly not humming any of the songs or anything after having watched the episode, as I've pretty much forgotten them. With the opening number, I thought Betty, Veronica and Cheryl were all quite good, but then it felt jarring when Archie started singing as his voice just didn't seem in the same league as theirs (at least not in that first song, anyway. It was less jarring in the later songs). Naturally, Cheryl is totally into playing Carrie White (especially since she appointed herself the perfect person to play the role), but others such as Josie and Ethel obviously aren't so happy about it. While I was surprised that Josie seemingly forgave Cheryl for her stalkerish behaviour because the two of them sung a song together (Cheryl was determined to get her forgiveness since the song they were singing together was meant to be about friendship and Josie couldn't hide her anger), I'm not sure it'll stick. I'm fully expecting Josie to let Cheryl know her true feelings at some point in the future (as much as Cheryl owed an apology to Josie for stalking her...funny that Josie never bothered saying "Sorry I left you to get conversion therapy."). 

Of course, it wasn't just the Cheryl and Josie relationship that was mended via song. Betty had still been holding a grudge against Veronica because she knew what her parents were up to and hadn't said anything. She even goes so far as to say Veronica is 'perfect' for the role of Chris (and if you've seen the movie, you know that isn't a compliment). However, after a chat with Archie (who asks why Betty's being so mean to his g/f) and B & V sharing a song, the two make amends and hug, back to being friends again - such is the power of musicals. Speaking of Archie, he's also being a bit of a jerk to his dad because Veronica's dad gave him a fancy car, but he knows his dad won't like it one bit and so he hasn't told him about it. Then later Veronica's dad purposely mentions it to Archie's dad with the intent of driving a wedge between them. However, after his dad tells him how he was looking forward to them getting some old car in need of fixing and that they could've fixed it up together, Archie gives Veronica's dad back the keys to the car he bought him and makes it clear not to come between him and his dad again because he will lose. He then goes and buys some shitbox and his dad looks like he's on the verge of tears because now they can fix up a car together (it was a nice gesture, but if Archie had kept the car he'd been given for free, he then could've used the money he spent on the shitbox to help out his dad with their financial problems. Or don't they have those anymore?). 

Meanwhile, a sandbag nearly kills Cheryl when she's onstage, Jughead's been relegated to filming behind the scenes of the musical (maybe Cole Sprouse can't sing and this was the writers' way of explaining why Jughead wasn't joining everyone else in song? I'm not sure), so he and Betty make it their mission to discover who is behind wanting Cheryl to be replaced. One threatening serial killer-esque note later and they're interrogating the other performers. Ethel claims that although she's not happy about being passed over in favour of Cheryl, she'd never hurt anyone (though later Jughead finds what was used to make the threatening note in a bin in her dressing room before she kicks him out). While this is happening, Cheryl's getting a confidence boost from Toni after her mum said she wouldn't give her permission to be in the musical (students need permission from their parents to perform a musical??) and I was amused that Toni didn't seem fazed by Cheryl admitting to having burned down her old creepy gothic house and cutting off her mum's oxygen after she'd gone to hospital following the fire. I guess Toni knows just how crazypants Cheryl is...and she accepts her that way. This is why she's a much better friend than Josie ever was. The best part of the entire episode, though, was Cheryl not letting having been replaced as Carrie in the play stop her from wearing Carrie's pink prom dress, covering herself in blood (probably pig's...though I wouldn't have minded if it was Chic's), and saying she wanted emancipation/to live with just her creepy grandma while telling her mum in no uncertain terms that both she and her dead husband's twin should eff off (in her classic Cheryl way). I love the fact that a candelabra is Cheryl's 'thing' (like, if she had an action figure, it'd come with a candelabra as an accessory), since she already used one to burn down her gothic house at the end of last season.

  

