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Post by Nalkarj on Apr 30, 2018 23:16:31 GMT
Y’ever noticed how difficult it is to write fiction about superhero characters? No? Well, just go along with it.
It’s difficult. I mean, think about it:
OK, OK, I rigged it by purposely writing awful prose. But I just think it would be hard to do, especially with all the superhero names—it sounds really clunky. I suppose one could replace the titles with actual names (“Well,” said Clark, “what do you…”), but do they all know each other’s names? Easier with Marvel because so few of them (at least in the movies) actually have secret identities?
I always have to stifle a chuckle whenever an actor, dead serious, has to call another actor a superhero-name. (I remarked on this in my Justice League “review,” i.e., collection of random thoughts.) It always takes me out of the thing.
But I guess that’s there are so few actual fiction books about superheroes and why they work better in comics in movies. OK, that’s completely pointless; it just came to mind. On to regularly scheduled business.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 30, 2018 23:18:54 GMT
Some names they avoid entirely... Like Scarlet Witchy Woman
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Post by Nalkarj on Apr 30, 2018 23:33:44 GMT
Some names they avoid entirely... Like Scarlet Witchy Woman “Haha!” said the evil Dr. Scratchandsniff, cackling to himself. “I have invented this ray-gun by which I will be able to take over 9/16 of the universe! Mwahahahaha!” “Not so fast!” The voice came from—from seemingly nowhere! [ Note: all bad writing has to include lots of exclamation points. It’s a rule, strictly enforced by the Bad-Writing Police.] Or… Scratchandsniff turned, terrified, and saw in the window—none other than Scarlet Witchy Woman! “Oh no!” cried Scratchandsniff, the expression on his face like Richard Nixon’s if he’d simultaneously smelt a skunk and heard that the House of Representatives was going to draw up impeachment charges. “It’s—it’s the Scarlet Witchy Woman! How—how could she have escaped?!” [ Note: all bad writing has to include dashes to indicate pauses. It’s not as strictly enforced as the exclamation point mandate, but it’s still strongly advised. Also, the exact same word should ideally be on either side of the dash.] The Scarlet Witchy Woman [ see? I can’t write that without giggling] used her magic bracelets [ ahem…ahem…] to beat off Scratchandsniff’s goons. Then she punched him in the face and, with her super-strength, sent the ray-gun jettisoning into the dark side of the planet Mercury. [ Note: bad writing also requires one uncommon or “big” word, usually used incorrectly and not as uncommon as the writer believes. If the writer is particularly lousy, he will also use one of the longest words in the English language, e.g., antidisestablishmentarianism or floccinaucinihilipilification . He will also try to be, er, “inventive” with punctuation and spelling.) “No worries,” said the Scarlet Witchy Woman [* Salzmank is chortling*], freeing Scratchandsniff’s captives. “Oh, Scarlet Witchy Woman, thank you so much for saving us…" OK, yadda yadda yadda. See what I mean?  |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 2:52:23 GMT
how ironic that all was ! [ Nalkarj ] Cooooo-doze to the author (and that does not mean that it put me to sleep!) ! |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 2:56:15 GMT
Speaking (or Rather READING/ writing ) of names,
it was just noticed that @forceghostackbar
has somehow lost a "T" and gained an "F"
Does not mean that the detective agency so lately started has been disbanded, does it ?
Say not so !
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Post by Deleted on May 1, 2018 3:07:36 GMT
Speaking (or Rather READING/ writing ) of names, it was just noticed that @forceghostackbar has somehow lost a "T" and gained an "F" Does not mean that the detective agency so lately started has been disbanded, does it ? Say not so ! De tective Ackbar will return... When a proper mystery presents itself! |
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Post by No Morpho, Only Bánh mì on May 1, 2018 3:09:23 GMT
Speaking (or Rather READING/ writing ) of names, it was just noticed that @forceghostackbar has somehow lost a "T" and gained an "F" Does not mean that the detective agency so lately started has been disbanded, does it ? Say not so ! De tective Ackbar will return... When a proper mystery presents itself! As long as Deflective Ackbar doesn’t ignore any intriguing mysteries. |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 3:12:56 GMT
No deflecting defective detective detected.
