|
Post by dirtypillows on Sept 23, 2020 21:08:44 GMT
My dad tells me I have to vote for Trump every single damn day. I don't say anything because when I told the folks I voted for Obama in 2008 my dad had a stroke and my mom had a heart attack. But it's getting on my nerves big time. Isn't it kind of rude to tell somebody how to vote?
How would you handle it without being rude?
P.S. my father has always been a bully.
|
|
|
Post by bravomailer on Sept 23, 2020 21:18:52 GMT
Back in 1964, I went into the voting booth with my mom and she let me pull the levers. She made damn sure I voted for Lyndon Johnson! Visual aid for younger people who don't know what I mean by "lever".
|
|
|
Post by Nora on Sept 23, 2020 21:25:10 GMT
My dad tells me I have to vote for Trump every single damn day. I don't say anything because when I told the folks I voted for Obama in 2008 my dad had a stroke and my mom had a heart attack. But it's getting on my nerves big time. Isn't it kind of rude to tell somebody how to vote? How would you handle it without being rude? P.S. my father has always been a bully. Thats a difficult situation, and not a very diff from mine. In the end since A) I love my parents and B) they are of senior age, are jumpy and have various health issues and C) I think love and family is more important than politics, I would just say “ok dad” or “ill think about it” and then do my thing anyway. I know lying is not nice but lets face it we all lied sometimes to our parents before and by now they are Not going to change; you are Not going to change their mind and they are unikely to change yours. Is it worth fighting over? I personally think not, within the family, with aging fragile parents that one loves. Now if you resent your parents or dont respect them or care for them much then thats different and maybe then just asking not to talk about politics and respecting u r an adult - or eventually stop taking their calls in order to stop their bullying efforts might be a better approach. I personally just say “ok dad”. I told him all I could of nice things about Obama and all I could of the bad things about Trump before, it made and will make no difference it will only cause tension and problems. Not worthy for me. Best of luck to you.
|
|
|
|
Post by moonchild on Sept 23, 2020 22:35:04 GMT
I know it's rude but I would just say shut up
|
|
|
Post by PreachCaleb on Sept 23, 2020 22:51:06 GMT
My dad tells me I have to vote for Trump every single damn day. I don't say anything because when I told the folks I voted for Obama in 2008 my dad had a stroke and my mom had a heart attack. But it's getting on my nerves big time. Isn't it kind of rude to tell somebody how to vote? How would you handle it without being rude? P.S. my father has always been a bully. I'd tell them I'm writing in for Hillary. Maybe it'd finish them off.
|
|
|
Post by Feologild Oakes on Sept 23, 2020 22:55:37 GMT
Ignore them or tell them to shut the fuck up.
|
|
|
Post by enigma72 on Sept 23, 2020 23:18:32 GMT
My dad tells me I have to vote for Trump every single damn day. I don't say anything because when I told the folks I voted for Obama in 2008 my dad had a stroke and my mom had a heart attack. But it's getting on my nerves big time. Isn't it kind of rude to tell somebody how to vote? How would you handle it without being rude? P.S. my father has always been a bully. I see it differently than the above posts DP Just say 'thanks for the suggestion/advice ' and then do what you want. Your parents are elderly and set in their ways. They obviously have their own ideas. They have health issues. Don't argue Do they know you are gay?
|
|
|
Post by dirtypillows on Sept 24, 2020 0:26:40 GMT
My dad tells me I have to vote for Trump every single damn day. I don't say anything because when I told the folks I voted for Obama in 2008 my dad had a stroke and my mom had a heart attack. But it's getting on my nerves big time. Isn't it kind of rude to tell somebody how to vote? How would you handle it without being rude? P.S. my father has always been a bully. I see it differently than the above posts DP Just say 'thanks for the suggestion/advice ' and then do what you want. Your parents are elderly and set in their ways. They obviously have their own ideas. They have health issues. Don't argue Do they know you are gay? Yeah, I hate arguing. I just hate it. I'm not confrontational by nature. I tend to take the path of least resistance towards optimal results. Though I do harbor feelings of resentments toward my dad, as Nora took a guess. I do know that my dad (mom passed away in January) does not respect me much as being my own person. And he has no problem with confrontation. I do really appreciate all the varied responses I've been getting from everybody. It helps a lot with getting a better perspective! Yeah, I came out to the folks when I was 36. It was NOT an easy thing to do.
|
|
|
Post by Ass_E9 on Sept 24, 2020 0:57:51 GMT
|
|
|
Post by enigma72 on Sept 24, 2020 0:58:45 GMT
I see it differently than the above posts DP Just say 'thanks for the suggestion/advice ' and then do what you want. Your parents are elderly and set in their ways. They obviously have their own ideas. They have health issues. Don't argue Do they know you are gay? Yeah, I hate arguing. I just hate it. I'm not confrontational by nature. I tend to take the path of least resistance towards optimal results. Though I do harbor feelings of resentments toward my dad, as Nora took a guess. I do know that my dad (mom passed away in January) does not respect me much as being my own person. And he has no problem with confrontation. I do really appreciate all the varied responses I've been getting from everybody. It helps a lot with getting a better perspective! Yeah, I came out to the folks when I was 36. It was NOT an easy thing to do. I don't think you need to confront him. All my best!