Compared to that^ scene, nothing after it was quite as interesting. Jugdad brushes off going to see the play, but then ends up going to show his support for Alice...only to see she's accepted her jerky husband back into her life. Chuck, formerly a jerk, had been trying to reform his ways, and while he saw the irony of trying to do that while playing the part of one of the badguys in the musical, he said someone had to be the villain. Eventually, Veronica (speaking not only for herself, but apparently Archie and Betty too) says that he's no longer a pariah, so I guess they've forgiven him for the crappy way he treated girls (including Veronica). While the actor who plays Chuck didn't get to sing much, from what I heard of his singing, he was fairly good. Someone else who didn't get to sing much was Midge, who takes over the role of Carrie when Kevin decides it's not worth the risk to keep Cheryl in the role when there's been numerous threats made. There's one moment when she's with a Serpent named Fangs (because of course that's his name), which'll prove important in the next couple episodes, but then when the play is being performed, it comes to an abrupt end as Midge is revealed to be dead, with a knife in her, hung up with a message from the Black Hood. Alice screams, everyone flees, Jughead is solely focused on getting to Betty (aw) and Chic...just remains seated, being his usual creepy self and looking even more guilty than he already did when he showed up earlier backstage (I also thought it odd that we saw the sheriff wandering through where the cast were getting changed, since they're students). I find it funny how some people seem to have this aversion to musicals and go overboard with their hatred towards them, downvoting the episode on IMDB, etc. They're not the plague, people! I thought this one was decent. Not up there with the best musical episodes from shows that I've seen, but not among the worst either.

Amusingly, Cheryl and her fellow cheerleaders are wearing special cheerleader mourning uniforms (complete with black pompoms) while standing in formation at Midge’s funeral, with Cheryl singing (she may not have gotten to do so in Carrie: The Musical, after being replaced, but she was most certainly going to sing at this funeral, damn it!) and vowing that she and her cheerleaders will get whoever's responsible - it was one of the BEST openings to an episode yet. When something matters to Cheryl, she certainly doesn't go about things half-arsed. She's all-in. She also basically tells everyone that Sheriff Clueless sucks at his job (which, to be fair...he kind of does). I did feel slight sympathy for him when Midge's mum slapped him, though. Cheryl then proceeds to tell him off (more than she already had), but Archie isn't getting in on the blame game, he just wants to help the sheriff, since he's convinced that they didn't stop the real Black Hood. I was amused by a line from Cheryl later on when Veronica's mum complimented her speech at the funeral.



Meanwhile, Nick St. Clair has apparently recovered from his two broken legs (though he reckons he'll forever have a limp) and kidnaps Archie (or he has his goons do it. They're wearing black hoods with no cut out holes for eyes...so I'm not sure how they see anything. Plus, they're wearing hoodies - I guess so they're not to be confused with THE Black Hood). Veronica's eating with her parents, amusingly calls them "Boris and Natasha" as she goes to answer a call, and it ends up being Nick who's threatening to kill Archie if he doesn't get a "cool mill" from Veronica's family. When she tells them, her parents act like they're going to take care of it, but when it's just the two of them, Veronica's dad says to her mum that he won't pay because A) Archie's 'not blood' (real nice! If you two had actually shaken hands after cutting your palms, then maybe this wouldn't have been an issue) and B) It'd send a message to Nick and his parents that they're 'weak' by giving into demands and then they'd come after Veronica. 

Realising it's up to her to save her b/f, Veronica cracks the uncrackable code of her parents' safe (it's 'always' her birthday, according to her. Really, Lodges? You don't choose something your daughter wouldn't know, yet you expect her not to break into it?), brings it to Nick St. Sicko (as Veronica calls him), he knows it's not enough and says the only other payment he'll accept to make up the difference is Veronica screwing him. Eventually she agrees, Nick sets up a screen on which Archie can watch their sexploits (poor Archie...even his hair looks sad), Veronica manages to convince Nick he's going to get what he wants, while Archie manages to free himself, then run like Forrest Gump, before kicking in the door to the hotel room and finding that Veronica has saved herself, having given Nick a taste of his own medicine, drugging him into unconsciousness, then holding him for ransom that she gets from his parents (she also demands a "cool mill") and showing it off to her parents. She was pretty awesome this episode (which was good to see, after she'd been previously humiliated and hated on by basically everyone in prior episodes). Less awesome? Archie not getting a clue after Veronica's dad even admits to not paying the ransom to get him back. All he apparently wants is to prove himself (what a dolt) to Veronica's dad and get the Black Hood (for reals this time).

