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Post by lenlenlen1 on Aug 7, 2018 22:41:53 GMT
Well in terms of anything where you're trying to attract the opposite sex women always have the upper hand there. Bottom line - we want something they have.
As far as the agencies where a woman worker can work one-on-one with a male client its because women are FAR, FAR, less likely to rape. And the same with the women shelters. That's just a statistical truth. I'm not gonna knock that.
About the statistic thing, that's true but that is a good example of why someone who is a good guy with good intentions could feel oppressed. Men are paying for the actions of other men. True. But then that's kinda on us, no? All the more reason for us to step up and call out the bad behavior; To differentiate ourselves from the "bad guys".
Unfortunately, the #metoo movement is a blunt instrument right now. When it becomes more clearly defined we wont have to worry as much. I think we'll come to find it as our friend too.
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Post by lenlenlen1 on Aug 7, 2018 22:50:00 GMT
I am privileged because I am naturally such a Chad and an alpha, as well as a world leader. I am oppressed because I have to put up with CHAD'S treacherous neighbor Sudan and western world leaders who do not take me seriously because I am from Africa. That's not why we don't take you seriously...
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Post by Deleted on Aug 7, 2018 22:51:20 GMT
In what ways are you personally oppressed and in what ways are you personally privileged? All humans are oppressed by the faults and limitations of the human condition.
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Harmless elf
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Post by Harmless elf on Aug 7, 2018 23:07:47 GMT
About the statistic thing, that's true but that is a good example of why someone who is a good guy with good intentions could feel oppressed. Men are paying for the actions of other men. True. But then that's kinda on us, no? All the more reason for us to step up and call out the bad behavior; To differentiate ourselves from the "bad guys".
Unfortunately, the #metoo movement is a blunt instrument right now. When it becomes more clearly defined we wont have to worry as much. I think we'll come to find it as our friend too.
no I don't believe it's on us it's on them I'm not responsible for the actions of another person. I've actually been on the receiving end of it through out my life. I think girls aren't used to seeing a skinny guy that has a butt that sticks out so that's why it's got so much attention, and you may not believe me but it has always made me uncomfortable.
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Post by lenlenlen1 on Aug 7, 2018 23:33:06 GMT
True. But then that's kinda on us, no? All the more reason for us to step up and call out the bad behavior; To differentiate ourselves from the "bad guys".
Unfortunately, the #metoo movement is a blunt instrument right now. When it becomes more clearly defined we wont have to worry as much. I think we'll come to find it as our friend too.
no I don't believe it's on us it's on them I'm not responsible for the actions of another person. I've actually been on the receiving end of it through out my life. I think girls aren't used to seeing a skinny guy that has a butt that sticks out so that's why it's got so much attention, and you may not believe me but it has always made me uncomfortable. So what you're saying is that you've been... smirk... the butt... smirk... of the joke! HA HA HAH HA HAHAH! oH I'm SoRrY! I COULDNT RESIST!
Forgive the pun. I didn't mean it (or did !?)
But in all seriousness, you've been at the receiving end of humor that offended you, so know what it like. It sucks. I was an only child of a single mom so the big joke on me was "mammas boy". It goes around.
The lesson I learned was that if I didn't like it, then probably no one else likes it either. So if I can in some way help to cut that crap, by checking myself, and by calling it out when I see someone else doing it, then that's what I'm gonna do.
What you're saying is that since you didn't do it, then you have shouldn't have to do anything about it. What a more effed up place it would be if we all thought like that.
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Post by lenlenlen1 on Aug 7, 2018 23:56:52 GMT
That's not why we don't take you seriously...
Respect CHAD or meet a dire fate.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 8, 2018 0:00:42 GMT
I am privileged because I am naturally such a Chad and an alpha, as well as a world leader. I am oppressed because I have to put up with CHAD'S treacherous neighbor Sudan and western world leaders who do not take me seriously because I am from Africa. Nobody in this world gives a flying fuck about Chad Also this Chad thing that you are doing got old a long time ago.
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Harmless elf
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Post by Harmless elf on Aug 8, 2018 0:02:26 GMT
no I don't believe it's on us it's on them I'm not responsible for the actions of another person. I've actually been on the receiving end of it through out my life. I think girls aren't used to seeing a skinny guy that has a butt that sticks out so that's why it's got so much attention, and you may not believe me but it has always made me uncomfortable. So what you're saying is that you've been... smirk... the butt... smirk... of the joke! HA HA HAH HA HAHAH! oH I'm SoRrY! I COULDNT RESIST!
