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Post by sugarbiscuits on Apr 13, 2018 14:48:58 GMT
what motivates you to make friends? maybe you don't have any or want any? do you only have online friends and no one offline? |
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Post by croftalice2 on Apr 13, 2018 15:27:56 GMT
Only a few in real life,but on-line people are tricky
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Post by Nora on Apr 13, 2018 20:18:22 GMT
what motivates you to make friends? maybe you don't have any or want any? do you only have online friends and no one offline? 1. having people that have mutual interests around so i could do the activities i want to do with them. i have some fairly odd hobbies so its not easy to find people that like the same things i do so i like to grow the network of my friends a lot and diversify (haha makes me sound like a banker) so that may be the prevalent motivation for me. secondary - it is nice to feel like you understand someone and someone understands you and people with similar sense of humor and similar interests are usually a good match for me for that. 2. i do have a group of friends but since i move around quite a lot it gets tricky. so i always like to make new friends. 3. I have only offline friends (in a deeper meaning of the word friends) BUT I have made several online liaisons into my offline friends. A few of them actually quite close ones. I think these days its the easiest way to find people that are into the same things you are - on line. and then if the geography and chances of them not being murderous psychos permit, you become friends in real life and its great. i would totally hang out with some people from here IRL. |
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Post by Terrapin Station on Apr 13, 2018 20:23:24 GMT
Many friendships just happen naturally, of course.
But for situations where I have a(n intentional) motivation to try to become friends with someone, it's sparked by one of two things:
(1) The person is a female that I'm at least slightly attracted to,
(2) The person could be beneficial career-wise.
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Post by Nora on Apr 13, 2018 20:25:53 GMT
Only a few in real life,but on-line people are tricky why what makes them tricky? I think I only have one or two bad experiences with online people and meeting them in real life (one a jerk and the other one a systemic liar) but then maybe a dozen or so of instances where it worked out. and the jerk and a liar - it took one time meeting them to know that and that was it. I feel like it comes out fairly quickly if they are a decent human being or not, so from my pov it is sometimes worth the investment. but maybe i am too optimistic about humanity. I like Fraiser, struggle to believe in the strangeness of the stranger  |
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Post by Nora on Apr 13, 2018 20:27:07 GMT
Many friendships just happen naturally, of course. But for situations where I have a(n intentional) motivation to try to become friends with someone, it's sparked by one of two things: (1) The person is a female that I'm at least slightly attracted to, (2) The person could be beneficial career-wise. so you never desire to make a new male friendships, provided they cannot advance your career? dont you miss male friendship? or you are simply saturated in that area and thus seek it no more? |
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Post by Terrapin Station on Apr 13, 2018 20:49:06 GMT
Many friendships just happen naturally, of course. But for situations where I have a(n intentional) motivation to try to become friends with someone, it's sparked by one of two things: (1) The person is a female that I'm at least slightly attracted to, (2) The person could be beneficial career-wise. so you never desire to make a new male friendships, provided they cannot advance your career? dont you miss male friendship? or you are simply saturated in that area and thus seek it no more? I generally get along a lot better with women. I don't have much desire to hang out with men unless it's stemming from a professional association. |
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Post by deembastille on Apr 13, 2018 20:59:15 GMT
Only a few in real life,but on-line people are tricky i usually don't make friends, they make me. usually the same type of people... bubbly, always helpful/ready to help if you need it, however strategically flaky when you REALLY DO NEED THEIR HELP. [#eyeroll] i have a few close friends who are either neighbors or teachers and that is all i need. it is good to have a few friends so that you have some sort of 'out' from your life. however, usually with the friends who find me, it is hard to call them to go out to the corner pub without them 'having other plans' like all the time. |
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Post by sugarbiscuits on Apr 19, 2018 3:01:21 GMT
Only a few in real life,but on-line people are tricky some people are deceptive, some are a bit strange. online and offline. have you found it easy making friends? or is it hard to do so? what about rejection?
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Post by sugarbiscuits on Apr 19, 2018 3:02:40 GMT
Only a few in real life,but on-line people are tricky i usually don't make friends, they make me. usually the same type of people... bubbly, always helpful/ready to help if you need it, however strategically flaky when you REALLY DO NEED THEIR HELP. [#eyeroll] i have a few close friends who are either neighbors or teachers and that is all i need. it is good to have a few friends so that you have some sort of 'out' from your life. however, usually with the friends who find me, it is hard to call them to go out to the corner pub without them 'having other plans' like all the time. I am a quiet and introverted person, think that makes it harder to make friends? People didn't have any interest in me at school or college. I have tried chatting with people but it goes nowhere.
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Post by croftalice2 on Apr 19, 2018 6:12:56 GMT
i usually don't make friends, they make me. usually the same type of people... bubbly, always helpful/ready to help if you need it, however strategically flaky when you REALLY DO NEED THEIR HELP. [#eyeroll] i have a few close friends who are either neighbors or teachers and that is all i need. it is good to have a few friends so that you have some sort of 'out' from your life. however, usually with the friends who find me, it is hard to call them to go out to the corner pub without them 'having other plans' like all the time. I am a quiet and introverted person, think that makes it harder to make friends? People didn't have any interest in me at school or college. I have tried chatting with people but it goes nowhere.
It's hard to keep them too.I know a few of them who can get mad very easy,so be careful how you speak with them |
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Post by them1ghtyhumph on Apr 19, 2018 6:32:31 GMT
what motivates you to make friends? maybe you don't have any or want any? do you only have online friends and no one offline? Over the course of my 20s into my early 50s, generally sex My last 15 years, exclusively sex. Not that I'm attacking women, but if try to make friends now, it's always female, in an attempt to get laid (somewhere down the line). |
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Post by Doghouse6 on Apr 19, 2018 14:40:47 GMT
Old friends have come from everywhere: school, work, the community, chance encounters in unexpected places; some I've had for 50 years.
What motivates me to make new ones is the people I meet: interesting ones I like, and whose company I enjoy (assuming their feelings are mutual). Simple as that. And when I go for a period of time without meeting any such people, I don't make new friends.
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Post by rateater on Apr 19, 2018 15:12:41 GMT
friends are just enemies that don't have the guts to kill you
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Post by Xcalatë on Apr 19, 2018 15:37:02 GMT
Nothing, I don't make many new friends since I can't stand most people and the friends i do have are LONG time friends. like my best friend we grew up next door to each other and have been friends forever.
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Post by Archelaus on Apr 19, 2018 16:31:49 GMT
Nothing really motivates me to make friends, but I do create a friendship with people through personal interaction and friendly discussion about topics we're both interested in.
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Post by koskiewicz on Apr 19, 2018 16:39:02 GMT
...dog is god spelled backwards and is man's best friend...
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Post by Deleted on Apr 21, 2018 6:22:55 GMT
I am a sociable person and like meeting new people. 
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Post by Roberto on Apr 21, 2018 12:38:22 GMT
Is there any point to making new friends in this day and age? It feels like we are in the endgame of life, so making new friends now seems kind of pointless, since you miss all the previous experiences and development that you'd get with an old friend who you've known for a long time. Starting from scratch in 2018 doesn't make sense to me. I sure hope I'm wrong though and these days can still be looked back on in the future as "those days" but it sure doesn't feel that way now.
Does anyone know what I mean? I don't think I'm explaining it very well. It's hard to put into words.
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Post by theauxphou on Apr 22, 2018 4:51:12 GMT
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