Bughead go to the loony bin, Betty threatens to out their gay conversion tactics and bring the cops if the nasty nun there who tortured Cheryl doesn't give them the info they want. She gives them a photo of the guy she says was the real Charles (ie. Betty's bro), they go to the place where Betty first found Chic and ask a neighbour questions (she says there was a 'nice one' who carried her groceries and a bad one, who she saw taking out bloody sheets), then when Betty tells her mum about all this, Chic grabs a knife (I was confused by whose blood we saw go flying, as at first I thought he'd slashed Alice, but then later she doesn't act like she's injured. One thing I was clear on, though, was that Betty kicks Chic's arse and knocks him out, which was a cheer-worthy moment. When he awakes, he's tied to a chair in the basement, the truth comes out (his excuse is he never said he was Charles, he said he was Chic - like he thinks he's going to get off on a technicality), Alice drops bombshell after bombshell on Jugdad (she had his kid, gave it up for adoption, when that kid resurfaced and came to her door, she turned him away and now he's dead/Chic took his place), Jugdad catches Jughead beating the crap out of Chic, hauls him away, says it's none of their business, Betty frees Chic while her mum's talking to her dad, has been getting calls again from the Black Hood, leads Chic out into the woods, Black Hood appears, Betty says she's giving Chic a head start (updating him on the dwindling percentage of likelihood him getting away is), Chic runs, Black Hood gives chase, Betty returns home and asks her mum where her dad is - which strongly suggests to Betty that he's the Black Hood. The best part, though? Her 'Lollipop' ringtone (which Chic describes as a 'weird ringtone') is back! While it should annoy me, I just find it hilarious that such a comically cheery/upbeat tune plays and it's always during a serious scene/moment. 

I enjoyed the fact that this episode explored a dynamic we don't see much of - Betty and Cheryl (honestly, all I remember of their interaction from Season 1 was that Cheryl was always horrible to Betty about her weight). Anyway, Betty's freaking out and thinking that maybe she got Chic killed since she delivered him to the Black Hood...who she now believes is her dad. I kind of love the fact that Cheryl keeps calling Betty 'cousin' and drops words such as 'hence fore' into casual conversation. She has a Shakespeare-esque way of speaking at times, and I really like that about her. She spoke so quietly and seemed genuine in what she was telling Betty about dealing with all this (she was probably just grateful to be getting a break from her own family drama). I want to see more of these two interacting, as they make a good team.



Meanwhile, that Serpent that was the last one to talk to Midge before she died (Fangs) is in trouble, as he's a suspect. Veronica's dad wants Archie to reassemble his 'Dark Circle' (I was surprised people didn't think the creepy girl out of The Ring was coming after them, since the symbol Archie keeps putting everywhere looks basically like the ring symbol from that movie), New Reggie wants to be in charge of the 'Dark Circle' (it's funny how, as soon as he's put in charge of them, he uses the name he's wanted them to have from all the way back when Archie first started his Shirtless Army 'Red Circle' and rejected New Reggie's suggestion. He calls them the 'War Dogs'...because that sounds so much better than the 'Dark Circle'?), Veronica's dad has given New Reggie encouragement, while Archie doesn't want to have anything to do with them anymore and says as much when Jughead calls him to say that Archie's crew are attacking his guys. The former mayor acts as lawyer to Fangs, they escort him away trying to protect him, but Archie notices New Reggie's got a gun and is going after Fangs in the crowd, he tries to stop him...but Fangs winds up shot anyway. Whether Archie and New Reggie shot him by accident or there was another shooter somewhere nearby, I'm not sure. 

Veronica's storyline is pretty boring this episode, though probably fun for her since she gets to live in her very own version of The Matchelorette, with five suitors lined up to court her. After some interviews, she picks one but wants to do his business plan to start a casino her way (ie. legally). I wasn't really paying attention to this storyline, as it was kind of Dullsville. More interesting was Betty finding her Nancy Drew Secret-Code Activity Book at the place her dad was staying when he got kicked out of the house, she presents it to him, basically accuses him of being the Black Hood, but he claims he got it for her as a birthday present since she was always borrowing it out from the library. Later, Betty makes an arrangement with her dad over the phone to meet him, but the way she's talking to him and the way he's responding somewhat creepily, it's like they're both acknowledging he is in fact the Black Hood. She waits for him where she says it all started - at the town hall (where she delivered that speech which the Black Hood cited as the reason he started doing all this killing of 'sinners' in the first place). However, that's not where the Black Hood turns up. Instead, when Cheryl goes to answer her door in an annoyed fashion (because she thinks it's one of her mum's 'gentlemen callers'), she's confronted by the Black Hood and proceeds to give a classic horror movie scream that would make any Scream Queen proud (if I didn't already know that Cheryl doesn't die, I'd be a bit worried here, as she's become my favourite in the show - and favourite characters of mine tend to not fare so well a lot of the time). 

