Ok, so what's so offensive about effeminate gays?

I like effeminate gays, it's butch lesbians I'm not crazy about

Ick.
So, you're not here to make friends, after all.  Good job.

I believe this discrimination occurs because sexism is structural, and homophobia, structural itself, is in good part a byproduct of sexism, in great part a byproduct of other structural types of discrimination. Therefore, even though they are discriminated against, gay people are not exempt from displaying sexist attitudes as well. Also, there are “effeminate” or “feminine” men and “masculine” women who are not homosexual, which means there is no fundamental overlap between homosexuality and the transgender spectrum of identity. Even people who are traditionally held to behave like the opposed sex, however, are not necessarily transgender either, since their perception of what counts as being a man or woman is not necessarily on par with the traditional values of their culture. I am myself a male which identifies more strongly with behaviors generally thought to be feminine. I’m an asexual or at the very least demisexual heteroromantic, which means, among other things, that I’m definitely not homosexual. Whether I would identify as transgender if I thought I was able to successfully transition and be satisfied with my self-image is more arguable; I would probably rather have been born as a woman, despite their lack of privilege, but, at the moment, I do not identify as one and, therefore, at least for the moment, I’m not transgender, even though I share some of their feelings, and I certainly do not suffer for the moment the same degree of discrimination that TG people do, nor even something close to it. Either way, although all of this is true, “traditional” society does not care about the specificities. Throughout all my life, from public to military school, I was always called a faggot, and I was beaten and abused and raped and ostracized. Either way, despite what traditional society thinks, all of these people, just as everyone else here, deserve the same amount of respect and freedom that everyone does, and I’m very vocal about the need to fight all discrimination regarding sex, gender identity, gender roles and sexual orientation.

Danny Huston looks like a delicious hunk of man flesh

Thank you! I feel the same about you.

You misunderstand me. My response was extensive because of respect, not desperation. Undeserved respect, apparently. After reading your and gameboy’s stupid, transphobic and, even at the most basic human level, incredibly offensive comments, my first reaction was to respond in kind (though without the homophobia, of course, since I have principles to stand for). I did restrain that impulse, however, for, after all, we are in a LGBT board, which is meant to be a place of understanding. I could just have offended you back, which I would be completely entitled to, or, as I am about to do, give you the direct reprobation someone has to. Of course I have already had discriminatory thoughts and I will probably have other discriminatory thoughts in the future, but when people call me on them, I do change. If I had not changed, having being born in conservative household, would despise you to this very day just for being gay. I would probably despise myself as well for not feeling ok with the body I was born into, but, like you have just evidenced so conveniently well, the two are not the same thing. I did change, though, and *gasp* I still have, occasionally, discriminatory thoughts, even though I try to fight them in the best way I can.

Apparently you are not willing to change, however. You can keep pretending we are both the same for all I care, but that is nothing but an self-excuse for you to keep discriminating TG people. I do not approve of it, and I’m here to raise my voice for people who are of the same mind. Actually, what you are willing to do is to take pride in your discriminatory thoughts and defend them with a holier than thou attitude. Yes, for, if anyone here is holier than thou, that’s you and only you. For equating having, but striving to change discriminatory thoughts and being perfect/not having them at all, you are also the true hypocrite here. At the risk of sounding redundant, I’m not perfect, nor did I ask you to be. Actually, I did not ask you to be like me. I already stopped having the kind of attitude you have years ago, and now I actively participate in social movements that fight for the civil and medical rights of trans people. Yet I’m not perfect for that either, nor did I really ask you to go that far. I asked something very simple, for you to stop making derogatory claims about TG people here. You are so holier than thou about your transphobia, though, that, even without me calling you a transphobe before (which, hell, you are) or even saying that you are a bigot yourself (which, apparently, you are), only the fact of me criticizing your comments was enough to incite all this nonsensical, perhaps desperate (or so the Caps Lock suggests) cheap excuse of a justification, all covered by your hypocritical assumptions that you were being asked to be perfect and that all other people are all just as resistant to change their stupid traits as you are. Before coming back to your rosy view of our “hypocritical, corrupt society” which does not change and make your bigotry a natural phenomenon, however, do bear in mind that the only people who actually think society is so corrupt and hypocritical that it is not able to be changed are either people who have reached complete disappointment or people who, like you, actually contribute to make it as corrupt and hypocritical as it is. I don’t cover nor justify my discrimination, however, so I don't need to cling to such convenient attitudes. The world is neither black nor white, and that is what make change possible.

