Cuish
Sophomore
@cuish
Posts: 115
Likes: 37
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Post by Cuish on Nov 26, 2017 21:17:05 GMT
Someone posts a wish.
*I wish for a new car.
The next person grants the wish, but now corrupts it.
*Granted, but the car only runs on a rare, expensive fuel that only the worldβs terrorists have access to. The terrorists will only accept a price of one thousand of your countryβs currency as payment for a monthβs worth of fuel.
Iβll get started.
I wish I could play the piano and compose music.
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Post by moviebuffbrad on Nov 26, 2017 23:14:57 GMT
Granted, but you go blind like Ray Charles and deaf like Beethoven, only without their talent
I wish I could date 90s Jennifer Love Hewitt, who also happens to have a great personality, no diseases, and delightful parents.
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Post by Sandman on Nov 27, 2017 3:20:26 GMT
Granted, but you go blind like Ray Charles and deaf like Beethoven, only without their talent I wish I could date 90s Jennifer Love Hewitt, who also happens to have a great personality, no diseases, and delightful parents. But whoever dates Jennifer turns into this after one month of dating. I want a road and trail motorcycle.
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Post by Ass_E9 on Nov 27, 2017 4:14:32 GMT
I wish I could date 90s Jennifer Love Hewitt, who also happens to have a great personality, no diseases, and delightful parents. Granted. Enjoy your date with 92-year-old Jennifer Love Hewitt.
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Post by moviebuffbrad on Nov 27, 2017 5:44:56 GMT
I wish I could date 90s Jennifer Love Hewitt, who also happens to have a great personality, no diseases, and delightful parents. Granted. Enjoy your date with 92-year-old Jennifer Love Hewitt.You clever son of a b****.
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Cuish
Sophomore
@cuish
Posts: 115
Likes: 37
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Post by Cuish on Nov 27, 2017 14:58:53 GMT
"I want a road and trail motorcycle."
Granted, but the motorcycle can only go twenty mph.
I wish for the ability to time travel.
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Post by JHA Durant on Nov 28, 2017 7:29:50 GMT
Granted, but you can only travel back five minutes at the most, and you suffer Chernobyl levels of radiation each time you use it.
I wish for world peace.
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Cuish
Sophomore
@cuish
Posts: 115
Likes: 37
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Post by Cuish on Nov 28, 2017 18:06:14 GMT
Granted, but aliens attack and take over the earth.
I wish to open a successful sandwich shop.
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Post by JHA Durant on Nov 29, 2017 0:27:37 GMT
Granted, but only after a food poisoning lawsuit, claims of slave labor by a rival company, complaints over the lack of a gender-neutral toilet, an attempted takeover by a major fast food restaurant, frequent rat sightings in the kitchen and almost bankruptcy.
Cheer up, by the mid 2040s the sandwich shop should be a roaring success!
I wish for a Lamborghini.
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Post by Catman on Nov 29, 2017 0:31:41 GMT
You will get the Lamborghini, but it will still smell of the dead guy who was in it for several months.
Catman wishes for one hundred cats.
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Post by JHA Durant on Nov 29, 2017 0:37:09 GMT
Granted, but the cats all have parasites and your home is deemed a health hazard to the entire neighborhood as a result.
I wish for the holiday from hell!
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Post by Catman on Nov 29, 2017 0:39:11 GMT
You will arrive for your holiday in hell on the day it freezes over.
Catman wishes for some fresh catnip.
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Post by HirundoRustica on Dec 4, 2017 16:56:33 GMT
Granted, but you then suffer muscle weakness, poor coordination, numbness in paws, skin rashes, anxiety, and memory problems and you suddenly have trouble meowing, seeing and hearing, and the vet eventually diagnose you with mercury poisoning. It is later discovered that the catnip was grown illegally in an old industrial dumping ground where the soil was saturated with mercury.
I wish to win millions in the lottery.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
@Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 4, 2017 18:14:36 GMT
Granted, but you win the North Korean lottery, 10 million Won paid at 1 Won per year for 10 million years.
I wish I was an Oscar Meyer weiner.
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Post by HirundoRustica on Dec 4, 2017 18:36:44 GMT
Granted, but instead of being consumed by a sexy young woman, you end up in the gob of a gluttonous fat bastard with mouth sores.
I wish for a unicorn.
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Post by Catman on Dec 4, 2017 19:13:38 GMT
Alas, your unicorn is actually Princess Unikitty.
Catman wishes for a new season of Galavant.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 4, 2017 19:20:52 GMT
Granted, all roles will be recast using the members of The View.
I wish that I could remember where I parked my car.
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Post by BATouttaheck on Dec 4, 2017 22:13:00 GMT
I wish that I could remember where I parked my car.
Granted but find that the car was stolen and used by some punks who crashed it into an electric pole and died gruesome deaths. It was later determined that since you left the keys in the unlocked car YOU are responsible for the deaths and will be sent to prison for 25 years to life.
I wish that I had an idea for a wish that could not be "corrupted".
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Post by Catman on Dec 4, 2017 23:05:17 GMT
Your wish to have an incorruptible wish is attained, but you forget where you parked your car. And to make things worse, you also left your keys in the ignition.
Catman wishes for snow.
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Post by BATouttaheck on Dec 5, 2017 3:29:28 GMT
Catman wishes for snow. You have snow BUT so much snow that your roof collapses and you have to spend the money you were saving for that trip to Bermuda on fixing the roof. I wish someone else makes the next wish
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