We pick up right where the previous episode ended, with Cheryl screaming her head off as the Black Hood goes full-on axe murderer. After she's fled upstairs, she's screaming and hiding, but I should've known better than to think that would be all she did. Cheryl Blossom saves her own damn self, getting out the window and downstairs, surprising the Black Hood with an arrow to the shoulder (archery practice paid off!) while looking like the Red Arrow from the TV series Arrow (actually, I think I'd prefer Cheryl as the Red Arrow than any other. She's quippy and uses 'whilst' - a word I too am fond of and have been known to use on more than one occasion - in a sentence...plus, she looks great). I enjoyed that they went full-on comic book-y here. I saw complaints about her not having enough time to get changed, but if she grabbed her gear from her room, dived out the window and immediately started changing while the Black Hood ran downstairs and outside...I think she had enough time. I loved the fact she said she was going to track the Black Hood and advised Betty that since he was wounded, he would now be 'acting on instinct, ready to lash out and kill anyone in his path, including his loved ones' - she sounded like a proper hunter/vigilante and I'm ALL FOR IT. This was easily my favourite moment from the episode...and this episode packed in a LOT of stuff.



There was SO MUCH going on, I wasn't even able to register it all as it happened. For example, there were many phone calls made between various characters throughout the episode. One such instance was Cheryl calling Betty to let her know she'd injured the Black Hood. I was hoping Betty would immediately punch her dad in the shoulder as soon as she saw him to see if he bled and that would've quickly answered the question about whether or not he was the Black Hood. The list of other phone calls made included Betty calling her mum (who says Betty's dad is out 'calming the riots' - HA! Yeah right), Veronica's dad getting a call from Replacement Smithers that he picked up Veronica, New Reggie calling Veronica's dad to ask for help since it was he who put him up to shooting Fangs (even though he didn't actually do it, it later turns out), but he abandons New Reggie, offering him no help (which kind of serves him right for trusting such a shady guy, but I still felt a bit sorry for New Reggie - a first, for me), Archie calls Jughead to inform him the Serpents are trashing the town - which Jughead is already well aware of, and he says it's because New Reggie shot Fangs, but Archie explains that New Reggie didn't shoot Fangs (nor did the two of them struggling over the gun accidentally cause Fangs to get shot, like what I thought had happened) and Archie wants Jughead to call off the Serpents as he, Kevin and Moose head to the school.

Meanwhile, Veronica spots Midge's mother wandering the streets in the middle of the riots, goes to her and she admits to being the one who shot Fangs, while Veronica's mother puts out a $1,000,000 bounty on the Black Hood and Betty's worried about her dad winding up dead as a result, since she's still positive he's the Black Hood. Cheryl calls her again, says she's tracked him and he is on his way...possibly to Betty's house. Naturally, Betty wants to find him before anyone else does (but doesn't bother filling her mum in on her suspicions about him). At the school, Serpents are destroying the place and it's up to Archie, Kevin and Moose to stop them. They arm up, but then Veronica calls Archie to let him know Midge's mum is the one who shot Fangs and has taken her to the new replacement sheriff (who's even more useless than Sheriff Clueless/Kevin's dad). After hanging up, Veronica discovers the reward her mum's offering for the Black Hood's head and this disgusts her (though I'm not sure why, considering all the people he's murdered. Veronica's parents have done lots of bad stuff...but wanting to put an end to the Black Hood menace? Not the worst thing...even if their reasons are self-serving). 

Serpents, led by Sweet Pea (I continue to wonder HOW he could possibly expect to be taken seriously and intimidate people with a name like that), are ready to attack Archie, Kevin and Moose, but Archie swears to him New Reggie didn't shoot Fangs, informing him what Veronica said - that it was Midge's mum. Sweet Pea doesn't care, though, he's just looking for any excuse to make Northsiders pay - as he thinks they're to blame for everything (of course). Archie, armed with his trusty baseball bat, along with Kevin and Moose, are all who stand in the way of Sweet Pea and his Serpent minions...that is until the principal arrives with a baseball bat of his own (plus backup) to put an end to this school destruction. He should've been like Principal Snyder in the Season 3 final of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and shouting about how he would have order/quiet and how all this going on was "simply unacceptable!". Alas, we don't get that from him. Still, his entrance was the most I've ever liked his character in this show. When Jughead finally meets up with Archie at the school, he informs him that the principal chased off the Serpents, Jughead's going to go attempt to calm them down, Archie gets a call from Pop, who lets him know New Reggie is hiding out at his retro diner, then Betty gets a call from Jugdad who's looking for his son and tells Betty her dad's at the hospital, wounded (I really wanted her to ask him "Is it a shoulder wound?", as that would've confirmed everything). 