|
|
|
Post by dirtypillows on Sept 24, 2020 1:17:00 GMT
That's my problem. I never know if I'm Arbogast or Norman Bates! Aaaack!
|
|
|
Post by dirtypillows on Sept 24, 2020 1:19:18 GMT
My dad tells me I have to vote for Trump every single damn day. I don't say anything because when I told the folks I voted for Obama in 2008 my dad had a stroke and my mom had a heart attack. But it's getting on my nerves big time. Isn't it kind of rude to tell somebody how to vote? How would you handle it without being rude? P.S. my father has always been a bully. I'd tell them I'm writing in for Hillary. Maybe it'd finish them off. Oh, it would do that!
|
|
|
Post by dirtypillows on Sept 24, 2020 1:48:03 GMT
My dad tells me I have to vote for Trump every single damn day. I don't say anything because when I told the folks I voted for Obama in 2008 my dad had a stroke and my mom had a heart attack. But it's getting on my nerves big time. Isn't it kind of rude to tell somebody how to vote? How would you handle it without being rude? P.S. my father has always been a bully. Thats a difficult situation, and not a very diff from mine. In the end since A) I love my parents and B) they are of senior age, are jumpy and have various health issues and C) I think love and family is more important than politics, I would just say “ok dad” or “ill think about it” and then do my thing anyway. I know lying is not nice but lets face it we all lied sometimes to our parents before and by now they are Not going to change; you are Not going to change their mind and they are unikely to change yours. Is it worth fighting over? I personally think not, within the family, with aging fragile parents that one loves. Now if you resent your parents or dont respect them or care for them much then thats different and maybe then just asking not to talk about politics and respecting u r an adult - or eventually stop taking their calls in order to stop their bullying efforts might be a better approach. I personally just say “ok dad”. I told him all I could of nice things about Obama and all I could of the bad things about Trump before, it made and will make no difference it will only cause tension and problems. Not worthy for me. Best of luck to you. I agree. I'm not convinced that it is worth arguing over. At least not the politics part. I do feel like I have to bite my tongue all the time around him and I do kind of resent that. But then sometimes I just say to myself "pick your battles" and then it's almost like it's not worth it. The next time he says something, I might just go for diplomatic/mildly (but not really) confrontational and say "I know, you told me (that) before" and that I really don't want to talk about it. That doesn't seem rude to me.
|
|
|
Post by Sarge on Sept 24, 2020 2:16:12 GMT
Your parents are adults, treat them like adults and they will learn to treat you like an adult. If you hide your opinions and cower under their bullying they will treat you like a child forever. Intolerance is their problem, don't let them make it yours.
|
|
|
Post by dirtypillows on Sept 24, 2020 3:58:57 GMT
Your parents are adults, treat them like adults and they will learn to treat you like an adult. If you hide your opinions and cower under their bullying they will treat you like a child forever. Intolerance is their problem, don't let them make it yours. Thanks. I don't necessarily cower, but I can dodge like a maniac. That's the kind of thing that sounds good, but does not always pan out in real life. But I can appreciate the sentiment. I guess it's not outside the realm of possibility.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
@Deleted
Posts: 0
Likes:
|
Post by Deleted on Sept 24, 2020 4:41:43 GMT
Back in 1964, I went into the voting booth with my mom and she let me pull the levers. She made damn sure I voted for Lyndon Johnson! Visual aid for younger people who don't know what I mean by "lever". Back in 1964 I was in elementary school and we had those big voting machine booths in the lobby of school. Us kids got to fiddle around with all the knobs and stuff it was kind of cool and kind of learning experience. My first vote was in 1976 and those booths were still around so I knew how to do it!
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
@Deleted
Posts: 0
Likes:
|
Post by Deleted on Sept 24, 2020 4:55:58 GMT
During the primaries my mom kept telling me to vote for Biden ...I'd just let her make her biden speech and say.. "yeah... uh huh yup" then tell her, "nah im voting for Bernie." Now she thinks I'm some kind of monster and I still wont vote for Biden. We on the same side lady, aint gotta keep telling me to vote for the man. I WILL OK
|
|
|
Post by Sarge on Sept 24, 2020 7:42:11 GMT
Your parents are adults, treat them like adults and they will learn to treat you like an adult. If you hide your opinions and cower under their bullying they will treat you like a child forever. Intolerance is their problem, don't let them make it yours. Thanks. I don't necessarily cower, but I can dodge like a maniac. That's the kind of thing that sounds good, but does not always pan out in real life. But I can appreciate the sentiment. I guess it's not outside the realm of possibility. We all go through it. I did. Now I have adult kids and I'm waiting for them to act like adults. I may not like their decisions but I want to know they aren't pushovers.
|
|
|
Post by dirtypillows on Sept 24, 2020 8:25:17 GMT
Thanks. I don't necessarily cower, but I can dodge like a maniac. That's the kind of thing that sounds good, but does not always pan out in real life. But I can appreciate the sentiment. I guess it's not outside the realm of possibility. We all go through it. I did. Now I have adult kids and I'm waiting for them to act like adults. I may not like their decisions but I want to know they aren't pushovers. So, how might you react if your child disagreed with you over something you felt was important? If your child voted differently than you, what do you think you might say?
|
|