Fifty Shades of Boring Vanilla

I couldnt event bring myself to care about the ending, nobodys actions were interesting and/or believable.

And it didnt even have any internal consistence. The top bodyguards that this gazzilionaire was paying allow for crimes to routinely happen to his family? A bodyguard allows his asset enter a dark room first without checking?  A character that is less mature/grown up than Peter Pan AND has outbursts of unmananged anger AND looks like a lost boy is supposed to be someone we root for? Gee. 

I think I will have to watch History of Violence or Irreversible now just to forget about this failure and remind myself of good movies with well shot sex scenes.

Even a silly flick like Shoot Em Up had sexier scenes and that was a pretty ridiculous movie (that I loved nevertheless).

true, in my theatre some people loudly cheered or booed or were trying to warn the character, all signs of them being really really into it. i dont get it though.

the only explanation i can give myself is that this movie is a reflection on how sexually repressed and conservative (majority of) americans must be. that to them this is something thats incredibly sexy and/or thrilling. 

1. In case you thought I were - I am not an American myself

2. In my experience, the reactions to movies in Europe and in the USA are generally quite different. In Europe you rarely have people talking (out loud) to the characters on-screen as much (or on their mobile phones during the film, that is something I have ONLY seen happen in the US and I go to the movies 4 times a week each week no matter where I live). Now you may say Americans are less inhibited and more emotional. May be. But there simply are cultural differences that exhibit for example in the way people react to a movie. Americans will often laugh at quite different things than Europeans (or Asians), its intriguing to examine actually, if you have the chance and happen to be in different countries in the position to examine it. The same joke in the same setting but will get a different response based on the country. But regardless of that, I wasnt deriving the fact that Americans seem to enjoy Fifty Shades more than Non-Americans solely from the reactions  of the few vocal people in the cinema.

3. You are correct that non-americans purchased more copies/tickets to Fifty Shades. But then again, "non-american" means about 60 other countries TOGETHER. Of course they are going to represent the higher number since its the "rest of the world" (in which americans only represent 300 million out of what, 6 billion?) You can hardly compare those numbers and claim that it means "non americans like it more" - it may just mean there is simply many more non Americans in total.

But I am all for scientific approach, if you care to join me, lets find out which country digs Fifty Shades more, so we can call THEM laughably sexually repressed. I will happily apologize to all the not at all repressed americans that recognize how boring Fifty Shades is sexually. :-)

We should compare percentage of movie goers vs population. I haven't done the math country-per-country yet (I looked at UK, Germany, France and US so far) for the movies. Want to do the rest?

4. I wasnt talking about (or expecting) Oscar worthiness. I enjoy stupid/silly/non artistic movies a lot actually. Went into it expecting trash. And the movie being trashy is not the problem. Its the movie not working together as intended. Its not erotic or romantic, (forget cinematographic). To me thats the problem.

5. There is plenty of non-pornographic movies that show sex in a way that it is sexy, erotic, and believable and shows more than two heads smushed together kissing/licking each other. No cream pie needed, but if you have seen all 3 of them you must realize there is less sex shown in this installment. No genitals (unlike before), no positions other than missionary (unlike before), no full body shots (unlike before) of either one of them having sex, just details or half body shots. For a movie thats supposed to be erotic, sexually daring and about a sexual relationship mainly, its just very odd.

but overall - are you honestly saying that you believe that Americans as a whole (lets generalize just for the sake of this thread) are less sexually conservative than for example Europeans?  

If so, then if Americans go to Europe and meet European girls, they usually (on average) expect and experience EU girls to be more sexually conservative or more sexually adventurous in your opinion? I am genuinely interested in knowing what you think (and others who care to join). Always happy to learn something new.