Veronica's arguing with her mum at home about the bounty she put out for the Black Hood and thinks it's the money she got as ransom for holding Nick St. Clair hostage that's being used (which is Veronica's money, damn it! She extorted it fair and square!). She goes into her dad's study, locking out her mum, then discovers a file that says 'October Surprise' with photos of her mum and Archie's dad canoodling and a typed up letter exposing their affair. She confronts her mum about it, asking why she'd want something that could damage her chances at being mayor, but she reckons Veronica's dad said she'd be able to survive that scandal whereas Archie's dad (whose campaign is all about 'family values') would not. Veronica tells her mum that her dad keeps putting others - including her - in harm's way for his own gain, letting everyone else take the risk (and she'll soon be proven very right). But before that, Archie, Kevin and Moose go to Pop's diner to help New Reggie, but then that rival biker gang to the Serpents called the Ghoulies (that name never gets any less stupid no matter how many times you hear it) show up and start attacking the place. With Pop's help, Archie makes some Molotov cocktails which he hurls a safe distance away from the Ghoulies as just 'warning shots', I guess. They're obviously not intimidated by one high schooler with a couple of flaming bottles, but when the ex-sheriff, Jugdad and Archie's dad all show up...then they run? Really? It's three dudes. You still outnumber them...but whatever, Ghoulies (more like Pussies - not to be confused with the Pussycats. Speaking of, Josie is absent from this episode and it's all the better for it). 

As for how the parent trio knew the right place to be at the right time, apparently Jughead called his dad who then called Archie's dad. While I'm sure those who are into students lusting after adults were really into Kevin remarking "Hot Riverdale dads to the rescue." before pulling out his phone and taking a snap, I myself thought it pretty weird considering one of those was his own dad, while the other two were the dads of his friends. Sweet Pea is pissed at Jughead because of that drag-race he took part in which was what got the Ghoulies supremely pissed off in the first place (though wasn't it more because Archie got them arrested by the police who were waiting for them? I remember Jughead getting angry at Archie about it, saying they'd retaliate...and he was right). Veronica's dad gets a call from Pop who says that Kevin's dad, Jughead's dad and Archie's dad are being hailed as heroes - which most displeases Veronica's dad. Pop then gets a visit from a big burly guy who is looking for Veronica's dad and asks for his address. Considering the way he was towering over Pop, menacing him, I thought Pop was a goner for sure. 

Betty gets to the hospital, discovers the doctor who was seeing to her dad's wound is dead (apparently because he was asking too many questions), she then gets a call from the Black Hood who says to come home - which kind of removes all doubt (not there was any really left at this point) that the Black Hood is her dad. Anyway, the phone calls aren't over yet! Jughead gets one from Penny Peabody who is after a little revenge for what he did to her, so she's kidnapped his g/f...no, not Betty, Toni (which is really odd, since although they had a snog, they haven't really done anything since to make Penny think he thought of Toni in any sort of romantic way. I guess Betty just wasn't available for kidnapping since she's too busy running all over town looking for her dad/Black Hood). She says she's going to cut out Toni's tongue unless Jughead meets with her. 

While all that's^ going on, Betty gets home, her dad's putting on an oddly-timed home movie night complete with projector (Alice still isn't getting what's going on, but I was amused when she thought they were watching a snuff film). It's of Betty's dad as a kid, with his creepy mum offscreen calling him 'Harold' and saying his dad did an honourable thing by massacring that family - the Conways (so, it's revealed that Betty's dad's dad was the Riverdale Reaper) - but she needs him to convince another kid (who'd grow up to become the creepy janitor) that he should accuse someone else of the murders. Betty's dad informs her that despite previously telling her 'Great-Grandpappy Cooper' was killed by 'Great-Grandpappy Blossom'...it was in fact the other way around, he then took the Cooper name and a new identity, but the Conways found out, blackmailed him and that's why he offed them. Betty's dad then goes on about having a 'darkness' inside him that runs through their family, saying Betty's got it too, blah blah blah - it's all very typical monologuing villain stuff. Things finally get interesting when Alice distracts him by first pointing out that if he's going to go after 'sinners' such as Archie's dad (for being an 'adulterer'), then he should really off himself too since he's also one. She then points out that she herself is one, he starts strangling her and eventually Betty hits him over the back of the head with the shovel from the fireplace. It's Alice, however, who gives him a good beating and it was certainly a long time coming. I'd been spoiled for Betty's dad turning out to be the Black Hood, but hadn't known the 'why'. Must say...it seemed very convoluted and wasn't satisfying at all - though him getting repeatedly beaten on the head by Alice was.