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Post by Nalkarj on May 1, 2018 3:19:36 GMT
Never! Never let it be said that the Great Ackbar-Salzmank Detective Agency shall go silent! We just don’t have any customers at the moment, that’s all. And we have yet to hire a gorgeous secretary (blonde, brunette, or redhead, I’m not picky) whom we can ogle while she goes about her secretarial duties. (“ Hello, Nurse!”) (In all seriousness, kids, as Ackbar knows, I’m working on a puzzle behind the scenes, but I’m a bit bogged down in real-life stuff at the moment.)
“No deflecting defective detective detected”—now that could be a line from a light comedy-musical! Masterly, Bat!  |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 3:28:15 GMT
I hear that this red-head is a great typist with script writing ability BUT Probably not what you had in mind OGLE-wise so will keep looking , Nalkarj ! and beware of quicksand and lightning, irl |
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Post by Nalkarj on May 1, 2018 3:33:56 GMT
SGT. AFORDI: No deflecting defective detective detected,
affront to my hunt that’s as yet been effected
For in my searching for who done this deed,
all we can say is, it can’t be the Swede!
[shock, awe, as everyone turns to Klas Thorwald, the Swedish director]
THORWALD: Not I? Never! I’d not watch him bleed!
AFORDI: But all of the rest of you could be the villains
and why should I leave out even the fill-ins?
CAST: They’re called understudies, Sarge.
AFORDI: Don’t forget I’m in charge!
Remember I’m sent here to well be respected,
no deflecting defective detective detected!
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 3:47:40 GMT
RE: ^^^^ THAT
Me and  |
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Post by Nalkarj on May 1, 2018 3:53:33 GMT
RE: ^^^^ THAT
Me and Thanks. Now I need to finish the play and get someone to set it to music. Like that’s ever gonna happen… |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 4:00:05 GMT
NalkarjBe sure to get the Sleuth singer as the lead. He would be GREAT as Sgt. Alford !
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Post by Nalkarj on May 1, 2018 4:01:55 GMT
Nalkarj Be sure to get the Sleuth singer as the lead. He would be GREAT as Sgt. Alford ! ! I’m hiring you—o’course, you came up with the main lyric and all... All of us can join in! |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 4:04:22 GMT
Seriously Pointless threads that are supposed to be pointless are such a refreshing change of 
Now back to our regularly scheduled silly pointlessness. |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 4:08:32 GMT
Gotta get back On Topic track with the SUPERHERO SAGA !
The detective story will have to wait ... rumor (rumour) has it that our potential lead actor is still among the missing !
HEY ... do we know any detectives who could locate him ?
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Post by Nalkarj on May 1, 2018 4:33:27 GMT
Y’know, everyone, we have the remarkable (and much-to-be-admired, in these ‘serious about everything’ days) habit to fill up pointless threads. It’s always fun. ’Tis a quandary indeed, Bat, that the lead actor/singer/STAR (in all caps for emphasis) has disappeared, without a trace! All I can remember is his voice, once bolding proclaiming Cole Porter songs, now merely a whisper on the wind… |
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Post by BATouttaheck on May 1, 2018 4:50:31 GMT
Maybe we could get Lassie, who btw was a HE and not a SHE, to find him if we had something to "scent" on before sending her looking.
After all, maybe Cole's singer has fallen into a well or experienced a mine cave-in while spelunking beteeen singing gigs. Call in the hound ! (or collie, as the case may be!)
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Post by Deleted on May 1, 2018 4:51:37 GMT
I've been recalled!
If you are in possession of any Defective Ackbars be sure to contact Customer Service immediately!
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