Forgive the pun. I didn't mean it (or did !?)
But in all seriousness, you've been at the receiving end of humor that offended you, so know what it like. It sucks. I was an only child of a single mom so the big joke on me was "mammas boy". It goes around.
The lesson I learned was that if I didn't like it, then probably no one else likes it either. So if I can in some way help to cut that crap, by checking myself, and by calling it out when I see someone else doing it, then that's what I'm gonna do.
What you're saying is that since you didn't do it, then you have shouldn't have to do anything about it. What a more effed up place it would be if we all thought like that.
I'm sorry but when did I say that? I didn't say I wouldn't do anything about it or speak up against it. I'm just saying it is more of a rare case when it's the other way around and the thing is just like how when girls don't speak up, guys don't speak up because they're embarrassed by it. also if you're a guy and bring it up usually you just get a laughing reaction or people saying yeah but you probably liked it. also if you're a guy and you say to a girl yeah I know how you feel they'll be like no no you don't know how I feel it's not the same for guys. even though it kind of is the same if you're a guy and you're shy not very sexual and most of the girls are bigger than you. There is a double standard. for example when I was 22 and in the psych ward of the hospital. One of the nurses who was in her 40s said to me "if you go near the kettle again I'll put you over my knee and spank you." now imagine if that was the other way around and it was a guy saying that to a young girl? And there were other people around so it's not like it was private, people just laughed.
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Post by lenlenlen1 on Aug 8, 2018 0:10:45 GMT
So what you're saying is that you've been... smirk... the butt... smirk... of the joke! HA HA HAH HA HAHAH! oH I'm SoRrY! I COULDNT RESIST!
Forgive the pun. I didn't mean it (or did !?)
But in all seriousness, you've been at the receiving end of humor that offended you, so know what it like. It sucks. I was an only child of a single mom so the big joke on me was "mammas boy". It goes around.
The lesson I learned was that if I didn't like it, then probably no one else likes it either. So if I can in some way help to cut that crap, by checking myself, and by calling it out when I see someone else doing it, then that's what I'm gonna do.
What you're saying is that since you didn't do it, then you have shouldn't have to do anything about it. What a more effed up place it would be if we all thought like that.
I'm sorry but when did I say that? I didn't say I wouldn't do anything about it or speak up against it. I'm just saying it is more of a rare case when it's the other way around and the thing is just like how when girls don't speak up, guys don't speak up because they're embarrassed by it. also if you're a guy and bring it up usually you just get a laughing reaction or people saying yeah but you probably liked it. also if you're a guy and you say to a girl yeah I know how you feel they'll be like no no you don't know how I feel it's not the same for guys. even though it kind of is the same if you're a guy and you're shy not very sexual and most of the girls are bigger than you. There is a double standard. for example when I was 22 and in the psych ward of the hospital. One of the nurses who was in her 40s said to me "if you go near the kettle again I'll put you over my knee and spank you." now imagine if that was the other way around and it was a guy saying that to a young girl? And there were other people around so it's not like it was private, people just laughed. Um.... okay....
"...put you over my knee and spank you." There's definitely a butt thing going in your life! HA HA HAH! I'm sorry! I'm trying to hold it back...
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Post by Deleted on Aug 8, 2018 0:13:15 GMT
I don't feel particularly oppressed or privileged. I just... do what I do, and take it as it comes.
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Post by Terrapin Station on Aug 8, 2018 0:14:52 GMT
Umm . . . I'm oppressed by not being able to hang out in women's locker rooms at my whim, and I'm privileged by having a fun job that doesn't require anything like normal hours?
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Harmless elf
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Post by Harmless elf on Aug 8, 2018 0:23:59 GMT
I'm sorry but when did I say that? I didn't say I wouldn't do anything about it or speak up against it. I'm just saying it is more of a rare case when it's the other way around and the thing is just like how when girls don't speak up, guys don't speak up because they're embarrassed by it. also if you're a guy and bring it up usually you just get a laughing reaction or people saying yeah but you probably liked it. also if you're a guy and you say to a girl yeah I know how you feel they'll be like no no you don't know how I feel it's not the same for guys. even though it kind of is the same if you're a guy and you're shy not very sexual and most of the girls are bigger than you. There is a double standard. for example when I was 22 and in the psych ward of the hospital. One of the nurses who was in her 40s said to me "if you go near the kettle again I'll put you over my knee and spank you." now imagine if that was the other way around and it was a guy saying that to a young girl? And there were other people around so it's not like it was private, people just laughed. Um.... okay....