Even more satisfying, though, was the scene where Jughead turns up to free Toni, Penny reveals she's not alone and has the leader of the Ghoulies as backup, but Jughead's not as dumb as he looks/as his name suggests, since he's brought backup too...in the form of Cheryl! It was an awesome moment (just like her taking on the Black Hood earlier was). She frees Toni and they leave after Penny makes one final offer to Jughead - she wants the Southside (so she can sell drugs, which is why she teamed up with the Ghoulies) and the Serpents to leave Riverdale or it's going to be a showdown between them and the Ghoulies. 



Jughead brings Penny's deal to the Serpents, they're not down with leaving, Sweet Pea wants to fight, Jughead points out it'd be a suicide mission, Jugdad turns up and says he got a call saying Fangs is dead, this is all the Serpents need to outvote Jughead on going to war with the Ghoulies (the way they vote, with their arms raised and bending two fingers to look like snake fangs is kind of ridiculous...but it's funny seeing Cheryl also cast her vote, though thankfully she doesn't do the stupid snake fang hand gesture). Jughead argues with his dad in their trailer about the whole going to war thing, but when he's left alone he regards his wall on which he's been piecing together everything that's happened, then comes to a realisation, calls Veronica's dad, states that he's been buying up everywhere in town but couldn't buy the Serpents' bar, so he paid Penny and the Ghoulies to go to war with them to get rid of them, then he wonders how much this is costing him and says he has a counter offer. 

What's Archie been doing? Asked no one ever. He's at home with his dad, doing his keeping vigil thing with his trusty baseball bat like he's been doing every night since his dad first got shot apparently...not that it does much good, since the Black Hood - or rather a second Black Hood, since Betty's dad is currently unconscious on account of Betty's mum walloping him good - has come to finish off Archie's dad, but Archie puts up a fight, only to be saved by the person he was supposedly sitting up all night to protect - his dad. Stupidly, after whacking Black Hood #2, he turns his back on the guy with a gun and consequently gets shot again for his foolish mistake. Luckily, this time around he was wearing a bulletproof vest thanks to Kevin's dad making him wear one earlier on (so ex-Sheriff Clueless isn't entirely clueless after all). After Archie's checked his dad's okay, he runs off after Black Hood #2 against his dad's protestations. 

Elsewhere, the big burly guy who was after Veronica's dad has arrived at the Lodge residence (thanks, Pop!), he's confronted by Replacement Smithers (who he makes short work of), then comes after Veronica and her mum. They retreat to the study, Hermione grabs a gun and wastes no time in shooting the bastard (who'd come looking for revenge against the Lodges because Veronica's dad had his dad offed because he was one of the ones Archie had overheard plotting against Veronica's dad the poker game that one time...I think). Later, when Veronica's dad shows up (and sees dead Replacement Smithers who'll now need replacing himself), both Veronica and her mum are completely over/done with him. They tell him to clean up his own mess. Someone else cleaning up messes is Jughead, who has gone to meet Penny and the Ghoulies by himself. Because there hadn't been enough phone calls being made in this episode already, while Betty and Archie watch her dad being taken away in cuffs (I think at this point they've both figured out that Betty's dad couldn't have been the Black Hood who just tried to kill Archie's dad), Jughead calls and tells Betty he loves her before hanging up, she frets, then Jugdad calls her and asks where Jughead's at.

The answer is...he's currently making a deal with Penny that if he hands himself over, there will be no war between the Serpents and Ghoulies. She agrees, but of course you can't trust a former Serpent whose arm tattoo you cut off (so apparently Jughead is as dumb as he looks/as his name suggests after all, for trusting her), as she's not honouring that deal, the Ghoulie leader says they're going to do scary things to Betty, then all of them proceed to beat the crap out of Jughead before Penny gets her pound of flesh in revenge for him cutting off her Serpent tattoo. The episode ends with most of the characters arriving after Penny and the Ghoulies have hightailed it out of there, then Jugdad emerges carrying his son in his arms who is looking mostly dead (but not 'dead dead', because this show would never actually kill off Jughead). This was certainly an action-packed episode, it flew by and there was nary a 'slow' moment. It's like the show decided to throw in everything plus the kitchen sink. I also think I haven't seen as many phone calls made in a single episode of show ever before this one (and that includes the series 24). It's amazing not one person got an engaged signal or "Leave a a message after the beep" when trying to get through. This was probably one of the best, if not THE best episode of the season....but it wasn't quite over yet.

