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Post by Isapop on Aug 23, 2021 11:37:08 GMT
"So, Doctor No, we meet at last."
"Welcome to my lair, Mr. Bond. I've heard so much about you."
"Who is that lady with you, Dr. No?"
"Allow me to present my wife."
"Charmed. And what is her name?"
"Ida No."
"...This is your wife?"
"I just said she was."
"Good. What's her name?"
"Ida No."
"...You know your wife's name, don't you?"
"Certainly I know my wife's name!"
"OK, so tell me her name."
"I've been telling you her name!"
"Then what's her name?"
"Ida No!"
"You dunno your wife's name?"
"What kind of name is that?" I didn't say Yuda No, I said Ida No!"
"Musta been an arranged marriage. Got any kids?"
"We have one son."
"Great. What's your son's name?"
"Yul No."
"How?"
"How what?"
"How will I know his name?"
"Because I'm telling you."
"OK, then tell me your son's name."
"Yul No."
"I'll know?"
"Are you deaf? I didn't say Al No! I said Yul No! Al No's my brother!"
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Post by Catman on Aug 23, 2021 11:43:29 GMT
Catman assumes the movie would still feature Ursula Andress?
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Post by marianne48 on Aug 23, 2021 11:48:23 GMT
Good thing Pussy Galore wasn't in that one.
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Post by Isapop on Aug 23, 2021 11:59:52 GMT
Catman assumes the movie would still feature Ursula Andress? Undress?
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Post by mattgarth on Aug 23, 2021 13:03:27 GMT
"And is that Felix Leiter?"
"No, he's still too heavy."
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Post by Isapop on Aug 23, 2021 13:17:19 GMT
"And is that Felix Leiter?" "No, he's still too heavy." "I know he's heavy, but he's Leiter? "If he's lighter, he's not heavy." "Leiter wasn't heavy. Leiter's heavy now." "If lighter's heavy, then what's lighter now?" "He's Leiter." "You just said he's heavy."
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Post by mattgarth on Aug 23, 2021 13:22:09 GMT
"Where's Moneypenny?"
"Penny doesn't have the money."
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Post by Isapop on Aug 23, 2021 13:30:18 GMT
"Where's Moneypenny?" "Penny doesn't have the money." "I don't want Penny's money. I want Moneypenny!"
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Post by mattgarth on Aug 23, 2021 13:36:00 GMT
'M' and 007 consider the next case:
___________________________________
"It must be the plan of Goldfinger."
"Go figure what plan?"
"Goldfinger's plan."
"Go figure whose plan?"
"Goldfinger's plan."
"You want me to go figure Gold's plan?"
"Not Gold's plan -- Goldfinger's plan!"
"Gold has a finger plan?"
"James, you have a licence to kill -- that's why you possess a double O."
"I'm a W.O. -- like a Warrant Officer?"
"No -- you're a Double O."
"You mean I've got two O's?"
"That's right -- an 'O' followed by another 'O'."
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Post by Isapop on Aug 23, 2021 13:53:44 GMT
"Blofeld"
"That's a hundred bucks in advance. Where's Feld?"
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Post by mikef6 on Aug 23, 2021 16:14:06 GMT
If the first Bond movie had been written and directed by Abraham, Zucker, and Zucker
Leiter: I wonder who is spoiling all the Cape Canaveral rocket launches.
Bond: Let’s say it is SPECTRE
Together: It is SPECTRE
Bond: Now let’s say the interference is coming from Crab Key.
Together: The interference is coming from Crab Key.
Bond: I went out there with Quarrel but he didn’t come back.
Leiter: Buddy didn’t come back?
Bond: Buddy came back. Quarrel didn’t. And he got burned up.
Leiter: Andy got burned up?
Bond: Quarrel got burned up. Andy escaped. I don’t know how he did it.
Leiter: Then Howie did it?
Bond: Howie couldn’t have done it. He hasn’t been around for weeks.
Leiter: Who’s Weeks?
Bond: Joe Weeks. Howie fills in for him sometimes.
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Post by Isapop on Aug 23, 2021 16:58:27 GMT
If the first Bond movie had been written and directed by Abraham, Zucker, and Zucker Leiter: I wonder who is spoiling all the Cape Canaveral rocket launches. Bond: Let’s say it is SPECTRE Together: It is SPECTRE Bond: Now let’s say the interference is coming from Crab Key. Together: The interference is coming from Crab Key. Bond: I went out there with Quarrel but he didn’t come back. Leiter: Buddy didn’t come back? Bond: Buddy came back. Quarrel didn’t. And he got burned up. Leiter: Andy got burned up? Bond: Quarrel got burned up. Andy escaped. I don’t know how he did it. Leiter: Then Howie did it? Bond: Howie couldn’t have done it. He hasn’t been around for weeks. Leiter: Who’s Weeks? Bond: Joe Weeks. Howie fills in for him sometimes. Leiter: But not this time, surely.
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Post by mattgarth on Aug 23, 2021 17:20:35 GMT
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Post by Jonesy1 on Aug 23, 2021 17:21:26 GMT
Catman assumes the movie would still feature Ursula Andress? I would hope so.
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Post by Isapop on Aug 23, 2021 17:28:51 GMT
I remember that sketch! Good find!
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Post by marianne48 on Aug 23, 2021 17:56:38 GMT
If the first Bond movie had been written and directed by Abraham, Zucker, and Zucker Leiter: I wonder who is spoiling all the Cape Canaveral rocket launches. Bond: Let’s say it is SPECTRE Together: It is SPECTRE Bond: Now let’s say the interference is coming from Crab Key. Together: The interference is coming from Crab Key. Bond: I went out there with Quarrel but he didn’t come back. Leiter: Buddy didn’t come back? Bond: Buddy came back. Quarrel didn’t. And he got burned up. Leiter: Andy got burned up? Bond: Quarrel got burned up. Andy escaped. I don’t know how he did it. Leiter: Then Howie did it? Bond: Howie couldn’t have done it. He hasn’t been around for weeks. Leiter: Who’s Weeks? Bond: Joe Weeks. Howie fills in for him sometimes. Leiter: But not this time, surely. Bond: Yes, this time. And don't call me Shirley.
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Post by bravomailer on Aug 23, 2021 19:24:23 GMT
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Post by jervistetch on Aug 23, 2021 23:51:33 GMT
It’s probably best we leave Holly Goodhead out of this.
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Post by Isapop on Aug 24, 2021 0:03:15 GMT
It’s probably best we leave Holly Goodhead out of this.
"Sure do. It's been years."
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Post by snsurone on Aug 25, 2021 9:41:59 GMT
And, as Mary would say, "Good night!!"  |
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