autumn
Junior Member
@autumn
Posts: 4,544
Likes: 3,635
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Post by autumn on Oct 27, 2020 0:22:05 GMT
Yes. Also by a family member. Well, I'm not hitting the 'like' button because there's nothing here to like. But I will say it is very comforting and extremely reassuring to know that I am not the only one with an unkind family member. I appreciate the sentiment. It's bad enough when it happens, but when it's done to you by someone who's supposed to be part of your trusted safety net, it's even that much worse. Worse yet, it's hard for some to understand who've never been through it.
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Post by dirtypillows on Oct 27, 2020 0:26:05 GMT
Well, I'm not hitting the 'like' button because there's nothing here to like. But I will say it is very comforting and extremely reassuring to know that I am not the only one with an unkind family member. I appreciate the sentiment. It's bad enough when it happens, but when it's done to you by someone who's supposed to be part of your trusted safety net, it's even that much worse. Worse yet, it's hard for some to understand who've never been through it. Yes, that is often the worse part about it and just compounds the paranoia. It almost feels like it's gotten to the point where I don't even want to bring it up to people because the idea of somebody dismissing is just too invalidating for me. At the same time, every person needs to be heard!
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autumn
Junior Member
@autumn
Posts: 4,544
Likes: 3,635
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Post by autumn on Oct 27, 2020 0:31:37 GMT
I appreciate the sentiment. It's bad enough when it happens, but when it's done to you by someone who's supposed to be part of your trusted safety net, it's even that much worse. Worse yet, it's hard for some to understand who've never been through it.Yes, that is often the worse part about it and just compounds the paranoia. It almost feels like it's gotten to the point where I don't even want to bring it up to people because the idea of somebody dismissing is just too invalidating for me. At the same time, every person needs to be heard! Agreed. There's a need to be heard and there's a need for validation. Yet most often the experience is dismissed which only makes us question ourselves and also empowers the person doing the gaslighting (secretly or even directly). Meanwhile we try to figure out what we did wrong as the cycle continues, which again gets worse without the validation of the experience we need so we can heal and move on. What really gets to me as well is how the people who do this to others rarely pay any type of "price" for what they inflict while we can carry burdens for years, decades.
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