It seems this show's following the pattern of Game of Thrones in that its second-last episode of each season is where the BIG stuff happens, then the actual season final is about dealing with all of the fallout from the previous episode and sort of winding down a bit before something happens to 'hook' viewers into watching the next season. Consequently, I wasn't as fussed on this episode as I was with the last one, since that one was balls-to-the-wall crazy...but this one? Not so much. Although the episode starts with Betty, Archie and Veronica at Jughead's gravestone, clutching his beanie, I think only the most fangirly fangirls of Jughead would've actually believed he was dead (and were most likely losing their shit over it). Sure enough, he awakes in hospital - seemingly not on death's door like he appeared at the end of the previous episode.

Evidently, some time has passed, Jugdad informs his son that he and the Serpents went to war with the Ghoulies after all and lost, then Jughead learns that Fangs is still alive and his dad lied about him being dead to get the Serpents riled up/ready for war. Although the trailer park burned, miraculously their own trailer still stands. Jugdad basically informs him that the Serpents are no more. Betty visits, Jughead's now aware her dad's the Black Hood, she says she never wants to see him again, she contacts Varchie to let them know Jughead's awake and he wastes no time with his theorising once he learns there's a second Black Hood (since Betty and Archie came to the realisation that her dad couldn't have been the one who attacked Archie and his dad). He reckons the second Black Hood is the politically motivated one who attacked town hall and went after Archie's dad who was running for mayor.

There's other stuff going on as well, such as Southside students getting booted out of Riverdale High, but all the other students rally behind them, wearing Serpent jackets and Archie makes a big speech to the principal about not being down with discrimination - and this, amazingly, leads to the principal being convinced into letting them stay (I did like Toni telling Cheryl she looked good in that jacket, since she did indeed. Cheryl knows she did, too). While Jugdad's falling back into bad habits (getting drunk again, giving up, etc) after having been fired from Pop's (thanks to Veronica's dad), Betty winds up going to see her father (after saying she wouldn't) in his Hannibal Lecter-esque prison cell, where he blah blahs about their 'darkness' but she tells him he holds no power over her, then walks away as he yells after her. Her mum's not doing so great, as there's people outside their home harassing her since her husband was the Black Hood. Polly's come home and towards the end of the episode says she knows someone who can help her mum...but she's got that creepy vibe going that lets you know she's been brainwashed/converted by that cult she's with. No good can come of this. Still, there is some fun to be had - mostly involving Cheryl, of course.

Her first appearance in the episode involves her finalising her emancipation from her horrid mum, she wants to personally deliver the letter of separation to her, taking it out to the barn (apparently when she told her mum on the night of Carrie: The Musical being performed that she and Uncle Claudius were 'pig-people and should live amongst the pigs'...she wasn't being metaphorical/using a figure of speech, she meant it literally), but sees/overhears her mum and uncle conspiring with Veronica's dad, causing her to gasp, which alerts her mum to someone being outside, but when she checks, there's no one there (because Cheryl's hiding in a barrel). She lets Veronica know about this, and I'm hoping for more scenes between these two next season (just like I want more scenes with Cheryl and Betty...or basically Cheryl and any character. She makes them all more interesting).

She's kind of the 'hero' of this episode in a lot ways, as she not only informs Veronica of what her dad is up to, but also informs the Serpents (who do in fact still exist - Jughead's dad was lying about them being no more) that there's going to be a raid of the Serpents' bar and there'll likely be casualties. I was amused that when Cheryl learned of this, she was in the process of packing food into a wicker basket looking totally like Red Riding Hood off to visit her grandma. 



After Cheryl's warning, they manage to sneak away and seek shelter at Archie's place, since his dad offered. Towards the end of the episode, Jugdad retires from being King of the Serpents (for really reals this time) and Jughead takes his place. His first act as the new King of the Serpents is to welcome Cheryl into the gang since she was instrumental in them making it to safety. Clearly they're aware that red is Cheryl's colour, as they've had a jacket specially made for her. It was so good to see Cheryl happy and accepted into a family who'll treat her as she should be (unlike her own mum). It's a far cry from where she was at emotionally in last season's final. Back then, she was ready to kill herself. Whereas now she appears like she couldn't be happier. Good for Cheryl! She deserved it (yet there were people complaining about her getting the jacket, thinking it was for Jughead now that he's leader. Seriously? Can you really see Jughead wearing a bright red jacket in a sea of black jackets? I don't think so. Others complained about Cheryl being let into the gang when Jughead had to go through various trials and Betty had to do an inappropriate pole dance...but I think Cheryl proved herself by helping them all out numerous times. Screw anyone who says any different!).






