Happy 94th Birthday Dick van Dyke!!!

The best sitcom actor of all time.

Anybody who doesn't know this joke should learn it now:

A good looking man walked into an agent's office in Hollywood and said, 'I want to be a movie star.'
Tall, handsome, and with experience on Broadway, he had the right credentials .
The agent asked, 'What's your name?' The guy said, 'My name is Penis van Lesbian .'
The agent said, 'Sir, I hate to tell you, but in order to get into Hollywood , you are going to have to change your name....you will NEVER go far in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian !'

The young man was reluctant, but agreed to do so.

And the agent happily signed an agreement with his new and upcoming star, Dick Van Dyke.

Hard to fathom, though, that producer Albert Broccoli (working with Van Dyke in "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang") sounded Van Dyke out about taking over the role of James Bond.  Van Dyke turned it down, telling Broccoli, "You've heard my British accent, haven't you?"

But really, the very idea of Dick Van Dyke looking cold and ruthless is enough right there to make you laugh.