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Post by sdm3 on Oct 12, 2022 14:25:26 GMT
Welcome to Lee Carvallo's Putting Challenge. I am Carvallo. Now, choose a club. [beep] You have chosen a three wood. May I suggest a putter?
[beep] Three wood. Now enter the force of your swing. I suggest "feather touch." [beep, beep, beep] You have entered "power drive". Now, push seven eight seven to swing.
Ball is in parking lot. Would you like to play again? [beep] You have selected: "No."
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Post by masterofallgoons on Oct 12, 2022 14:28:41 GMT
No TV and no beer make Homer... something, something.
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Post by sdm3 on Oct 12, 2022 14:32:38 GMT
No TV and no beer make Homer... something, something. Mom, is Dad gonna kill us? We're just gonna have to wait and see.
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Post by masterofallgoons on Oct 12, 2022 14:59:16 GMT
No TV and no beer make Homer... something, something. Mom, is Dad gonna kill us? We're just gonna have to wait and see. This house has a quite a long and colorful history; it was built on an ancient Indian burial ground, and was the setting of satanic rituals, witch burnings, and 5 John Denver Christmas specials.
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Post by hehatesshe on Oct 12, 2022 15:33:52 GMT
Can't someone ELSE do it?
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Post by Winston Wolfe on Oct 13, 2022 3:16:30 GMT
I'm going to enjoy devouring you, Bart Simpson. Yes...I believe I'll start, as you've so often suggested, by "eating your shorts."
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Post by masterofallgoons on Oct 13, 2022 12:18:49 GMT
Lisa, Stop Being So Suspicious. Did Everyone Wash Their Necks Like Mr. Burns Asked?
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Post by Rey Kahuka on Oct 13, 2022 13:04:15 GMT
“Twenty-three is old. It's almost 25, which is like almost mid-20s.”
― Jessica Simpson
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Post by klawrencio79 on Oct 13, 2022 15:11:27 GMT
The Frogurt is also CURSED!
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Post by sdm3 on Oct 14, 2022 18:23:21 GMT
"Asleep at the switch?!" I wasn't asleep! I was drunk!
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Post by masterofallgoons on Oct 14, 2022 19:11:20 GMT
Oh my God, space aliens! Don't eat me, I have a wife and kids! Eat them!
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Post by wonderburstanger on Oct 15, 2022 16:57:43 GMT
Books are useless! I only ever read one book, "To Kill A Mockingbird" and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin, but what good does *that* do me?
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Post by wonderburstanger on Oct 15, 2022 16:59:31 GMT
Homer : Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took a home wine-making course and forgot how to drive?
Marge : That's because you were drunk!
Homer : And how!
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Post by Winston Wolfe on Oct 24, 2022 18:51:00 GMT
Oh glory of glories. Oh heavenly testament to the eternal majesty of God’s creation.
…HOLY MACARONI!
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Post by sdm3 on Oct 24, 2022 19:33:39 GMT
I knew we wouldn't win.
Well, why didn't you tell the rest of us? WHY DID YOU KEEP IT A SECRET?!
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Post by masterofallgoons on Oct 24, 2022 20:16:43 GMT
Quoth the Raven, "Eat my shorts!"
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Post by Winston Wolfe on Nov 23, 2022 6:18:56 GMT
Aurora Borealis?!
At this time of year
At this time of day
In this part of the country
Localized entirely within your kitchen?
Yes.
May I see it?
...No.
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Post by hoskotafe3 on Nov 23, 2022 9:58:58 GMT
Paraphrasing but "Max Power." "Great name." "Yes it is, isn't it? I got it off a hair-dryer."
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Post by hoskotafe3 on Nov 23, 2022 10:01:52 GMT
And one of my favourites "When I held that gun in my hand I felt an incredible surge of power, like God must feel when He holds a gun!"
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Post by Winston Wolfe on Dec 21, 2022 4:50:11 GMT
Damn.....long way to go before this catches up to the vastly inferior Seinfeld quotes thread He's nothing like your old dog. Santa's Little Helper? Guess I was the only one who loved him. You got that right! Remember the time he ate my goldfish, and you lied to me and said I never had any goldfish? Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl?
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