Other not-so-interesting stuff going on - Archie has managed to figure out that the one behind the second Black Hood's attack on his dad, town hall, etc was Veronica's dad. Earlier it had been revealed Black Hood #2 had died in a firefight with the cops and it turned out to be Tall Boy (who was kicked out of the Serpents earlier in the season). I was surprised by how anticlimactic the reveal of Black Hood #2 was. I was expecting more. Quite disappointing, really. Anyway, Archie knows Veronica's dad was responsible for all of that, he swears he's going to prove everything and then uses the same speech from his Shirtless Army 'Red Circle' video in an attempt to intimidate Veronica's dad. Meanwhile, Veronica's given up everything to buy back Pop's from her dad, he's cutting her off, but she accepts that without hesitation (I think Veronica deserves props for that). I was mildly amused by her dad's Legion of Doom he had apparently formed (including Cheryl's mum and uncle, Penny Peabody, the Ghoulies' leader and the replacement sheriff). They're hanging out at what was formerly the Serpents' bar, while the core four are at Pop's and Veronica has plans for the basement of the retro diner which, according to Pop, used to be a secret speakeasy back in the days of 'flapper dresses and cigarette girls'. Veronica wants to reopen it and make it a 'cabaret space for world-class entertainment and the most decadent cocktails. A place for North and Southsiders alike', hoping to enlist Jugdad to manage it so Serpents feel welcome. 

Archie's dad sadly loses to Hermione in regards to becoming mayor (it's probably just as well he didn't win, otherwise he could've likely looked forward to getting shot at some more), but she comes over to tell him he ran a good campaign and the race was very close. They shake hands. The episode's final scene involves everyone at the school gymnasium, Josie's singing the national anthem and you're totally expecting something bad is going to happen. While no one gets shot, Archie gets arrested and is accused of killing that store clerk who, along with his masked buddies, was robbing the Lodge Lodge and then got offed by Replacement Smithers in an earlier episode this season. I guess Archie shouldn't have brought up that guy during his big speech to Veronica's dad earlier. It probably gave him the idea for this. Anyway, the episode ends with this as its 'cliffhanger'. It's not really that exciting.

Final thoughts on this second season as a whole:

While it was definitely a step down in quality from Season 1, there was also good stuff sprinkled throughout that kept it from being 'terrible' - at least for me, anyway. I liked seeing some characters interact more than what we'd seen previously and the different dynamics, the show delved into its characters, taking them in new directions and giving them further development. While Archie's still not a favourite character of mine, K.J. Apa definitely improved this season. Lili Reinhart also had a lot of emotions to convey this season and I liked that the show explored Betty's 'darkness' more (the only downside was the whole Chic storyline which really dragged and didn't seem to go anywhere). Veronica seems to be the character who's most torn between two worlds. While the first season showed her trying to shed her 'bad girl' image, we saw this season that she is willing to get involved in some pretty shady stuff. However, when it mattered, she was usually there for her friends. Hopefully with what she said she had planned in this last episode of the season, it means she'll have been forgiven for the part she played in her family's shady business. As for Jughead...well...I can't say I'm overly fond of him, and I'm still sick of him always voiceovering every episode, but he's alright. I got kind of bored with his Serpent storyline this season, though. At least he proved himself worthy of being their leader in the end.

Cheryl - what can I say? A character who when I started watching the show, I wasn't too sure about, has now become my favourite. She continues to get the best lines, she's the most entertaining character in the show, she's been through so much, I enjoy her dynamics with each and every other character and she just brings so much to the series. Madelaine Petsch is a gem and, for me, she was the stand-out this season. Josie...I'm still not fussed on. She's not particularly interesting (even when she's given more focus), she seems to turn on people easily, her bitchiness isn't entertaining like Cheryl's is, and I would still trade her screentime for getting more screentime with the other two Pussycats. Toni was a character who I didn't like at first, but gradually she became more tolerable, and now that she's involved with Cheryl, I'm liking her character more. Kevin annoyed me this season, as did New Reggie, but they were both 'okay', I guess. The other recurring school characters, though, I wasn't really interested in (except Moose, who I want to see telling someone to "stay out of Riverdale", damn it!). Regarding the parents - I don't mind Archie's dad, I like Alice more now than I did in the first season (though at times she can still annoy me), Jugdad is pretty good, Veronica's mum....I'm still not sure I have a handle on. She seemed a lot 'colder' towards her daughter at the start of this season, but that may have been because of Veronica's dad turning up. I'm hoping she won't get dragged back into working alongside him. He's got his Legion of Doom now, so he probably doesn't need her. Veronica's dad is a real piece of work, but he's at interesting at least some of the time.