"...put you over my knee and spank you." There's definitely a butt thing going in your life! HA HA HAH! I'm sorry! I'm trying to hold it back...
Yep your reply is exactly my point. I've told other people that story and they just laugh. The truth is that most guys probably would like it if it happens to them. And there's probably a lot of women that secretly enjoy it too especially the ones that don't get a lot of male attention. however I think the difference is guys don't have to think the woman is hot to enjoy it where as I think girls do have to think the guy is hot. I'm just going by what I've heard people say.
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Post by kls on Aug 8, 2018 0:24:58 GMT
I don't see myself as held back or getting something I don't deserve;
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Post by deembastille on Aug 8, 2018 1:27:27 GMT
I am oppressed because I am a white woman working in a 'ghetto' community [their word not mine]. I am oppressed because I am white because I am automatically pegged as racist because I am white. I am also pegged as fake because what many other white women do in my school is work there for a year or so and then move on to another school. the people in the community think I will pull that shit, too. funny... I am still there after 16 years.
I am privileged because I am a solid influence in my kids [my 16 years] and they know I am stable in my position there. they can rely on me to be there. they can trust me and I really am trustworthy. these kids divulge in me their troubles and know that I will only tell someone else [someone big] if I absolutely have to. they also know that if all they need is a warm hug, they will get it from me. sometimes all someone needs to know is that someone I there for them. someone will listen to them. someone will make the time for them. someone will not judge them.
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Post by deembastille on Aug 8, 2018 1:29:15 GMT
About the statistic thing, that's true but that is a good example of why someone who is a good guy with good intentions could feel oppressed. Men are paying for the actions of other men. True. But then that's kinda on us, no? All the more reason for us to step up and call out the bad behavior; To differentiate ourselves from the "bad guys".
Unfortunately, the #metoo movement is a blunt instrument right now. When it becomes more clearly defined we wont have to worry as much. I think we'll come to find it as our friend too.
isn't this statement the same as telling a raped woman she was raped because her skirt was shorter than her bra or something?
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Post by dirtypillows on Aug 8, 2018 2:56:57 GMT
True. But then that's kinda on us, no? All the more reason for us to step up and call out the bad behavior; To differentiate ourselves from the "bad guys".
Unfortunately, the #metoo movement is a blunt instrument right now. When it becomes more clearly defined we wont have to worry as much. I think we'll come to find it as our friend too.
no I don't believe it's on us it's on them I'm not responsible for the actions of another person. I've actually been on the receiving end of it through out my life. I think girls aren't used to seeing a skinny guy that has a butt that sticks out so that's why it's got so much attention, and you may not believe me but it has always made me uncomfortable. Absolutely agree. It's challenging enough for me to be responsible for my own life and actions. And feeling this way does not imply apathy or not doing anything to help others out. But to actually be responsible for somebody else's life (parents of children being the exception) is a very weighty thing. I mean, if I've learned one thing, it's that there is nobody on this planet who is responsible for my feelings. (Not even a therapist, who I would be paying for help!) And this is where is starts.
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Post by dirtypillows on Aug 8, 2018 3:02:37 GMT
no I don't believe it's on us it's on them I'm not responsible for the actions of another person. I've actually been on the receiving end of it through out my life. I think girls aren't used to seeing a skinny guy that has a butt that sticks out so that's why it's got so much attention, and you may not believe me but it has always made me uncomfortable. So what you're saying is that you've been... smirk... the butt... smirk... of the joke! HA HA HAH HA HAHAH! oH I'm SoRrY! I COULDNT RESIST!
Forgive the pun. I didn't mean it (or did !?)
But in all seriousness, you've been at the receiving end of humor that offended you, so know what it like. It sucks. I was an only child of a single mom so the big joke on me was "mammas boy". It goes around.
The lesson I learned was that if I didn't like it, then probably no one else likes it either. So if I can in some way help to cut that crap, by checking myself, and by calling it out when I see someone else doing it, then that's what I'm gonna do.
What you're saying is that since you didn't do it, then you have shouldn't have to do anything about it. What a more effed up place it would be if we all thought like that.
I think you're putting words in his mouth. You said "it's on us" and he said "no, it's not" and you basically accused him of apathy, when that's very, very far away from where he was coming from.