Of course TG is not a sexuality spectrum, nobody said it was. It is an identity spectrum. You blaming them for popular misunderstandings about it is no different different, however, from me blaming you for causing misunderstanding about them just because you are gay. And yes, I can and do expect society to turn a new leaf for them, just as I can and do expect society to turn a new leaf for you, even though you apparently don’t think others should have the same privileges you have or those you don’t have, but want to. And, of course, following your logic, I could also call homosexuality a mental disorder. Also following your logic, I could disregard the whole LGBT movement, because, you know, there are children starving in Africa, so who cares? Men should only date women and think of those poor, starving children if they ponder otherwise. I’m not going to take you seriously on this stupid suggestion. We should care about both, of course. Who do you take me for? And, do bear in mind, you can say what I can or cannot do as many times as you want, but that does not change one iota of what I can or cannot do. Technically, you can discriminate, but you are not going to do so without being criticized for it. For my part, I can have such simple expectations both from you and from the rest of society, I will continue having them and I will continue pressuring you (and society, mostly society, since it matters more than you) to change. That’s how our imperfect world works, and you are going to have to deal with it or fatuously resist. And what’s that stupid reuse of my “whether they like it or not” saying to refer to cis people? Do you actually believe cis people are underprivileged, or that I should take pity on their discriminating acts because they did not choose to be born cis? Oh, poor you for being born cis and having to deal with the existence of trans people! It must be so difficult! Nature is so cruel! Seriously. Again, what do you take me for? I’m laughing at this suggestion right now, but I’m not going to say anything more about it, because I don’t even need to. Be assured that I take no pity on you for having being born cis, just as you take no pity on heterosexual people for having being born as such, and most likely do not simply disregard offensive comments about your sexuality when they are thrown at you on the basis that their authors were born different and are thus entitled (according to your defective logic) to discriminate you openly and without reprimand.

As for the medical standing of dysphoria, it’s not up for you to decide where to draw the line on these matters, and dysphoria is not even the defining trait of being TG. It’s only a consequence that happens in some, but not all cases, and which is responsible for part of their distress and also for our need to help them better live their lives as who they are according to their identity. Not like you even care about the medical and psychological specificities, anyway. You just want the convenience of disregarding their rights and political importance by calling them diseased, the same cheap trick that was used to control homosexual people throughout history. Being a pre-med student myself, and having started college life with psychology in mind, this mean-spirited misuse of science makes me even more mad. And what of this stupid nonsense about TG identity being just a call for attention? One could argue that gender identity is even more basic about who one is than one’s sexuality. And, following your defective logic, I could also say that your sexuality is a meaningless plea for attention, or that your whole life is a meaningless plea for attention, and that whether you are unhappy about anything, you should think about those poor starving children in Africa. Please, I’m not going to read this transphobic right-wing conspirational stupidity and let you have your way. And do bear in mind that, by suggesting TG people are closeted homosexuals, you are actually contributing to the misunderstanding yourself, which means you are not only a transphobe, but also an inane self-damaging idiot. If the discrimination you suffered as a gay man was not enough to give you any sympathy for other oppressed people, nor are you going to care one iota when you discriminate them and somebody informs you of that, then shame on you. I do not care at all for your cheap reasons for maintaining your own limited privilege and keeping other people beneath you. Every time you express your stupid, dangerous and repressive beliefs, I am going to call you on the fragility and harmfulness of your views. You can either live with that, face your own faults and change or go away if you are not happy about it  From now on I will be more concise and less considerate, but I can assure you I am not going to remain silent as you make this board a place for discriminating TG people.

You're very welcome!