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Post by dirtypillows on Aug 8, 2018 3:05:07 GMT
Um.... okay....
"...put you over my knee and spank you." There's definitely a butt thing going in your life! HA HA HAH! I'm sorry! I'm trying to hold it back...
Yep your reply is exactly my point. I've told other people that story and they just laugh. The truth is that most guys probably would like it if it happens to them. And there's probably a lot of women that secretly enjoy it too especially the ones that don't get a lot of male attention. however I think the difference is guys don't have to think the woman is hot to enjoy it where as I think girls do have to think the guy is hot. I'm just going by what I've heard people say. Yep. Exactly. He seems to have a blind spot on the matter. He made a joke at the expense of your sincerity.
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Post by dirtypillows on Aug 8, 2018 3:06:55 GMT
I am privileged because I am naturally such a Chad and an alpha, as well as a world leader. I am oppressed because I have to put up with CHAD'S treacherous neighbor Sudan and western world leaders who do not take me seriously because I am from Africa. Nobody in this world gives a flying fuck about Chad Also this Chad thing that you are doing got old a long time ago.That was pretty funny. But somehow I don't think this Mister Chad fella is going to be so easily deterred.
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Post by lenlenlen1 on Aug 8, 2018 15:58:17 GMT
I am oppressed because I am a white woman working in a 'ghetto' community [their word not mine]. I am oppressed because I am white because I am automatically pegged as racist because I am white. I am also pegged as fake because what many other white women do in my school is work there for a year or so and then move on to another school. the people in the community think I will pull that shit, too. funny... I am still there after 16 years. I am privileged because I am a solid influence in my kids [my 16 years] and they know I am stable in my position there. they can rely on me to be there. they can trust me and I really am trustworthy. these kids divulge in me their troubles and know that I will only tell someone else [someone big] if I absolutely have to. they also know that if all they need is a warm hug, they will get it from me. sometimes all someone needs to know is that someone I there for them. someone will listen to them. someone will make the time for them. someone will not judge them. So, wait... you're oppressed because you work in the ONE place in the WORLD where it's not a benefit to be white? Your thinking in this regard highly erroneous. Let me explain:
While in that ONE place you may be the minority, true, but there is NO OTHER PLACE WHERE BEING WHITE PUTS YOU IN THE MAJORITY OR AT A DISADVANTAGE. NONE. In the world! Even in Africa white people are treated better than their own black people depending on what caste they're in.
Whereas the people of color that live in that "ghetto" you work in, are disadvantaged EVERYWHERE ELSE THEY GO. So you really got it all back asswards on that one.
That's also how you're privileged. And you don't even know it. Because as a white person in a white dominated country and culture you don't HAVE to think about it. You can expect in your life that most things are going to be white dominated, geared for whites, and reflect white values. You can turn on the tv and see mostly white faces. You can watch the news and see mostly black criminals. You can go the movies and expect to see, still even in this day and age, heroes that are mostly white, when you go the store you can be guaranteed that you are no being watched by security guards because of your race, when you move into a new neighborhood no one even jokes "there goes the neighborhood", when you go pick up a book at the library the person behind the desk probably doesn't think "she can read?". You clearly have NO IDEA how privileged you are. There at so many ways.
So don't boo hoo about working in the ghetto. Some of us were born, raised AND worked in the ghetto. Some of us don't get to leave the ghetto so easily. Don't even get me started on all the ways the system keeps people in the IN THE GEHTTO. With your 16 years of experience you can get a job anywhere else, whereas most of the people that live in that ghetto may not have that same opportunity. You work there because you CHOOSE to.
You're probably a good person who wants to help, and I commend that highly. But you're also greatly misinformed if you honestly believe what you posted. Which brings me to another point: In the first paragraph of your post I detect a little...I don't know... I a little "fuck you" to the community you work in. Just a little venom towards people that might dare suggest that you have unearned privileges like the ones I mention above. And its that tone that makes for the gravest offense. If you honestly think that between the two of you, people born and raised in "ghettos' and you, that YOU'RE the victimized one... then your living an unanalyzed life.
As for your second paragraph I can see that you are a kind and caring parent, something else I highly commend. I only had one of those, not two. So I can understand how hard it is to be a parent and a single mother at that. It wasn't easy for my mother. But she, like you, persevered. But that's not a privilege. That's your duty. You're supposed to be a good parent and love your children.
I expect there'll be a shitstorm coming my way once I post this, but my vibes towards you are peace and love. Here goes...
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